Queer As Folk: Opened

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksiesilk Classic Group

This story is FAN fiction. It is based on Showtime's hit television series Queer As Folk. I do not own the characters or anything affiliated with this show. This is for entertainment purposes and no copyright infringement is intended. My story is called 'Opened' and is written for Queer As Folk fans. This story is completed! This story is not betaed. WARNING: If homosexuality or homosexual behaviour offends you, then DO NOT READ THIS STORY. Any obscene comments will be disregarded and deleted. Otherwise, enjoy! For those unfamiliar with QAF, the photo posted with this story are the two main characters of this story. Brian (the brunette) and Justin (the blond).


Title: Opened


Author: midriffkitty -+-France-+-


Characters: Brian/Justin/Ethan


Genre: Gapfiller


Summary: Episode 301. What if Brian was at the loft when Justin went there to pick up his stuff?


Rating: NC-17 (X-rated for sexual content)


Title: Opened

Author: midriffkitty -+-France-+-

Characters: Brian/Justin/Ethan

Genre: Gapfiller

Summary: Episode 301. What if Brian was at the loft when Justin went there to pick up his stuff?

Rating: NC-17

 

Justin had convinced Ethan that it didn't matter whether or not Brian was at the loft when he would go to retrieve his things there, but the thing is... it did matter. Justin thought about what he'd do or what he'd say if he saw Brian there. Those thoughts made him nervous. He had planned on coming to the loft with Brian the night of the Rage party, but things took on a whole new turn. When he saw Brian fucking ‘Rage' it was the last hope he ever had. Brian knew better than to fuck some trick on a night that meant so much to Justin. There was nothing left to hold on to. But Justin didn't realize why Brian did what he did. Brian was trying to make it easier for Justin to let him go because Brian knew that he couldn't offer what Justin wanted from him. Justin wanted Brian to be romantic and declare his undying love to him. Again, he didn't realize that Brian did love him, even though Brian wouldn't admit it. He showed Justin through his actions. After all, actions do speak louder than words.

So Justin made his way to Brian's loft with thoughts invading his mind. When he approached the block where Brian's loft was, he saw the jeep. He gulped as he made his way to the entrance. Brian was home and Justin debated whether he should wait to pick up his things at a time when Brian wouldn't be there, but he decided to take a chance and go for it. What's the worst that could happen? It's not like they hated each other. He used the key Brian had given him which he intended to return to Brian, and made his way to Brian's door. He knocked first and waited. There was no answer so he used his key to let himself in. He called out Brian's name but there was no answer. He searched around for the older man and heard water running in the washroom. Brian was taking a shower. Justin took advantage of that and started to pack up his things.

Brian came out of the shower wearing a bath towel firmly wrapped around his waist. He spotted Justin standing by the kitchen and locked his eyes with the blonde's. Justin stared at Brian's frame. God he was beautiful. Why did he have to be taking a shower right when Justin decided to stop by? He gathered himself together and was the first to speak.

"I just came here to get my things and then... I'll... go," he said rather shakily.

Brian waited a moment before he replied, "Don't let me stop you."

Justin walked pass Brian and entered the washroom to retrieve his toiletries. Not being modest, Brian removed the towel from his waist to start dressing himself for work. Justin came out of the washroom and observed Brian's naked body. Even if it was a pleasant sight, he was frustrated at how Brian seemed careless about this situation.

"Jesus, Brian!"

"What? It's not like you haven't seen me naked before."

"I know, but this time it's... different," Justin whispered the last words.

Brian made no reply as he slipped on a jockstrap, similar to the one he wore the night he met Justin, which Justin noticed all too well. He didn't realize that he was watching Brian dress himself when Brian so thoughtfully reminded him of the reason why he was at the loft in the first place.

"Are you just going to watch me get dressed or are you going to pack up your things?" Brian asked a bit amused at how Justin was easy to seduce.

"Right... sorry."

"Sorry's bullshit," Brian smirked.

Justin made no reply as he went to the dresser to retrieve his socks and underwear. Brian was already there pulling out a pair of socks for himself when he saw Justin beside him. Brian grabbed hold of Justin's socks and underwear and passed them to him. Justin thought this was awkward... very awkward. He couldn't take the tension any longer.

"I can't do this. I'll come back later when you're not here," Justin said a bit angrily turning to leave.

"Why? You're here now... might as well finish what you came here for," Brian said expressionless.

"But fuck Brian, you're helping me pack... don't you see how awkward this is?"

"No."

"What?" Justin asked in disbelief, "It's amazing how your mind thinks. Anyway, I'll be out of your hair in a bit," Justin said as he stuffed his clothes in his duffel bag.

He finally packed all his things and turned to Brian.

"Here," he said as he handed Brian the key to the loft. Doing so, made everything seem final between them. Brian surprised Justin when he didn't take it.

"Keep it."

"Why? I don't live here anymore, take it."

"No... keep it," Brian insisted.

"Brian... why do you want me to keep it?" Justin asked a bit irritated.

"You never know," Brian mumbled.

"I never know what? That I'll come back here?" Justin laughed at the ridiculousness but thought about it nonetheless.

"Fine give me the fucking key," Brian said annoyed.

Justin for some reason didn't want to give it to him now.

"No it's fine; I'll keep it if that's what you want. Because everything always goes the way you want it," Justin regretted saying that last part.

Brian fired back instantly.

"Is it? Why don't you think things over for a change and realize what you're saying you little shit!"

Justin was offended by Brian's bluntness.

"Things have always been your way, Brian!"

"Really?" Brian waited for Justin to reply because he was in no way finished with the blond.

"Yes, really," Justin said sure of himself.

"Well tell me this... who made up the rules to our arrangement or whateverthefuck you want to call it? Who broke them? Who cheated?" Brian threw the words to Justin. Justin was taken aback and felt defenceless. Brian was right.

"You've always done what you wanted to do regardless of the consequences. I've never stopped you. So don't give me this things-always-go-my-way bullshit!"

"Brian..."

"Don't... just go back to Ian because he's the one who can give you everything YOU WANT. Because it's always about what you want!" Brian returned Justin's words.

Justin never realized Brian's perspective and was at a loss for words. Brian was right... again.

"Brian," Justin tried again, "when we were together I felt like I was in this relationship alone. You completely shut yourself off. I felt like you didn't care at all. You never told me that you loved me. You had walls surround you... I felt lost."

"See you keep forgetting that we were simply together because we wanted to be not because there are locks on our doors. I might not have told you how I feel about you, but I showed you. I helped you heal from the bashing. I fucking comforted you when you were having nightmares and I held your hand when it was sore. I got you a fucking computer for your art because I felt so helpless that I had to do something to alleviate the guilt I felt every time I saw something that triggered the memory of that awful night... Just the sight of you when you were recovering made me emotionally unstable. I showed up at your prom and danced with you because... because I care about you! I even paid for your tuition because I want you to succeed and to pursue what you love! Do you think I would do all these things if I didn't give a shit about you? I'm sorry if I didn't include flowers and pick nicks in the mix of it all. Everything I've ever done has been for you because... I care about you," Brian finished.

Justin stood frozen taking in all that Brian said.

"Why did you fuck Rage in the back room at the party? You couldn't keep your pants up for only that night? A night that you prepared for Michael and I?"

"I knew you were leaving," Justin noticed that Brian left ‘leaving me' out of his speech, "so I made it easier for you by giving you the push that you needed," Brian admitted.

"Is that what you wanted?"

"Does it matter?"

"Yes it matters, Brian! But you're so hell bent on hiding your feelings from me that I never know what you truly want. I never know if we're on the same page! If you still wanted me you would have done things differently."

"Ok, how's this... I do want you Justin. I want you in my bed, your lips on mine, my hands holding your face close to mine, your breathe on my skin, my fingers swiping through your hair... because I want you. Because I... I... care about you." Brian looked down feeling vulnerable to admitting his feelings and Justin knew that. He slowly walked up to Brian and cupped his face with his hands.

"Why didn't you say so? Brian... if you would just open yourself to me... open your heart, things could be so much easier... better... for the both of us," Justin spoke softly. Brian held on to Justin's hands for a moment and then brushed them off.

"I know it would have made things easier, but that's not who I am. All my life I've had to keep my feelings to myself because my idiot parents didn't care about how I felt and I didn't want to displease my father or I'd be used as a punching bag. It was hard for me to trust anyone or to open myself up. I kept to myself so that I wouldn't get hurt because I was hurt by people who I thought were supposed to love me... and I didn't want to go through that again. My parents had a hateful marriage which is why I'm unable to commit to a relationship of my own. I was convinced that no one could love me for myself so I never bothered to open myself up to anyone... until you came along and still, it was/is hard. I'm sorry if I wasn't good enough for you because you deserve everything in a partner," Brian's voice was trembling.

"Oh Brian... I've loved you since the night I met you. You're opening yourself up to me now... don't you see? You doing so, I know more about you and I'm able to base my decisions on what I know now because I know how you feel."

"Even if you succeeded in tearing down a bit of my walls, all of if was for nothing because now we're not," he hesitated, "together anymore and I'm not going through all that again."

"But isn't it worth it? Aren't ‘we' worth it?" Justin said hopefully.

"What about Ian?"

Justin smiled at Brian's lame attempt at pretending that he didn't know Ethan's name.

"Forget Ethan... this moment right now is what's important. You're finally communicating with me and things are clearing up. I want to hold on to that... for you, for us," Justin said so softly that Brian smiled.

"I've been waiting for this conversation... for this moment, and now I want to start over. I want a fresh start... with you."

"Justin I don't want to tie you down by starting a relationship," Brian hated that word but said it anyway; "you're young and should be experiencing everything in life."

Justin realized that Brian did care for him a lot more than he let on.

"But Brian I don't want anyone else but you."

"Justin..."

Justin held on to Brian as Brian instinctively placed his arms around Justin.

"Brian, tell me, what do you want?"

"I want you to be happy," Brian revealed.

"Well a big part of my happiness has to do with you, but just be open with me Brian. Promise?"

Brian hesitated before he answered because everyone knows that Brian keeps his promises.

"I promise I'll try," he said quietly and then smiled.

Justin kicked his duffel bag aside and escorted Brian to the bedroom. They stood face to face before the bed. They looked in each other's eyes and found comfort. Justin slowly lifted his hand and passed his fingers on Brian's luscious lips before he kissed them softly. As they kissed, Justin slowly removed the white wife beater which Brian had only managed to put on himself while he was in the process of getting dressed for work earlier on. Brian didn't care about work at the moment; he was allowed to be late. If not, he'll remind Vance how much the agency's success is based on his talent. Brian hesitated no further and removed Justin's clothing at the same pace. Brian started to kiss and nibble at Justin's neck as Justin undid Brian's pants. Both completely naked now, Justin dragged Brian on top of him as they lay on the bed. Both of Brian's hands were on either side of Justin's face holding him steady as he kissed Justin like it was for the first time. Then Brian broke the kiss and just stared down at Justin's crystal blue eyes. He passed his finger along Justin's lip and played with his hair slowly. Justin just wrapped his arms around Brian and let him do what he needed to do. As Justin looked into Brian's eyes, he saw something clearly for the first time... it was love. Sure, Justin thought at some point that Brian cared for him, but love him? Now? Brian kissed him slowly but passionately. He then started to kiss along Justin's jaw line and neck. Justin closed his eyes at the feeling of Brian's mouth and tongue on his skin. Then, Brian stopped and straddled Justin's legs as he sat upon them. He slowly started to stroke Justin's erection like he had done on their first time. But this time, Justin was not that naïve 17 year old boy Brian picked up two years ago... he was his lover... his partner. Justin pulled Brian's face towards him to kiss him hard as Brian kept on stroking. Justin broke the kiss to retrieve a condom and then rolled it onto Brian's dick. Brian opened the tube of KY lubricant and applied some to Justin's awaiting hole and to his dick. Justin placed his legs on Brian's shoulders and then Brian slowly entered Justin's warm tight tunnel.

"I want you to always remember this moment. So that no matter who you're ever with... I'll always be there," Justin said clearly. Brian just smiled at the memory and of having his own words recited back to him. It was Justin's way of reassuring Brian that he will always be by his side for better or for worst. Brian was now fully implanted into Justin's ass and started pumping at a steady pace. Their fingers entwined as Brian's face was a mere inch from Justin's... their eyes never leaving each other. Justin came with Brian never having to touch his dick because Brian's intense stare was enough to get him off. Brian came at the same time too and never tore his eyes away from Justin. He was in complete ecstasy.

"I love you," Brian spoke in a trembling voice. Justin remembered when Brian said those words on their first time and wondered if it was just a meaningless déjà vu, but he doubted it this time.

"And I mean it this time," Brian had a half smile as he said this.

"And I love you... don't ever doubt that."

Brian smiled and then Justin untangled himself from Brian and headed for the washroom. Justin observed the confused look on his lover's face as Brian followed him.

"You have to go to work and I have to go to... Ethan, and explain myself."

Brian knew that Justin had to do this so they both took a shower and then went their separate ways.

Justin arrived to Ethan's apartment and slowly walked through the door. Ethan was playing his violin near the window. Ethan didn't see Justin so the blond approached him and slowly patted him on the shoulder.

"Justin!" Ethan said startled. He put his violin down and then held Justin in his arms and attempted to kiss him, but Justin pulled himself away from Ethan. Ethan frowned in wonder at Justin's cold manner.

"What's wrong?" Ethan asked concerned.

Deciding that it was best to be blunt, he didn't hesitate.

"I've come to say that I can't do this... that I can't be with you," Justin said not meeting his eyes.

"Why?" Ethan said rather disheartened, "or do I already know why?" he said not caring how he sounded.

"Ethan..."

"You went back to Brian after everything he put you through?" Ethan let his anger surface.

"It's nothing more than I put him through. You don't know Brian, Ethan. There's a reason he does the things that he does."

"So that's an excuse to jeopardize your happiness?"

"You don't understand," Justin said still not meeting his eyes.

"Then make me understand. Tell me what makes the great Brian Kinney worth it!"

Just lifted his eyes to meet Ethan's and stared with such intensity as he said,

"It's always going to be Brian for me. He's always going to be a part of my life just like I'm going to be a part of his. He needs me just as much as I need him. You might not believe that, but I know NOW that he does. I've loved him from the start and I always will. Sure, he has flaws, but he's worth it. He's complicated... we're complicated, but it's a roller coaster ride that I'd ride endlessly. It wouldn't be fair to you if we were together and my heart didn't belong to you or if I was in love with someone else. So that's why I'm here."

Despite how Ethan felt, he knew that Justin was right. Therefore, he decided to let him go on a positive note.

"Well... I can't argue with love. Go to him, Justin. Just know one thing... he's lucky to have you."

"And I'm lucky to have him," Justin said as he headed for the door. He turned around and gave one last glance to Ethan.

"I hope you find in Brian what you found in me because I seemed to make you happy."

"Not everything is roses, chocolate, and romance. A relationship isn't perfect, only the feeling of love shared between two people is... and I know that what Brian and I share is real. Goodbye, Ethan."

Justin didn't say ‘later' like he does with Brian because it's never goodbye with him, but always later. With Ethan... it was goodbye.

"Take care of yourself," Ethan said in finality.

"You too," Justin said as he walked out the door and left.

 Justin took a walk to clear his head. His conversation with Ethan went better than he thought, but he was glad that he got that over with. He thought about Brian and how things would be different with them this time, and he smiled to himself.

 He made his way to Vanguard. When he got there, he headed for Brian's office. Brian's office door was closed, but he could see his shape through the blurry windows. He knocked on the door and walked in. Brian smiled at Justin and the blond smiled back. He got up, walked around his desk, and got face to face with Justin as he closed the door and pressed Justin to it. He held the blond in his arms and gave him a chaste kiss.

"Did everything go accordingly with Ethan?"

"Yes."

"So you're all mine then?"

"I was always yours, Brian... from the start," Justin said smilingly but sincerely.

 Brian held Justin's head with both of his hands as he pressed his body on Justin and stared into those blue orbs.

"I promise I'll try," Brian repeated and then kissed Justin profoundly.

Justin could tell by Brian's kiss that Brian meant every word. ‘Give me the stars, give me the moon' Justin wouldn't want the world because having Brian's heart was much more than anything else anyone had to offer.


Submitted: August 13, 2007

© Copyright 2023 Midriffkitty. All rights reserved.

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