Just another rant

Just another rant Just another rant

Status: Finished

Genre: Erotica

Details

Status: Finished

Genre: Erotica

Summary

Just how difficult is it to write erotica? After reading the reviews of Fifty shades of Grey, I believe even a 10 year old has the potential to excel in this genre. And who cares that ‘excel’ here refers to being appreciated by women(girls, mostly) who prefer reading soppy crap rather than watching actual porn or doing something meaningful. As you long as you make some money off of it. So maybe I should try to write something down, something sexual as a way to pass the time and explore my creative writing skills. Since I do not like writing about myself, I guess this is the next best option. I just hope I don’t sound like the American Psycho character or something. The experience that I’ll try to project in the coming paragraph is not an actual one, just something I thought of just now as a bid to make this banter somewhat interesting. No matter what shit I write, these are not my actual views and I’m just hoping to write something interesting. So here goes nothing.

Summary

Just how difficult is it to write erotica? After reading the reviews of Fifty shades of Grey, I believe even a 10 year old has the potential to excel in this genre. And who cares that ‘excel’ here refers to being appreciated by women(girls, mostly) who prefer reading soppy crap rather than watching actual porn or doing something meaningful. As you long as you make some money off of it. So maybe I should try to write something down, something sexual as a way to pass the time and explore my creative writing skills. Since I do not like writing about myself, I guess this is the next best option. I just hope I don’t sound like the American Psycho character or something. The experience that I’ll try to project in the coming paragraph is not an actual one, just something I thought of just now as a bid to make this banter somewhat interesting. No matter what shit I write, these are not my actual views and I’m just hoping to write something interesting. So here goes nothing.

Content

Submitted: January 28, 2014

A A A | A A A

Content

Submitted: January 28, 2014

A A A

A A A


 

I sat in a bar, a moody teetotaler. I felt alone, not in the mood to socialize, and probably never have been. Not exactly the best personality trait. I looked around, hoping to find someone who I could gaze upon for the remainder of the night. No such luck. Or maybe I wasn’t looking hard enough….there were so many people. And then I saw her. My penis stiffened considerably (might I add, I’m not really a romantic guy). I estimated she was 5’6 without the heels and looked absolutely….scrumptious. No way I would have any chance with her. But maybe, just maybe, sometimes girls want it as much as guys do? Not sure what the hell I was doing, but I guess from now on my penis had taken control of my brain. I walked up to her and asked her whether she hated this bar as much as I did. She looked me up and down and hesitantly replied yes. I guess I’m not that bad after all. Getting to the point since I really didn’t give a shit about her, I told her whether she would be interested in a one night stand to alleviate some of the boredom. She just said “200 dollars’’. And then it hit me, she was a hooker. Of course, why else would a girl even talk to me? But did I really care anyway, I think this was exactly what I needed. I suggested  the washroom and she consented. I guess I really was desperate. I chose the handicapped washroom( logic ftw) so we could have some privacy. Locking the door and probably the last of my cognitive functions, I immediately started tearing at her clothes. I’m not really surprised that she isn’t wearing a bra. Her breasts are perfect, no sagginess and just the right curvature. I pushed her up against the wall and ripped off her skirt and panties. I hope I don’t have to pay extra for the clothes. She is clean shaved, less hair down there than my eyebrows. I insert a finger and she moans. Fake, I suspect but her pleasure is the last thing on my mind. I hurriedly drop my pants and thrust into her. Now I’m the one who is moaning and it’s definitely not fake. It’s been a long, long time. I had the best sex ever that night…..for 20 seconds. And it’s not because someone barged into the washroom, the fault was all mine. I did the unthinkable, I came with a loud groan and immediately felt ashamed. I couldn’t even last half a minute. Have you ever stood in a handicapped washroom with your now limp dick hanging out in front of an appalled prostitute and wondering what the hell you’re doing in life? No? It doesn’t feel good, to say the least. Not wanting to talk, I paid her then and there. I felt stupid, like I’d bought a new iphone and realized that I myself had thrown my hard earned money down the drain. The orgasm had no doubt been amazing but I guess you could say it wasn’t really worth it. I guess I should stick to porn. But no, I wasn’t in high school anymore, and I’d had enough of that as it is. Hopefully I won’t humiliate myself like this in the future and hopefully, it might just be with a girl who’s not a hooker.

P.S- This is definitely not erotica by any pathetic standard, I guess you could just call it the sexual experience of some guy who is sexually frustrated. I’m sure millions will identify with that one ;)

 


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