Mesmerised Profile


Location: South Africa

Member Since: March 2014

Open for read requests: Yes

Profile Information

Who am I?




I suffer from Attention Deficit Disorder. At my worst I either procrastinate to the extreme or hyper-focus to the detriment of everything else.

I am an avid reader with a personal collection of about 4000 books and am forbidden to purchase any more unless I sell 5 from my collection for each book I buy :(  Therefore my eBook collection has grown to 250 books in two months. My tastes are eclectic and are dependent on my mood at the time. My love for English has lead me to do some ghost-writing/editing. Hobbies include sketching, painting, teaching art, sewing, cakes decoration etc. (actually anything that requires creativity). charity work, growing vegetables, tutoring and collecting fairies to name just a few. At present I have seven cats and three dogs.

I was raised in a deeply religious family and my FIFTY SHADES OF FUCKED UP has made me two people. The one is sweet, shy and subservient and the other came out to play on the times I made third base. About 10 years into my marriage due to various circumstances she emerged and played for a month, shocking the community. She takes control, excites and me. Unfortunately I cannot achieve a balance; it is either one or the other.

FSoFU Stage 1 ► Incest daily abuse (Age 4/5) → Incest +- 6 times a year (Ages 6-11) →  confused by my bodies taboo reactions to the touch of my neighbours 22 year old son (Age 9-11) → needing those feelings lead to some innovative kinbaku (Age 10) → first base with Jimmy (Age 11)

FSoFU Stage 2 ► A new town → almost every weekend in the company of my abuser for the next 15 years → my abusers constant lewd comments and requests to smell/taste my panties made me feel like a slut → his deep tongue kiss when he drops me off at church for a youth meeting, breaks me and leave me feeling dirty (12) → first base Barry (Age 12) →  abused in my sleep by my best friends brother (Age17) → an evening of neverending. excruciating second base orgasms with my 32 year old boss after we were accidently locked in (Age 18)

FSoFU Stage 3 ► Another province → third base with my cousin (Age15/16), third base with John (Age 17/18)

FSoFU Stage 4 ► Things that eat so deep into my soul

FS of PERFECT ► My husband → two years of second base (Age 19/20) → 3 years of third base → long marriage

My abuser become my second born son's godfather. He has since passed away.


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