One moment

One moment One moment

Status: Finished

Genre: Erotica

Details

Status: Finished

Genre: Erotica

Summary

Damon couldn't remember his wife but his body did. Driven by lust and passion he just can't seem to stop the need to be with her. His head a mess of right and wrong, of lust and restraint. Trying desperately to remember the life he had, the woman he loved and the future he lost. Everything would be easier if his cock stopped trying to interfere with their conversations. How could he remember loving her when his primal needs took over the instant he saw her? Callie wanted her husband back. The man whom loved every inch of her and granted her every desire. Callie needed to let go of the man she still heart heartbreakingly loved and move on. Callie needed to stop letting him rule her heart and her body but what if one time he remembered? What if she pushed the right button and all his memories came back? How do you even let go of a man whose body still loved you, still knew every inch of you even if he consciously didn't? Could you turn your back on a passion so fierce and so blatantly still there?

Summary

Damon couldn't remember his wife but his body did. Driven by lust and passion he just can't seem to stop the need to be with her. His head a mess of right and wrong, of lust and restraint. Trying desperately to remember the life he had, the woman he loved and the future he lost. Everything would be easier if his cock stopped trying to interfere with their conversations. How could he remember loving her when his primal needs took over the instant he saw her?

Callie wanted her husband back. The man whom loved every inch of her and granted her every desire. Callie needed to let go of the man she still heart heartbreakingly loved and move on. Callie needed to stop letting him rule her heart and her body but what if one time he remembered? What if she pushed the right button and all his memories came back? How do you even let go of a man whose body still loved you, still knew every inch of you even if he consciously didn't? Could you turn your back on a passion so fierce and so blatantly still there?









Chapter1 (v.1) - One moment

Author Chapter Note

Here are A few sample chapters of the current erotica/contemporary romance novel I'm working on. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: August 26, 2013

Reads: 1571

Comments: 4

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Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: August 26, 2013

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CHAPTER ONE.

 

‘Tis better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.

Alfred Lord Tennyson

 

 

One day he will remember.  He’ll remember me, the love we shared and the future we were meant to have. Of course it’s not his fault; retrograde amnesia ripped all memories of us from him. Five years of his life taken because of a stupid accident. Our whole world changed. We tried but how can you expect a man to love you as he once did when to him you’re a complete stranger? Hell, half the time he isn’t even really sure who he is anymore. It was easier to leave and let him rebuild his life, his personality and his future. The stress and the tension were unhealthy to say the least.

 

 

I try to ignore the overwhelming lust I feel when I see him across the room, my god he was a sight to behold. Tall, toned with dark hair and eyes the colour of emeralds. The suit wasn’t helping either. What is it with men in suits? Christ, it just does something to them. I sipped my drink and tried to engage in the conversation I was part of until he made his entrance to the party. I smiled and laughed at all the correct times but my mind was too preoccupied to actually understand the conversation. That man, Damon; he was my husband and nothing I did or said could get him to remember, short of jumping on him but I’d been advised that would be classed as rape. Damn it, why did he have to be so handsome? Why the hell couldn’t he remember that he loved me and not that skank on his arm? Ok, she’s not really a skank and it really isn’t her fault that he remembered an old college sweetheart instead of the actual love of his life. Well she wasn’t exactly going to say no to the advances of a man so beautiful even the gods would weep, was she?

 

 

If only I could, did, said...that’s all I’m left with now, well that and the bittersweet memories. I need air, I need to get out of this stupid party and collect myself. I excuse myself and head to the veranda in the hope to find enough peace to settle my thoughts. The cool night air knocked some much needed sense into me.

“Have you tried to cake?” His voice sound like silk, it was a voice I had longed to hear for months and that was what he had to say? Have I tried the cake? Seriously?! I mean what the fuck? I resisted the urge to turn around and gazed out at the sea instead, I couldn’t trust myself this close to him.

“No, not yet.” My voice barely a whisper; not trusting itself to not scream expletives or declare my love for him.

“You should, its chocolate.” I heard his fork scratch the plate and closed my eyes, willing him to go away and take that intoxicating scent of his with him. I breathed deep and allowed my memories to take me to a place I really didn’t want to go.

“It reminds me of something.” He spoke again. His nonchalant tone was beginning to get to me. How dare he be so carefree and talk to me like I was just an acquaintance? I was his god damned wife. Anger began to rear its ugly head and it took all my strength to keep it inside.

“Really?” I matched his tone and continued to look forward.

 

 

I felt him shift closer to me and I could feel the body heat radiating from him like poison. Did he have any idea how painful it was to have him this close to me? I glanced sideways and watched him spear a piece of cake. Before I had a chance to react he had placed it to my lips. I opened my mouth slowly as his eyes stared intensely into mine. I closed my mouth around the piece and removed it from the fork. He continued to watch as I tasted the stupid cake, hold on, fuck I know this cake...

“We had it at our wedding.” His words were quiet, I almost didn’t hear them. My jaw all but dropped, I managed to keep it closed with the fear of the chocolate cake falling out. I swallowed as quickly as I could.

“What did you just say?” My eyes were still wide in shock and my heart raced. I forced myself to calm down, maybe someone had told him it was the cake we had, hell half the people here were guests at our wedding.

“It’s the same cake we had on our wedding day.” He stepped closer and his lips were dangerously close to mine. White hot fire shot through my body and it betrayed my cautious mind by leaning in. I wanted to run away, I wanted to scream and cry but I couldn’t move. Frozen by fear, hope and love.

 

 

Neither of us spoke or moved for what felt like an eternity. The tension was unbearably hot and dangerous.

“As soon as I took a bite, I knew I’d had it before. Then Toby mentioned the wedding-” He was still speaking but I no longer heard words, I heard my heart breaking and my hope shattering on the cold hard floor. I stepped away abruptly and broke the spell. He looked at my wide eyes; I shook my head and tried desperately to stop the tears from falling.

“I thought; hell I don’t know what I thought. I guess I hoped you’d remembered. I have to go.” I couldn’t stop the heartache from reaching my voice. I turned as the first tear fell. My arm was pulled softly as he spun me around to face him. His face fixed with a look I hadn’t seen in a long time, anger and lust all mixed into one stare. I used to get that look when we would fight or I pushed his buttons to goad him into a bit of rough.

“I do remember Callie, I do. Just it’s confusing, overwhelming and frustrating. I don’t remember all the specifics, hell I only really remember feelings and they all but knocked the wind out of me. I felt like my heart was about to explode and I couldn’t figure out why. Then I saw you out here now and then I saw you in that beautiful white dress, the way it hugged you in all the right places and flowed so delicately when you moved. I could have died right there in the door way, I watched you out here on your own for ages, just taking in your beauty and I felt like the happiest man alive.” He spoke with such emotion, such love that I would have given anything to wrap my arms around him. But what’s one moment in a lifetime? What’s one sweet kiss in a world filled with love? What’s one scream when everyone’s screaming? It was nothing, just one memory.

 

 

I took my arm back and shook my head whilst backing away from him,

“No, you don’t get to do this. You don’t get to give me hope only to take it away. Remembering one moment isn’t enough to rebuild our lives.” I turned my back before I could see the reaction on his face; I couldn’t deal with his pain as well as my own. My feet felt like I was walking through wet cement; they disagreed with my desire to get away. I heard him moving behind me and resisted the urge to stop and turn back.

“Maybe it isn’t. But I need this.” He pulled my arm more forcefully this time, my body fell against his and his lips pressed against mine. I was lost in the moment and parted my mouth as his tongue begged to enter. God how I missed his kiss. His soft lips demanding passion, his tongue exploring at its own leisure and his hands, oh god those hands. The plate had been placed on the wall and both hands teased my back before one took a handful of hair and guided us backwards. I felt the cold wall against my shoulders and relished at the caring thought of his hand protecting my head, wouldn’t want both us with amnesia, would we?

 

 

Lost in the moment my mind begged to flee, to run and hide from this man and my desires. ‘You’ll get your heart broken’ it told me. My thoughts ceased as he trailed kisses down my jaw and onto my neck; he knew my sensitive spots and gently nibbled and licked his way to my ear.

“Do you remember what happened on the veranda at our wedding?” his hot breath sent shivers through my body, his lips softly clamped my ear and he sucked it gently.

“Yes.” My voice breathy and full of desire. His fingers traced their way down my torso and stopped at the hem of my dress, my breath caught at the sensation of skin on skin as his hand gripped my thigh,

“Do you remember what I did to you?” his hand slid up my thigh and his fingers lingered over the lace of my thong, Christ. I remembered far too well what he did. I pulled his head from my neck and kissed him with as much force I could muster. I ran my fingers down his firm chest and squeezed his pecks. I dragged my nails down further and heard him groan as I reached his belt. He stopped kissing me as I undone his belt and rested his forehead against mine. His breathing turned long and deep as I reached my hand down. I freed his cock and wrapped my fingers around the wide shaft, Jesus I swear it’s bigger than I remember and he was never small to start with. A moan escaped my lips as his fingers delved inside the lace and ran their way down my now wet lips, spreading them apart and pressing deeper as he reached my hole. I gasped as they were thrust inside me; he pressed his body against mine to stop my knees buckling. His thumb rubbed my clit and his fingers found my g-spot, he was the only man ever to know what to do with it and he had saved that little gem for our wedding night. Fire shot through my body as the pleasure built, I had to be quiet, I had to control myself but nothing about this was down to me. He knew what to do and smothered my mouth with his as he felt my muscles clamp around him, my body shook and moans tried to escape. I let go of his cock, unable to focus on anything other than what I was feeling, his lips left mine for moment.

“Let it go baby, I want you to cum for me like you did that night.” his voice was rough and low. He upped his game and my whole body gave in. In that moment I was his. I felt the warm cum gush down my legs, his lips pressed against mine to stifle my cries as he continued his assault. His arm wrapped around me as he held me up. I heard the sound of his fingers squelching as another wave tore through me, he wouldn’t let up and I all but blacked out the third time. I felt him smile against my lips, he kissed them softly and pulled his fingers out gently, he rubbed my clit one last time causing my hips to buck into him. My eyes stayed closed as I felt his fingers press against my lips, I opened my mouth and sucked on them, I felt his tongue help me suck the bitter sweet nectar.

 

 

I removed my hand from his neck and moved it back down to his throbbing cock, it was the hardest I had ever felt it. I groaned as I tried to wrap my fingers around it.

“You don’t have to do this. I just wanted you to know that I might not remember a lot of our relationship but I remembered that. I remembered the love I felt that moment on the veranda when you completely let go and gave yourself to me. I just wanted to thank you.” his head rested against mine as he struggled to contain his groans as he spoke.

“I know this is just one moment in many but it’s something. It’s more than I hoped after all this time. Let me show you my gratitude, please?” I looked up into his eyes and kissed him lightly. I lowered myself to my knees and looked up at him again,

“Shit.” He groaned then looked down at me, “I fucking love it when you look up at me like that, all innocent.” We both knew I was about as far from innocent as you could get, especially with him. I smiled sweetly then ever so softly licked the drop of pre-cum escaping from the head. I loved his cock, I know it’s a strange thing to be in awe of but I swear it’s the most beautiful one I’ve ever seen. I was a second away from taking him in my mouth when we heard voices travelling towards the veranda. Damon quickly pulled me to my feet and put his raging hard on away. It was more difficult then he made it look, I’m sure. I was promptly guided down some steps and around the corner out of sight.

 

 

We stood silently begging the people to leave.

“Have you seen Callie?” Shit, it was Alex; my date for the night. God he can’t see me like this. Damon must have seen the fear in my eyes, he soothed me with a gentle kiss then handed me a napkin. I looked at it, wondering where it had come from. He grinned and mouthed the word ‘cake’. Of course, my brain was still in post orgasmic bliss, obviously. I wiped myself dry and rearranged myself. Hoping to god that my dress wasn’t wet. I felt it hug my body and sighed in relief, it was dry. Damon motioned me under the light. I stood and slowly turned around, he smiled, nodded and did the ok sign with his fingers. I looked longingly at them, not long ago they were buried deep inside me but I missed them already. He stepped towards me and smoothed my hair down then kissed the top of my head.

“This isn’t over.” He whispered then softly pushed me in the direction of the stairs. I took a step and looked back; he smiled and headed off in the other direction. My heart swelled with far too many emotions to think about right now.

 

 

I arrived at the top of the steps to find Alex and another gentleman chatting. He smiled when he saw me, I forced one back.

“Are you ok? You look a little flushed.” He touched my cheek gently; concern etched the corner of his eyes.

“I don’t feel very well. I think I might head home, do you mind?”

“Of course not, do you want me to come with you?”

“No, it’s ok. You enjoy the party. I’ll see you soon.” I avoided his lips as he went in for a kiss and briefly met his cheek with my lips. How could I kiss him knowing where they’d just been?

 

As I walked through the party towards the entrance I saw Damon reappear next to her, my heart constricted in pain. He kissed her cheek dutifully and joined in the conversation before glancing over to me, I held his gaze and hoped the heartache I was feeling didn’t show in my eyes. He smiled briefly then turned back to the conversation. I said my goodbyes to a few friends and made it through the doors as the first tear fell. I cursed myself for being an emotional wreck, I’d dealt with him leaving me months ago, I had to because nothing I could do would make him change his mind. He was sorry but he didn’t remember me, he didn’t love me and he wished me a happy life. It sounds cold hearted but if you had seen the conflict and pain in his face then you would have known it wasn’t an easy decision for him to make. Of course knowing that didn’t make my life any easier.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER TWO.

 

‘I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,

in secret, between the shadow and the soul.’

 Pablo Neruda

 

I hadn’t wanted to see the hurt in Callie's eyes as I shared my recent memory with her. I probably shouldn’t have shown her what I remembered but I guess I let my emotions get the better of me and my desire won over compassion. I’d seen her at the party and my heart felt conflicted, she looked stunning tonight, her black dress hugged her toned body like a second skin, her dark hair fell across her slender shoulders towards her tiny waist and her dark eyes shone brightly until she noticed I’d arrived at the party then the light faded to be replaced by a dark soulful sadness. That was my fault, well not exactly all mine. I’d have given anything to remember her, to remember the love we had that others had told me about. It sounded intense, crazy and beautiful but the last five years of my life were gone and I only remembered Lottie, a girl I’d apparently finished with years ago. I remembered loving her and being with her, not Callie and certainly not marrying her. It all sounded absurd and wrong. My friends begged me to try and remember, they spent hours showing me pictures of my life with Callie and telling me how perfect we were together and when that didn’t work they resorted to telling me why I left Lottie all those years ago, she’d cheated on me. But nothing could change my feelings; they told me I loved Lottie. She welcomed me back to her with open arms and it felt right. I’d walked out on Callie, not because she deserved the pain but because I just couldn’t ignore my love.

 

Its funny how something so small and insignificant could trigger a long lost memory I’d given up hope on ever finding again. That stupid bloody chocolate cake, I almost thought it had been an intentional act by my friends but they all seemed very casual about the whole thing. Toby brushed my query aside by quickly stating it was the same as our wedding cake then changed the subject but my mind locked on to something and a horrifically intense flashback took hold of me. I felt overwhelmed by love and passion for Callie, I saw her for the first time in her wedding dress. The dress she wore for me, for our love. God, I saw her on the veranda and then I saw what I did to her to show her how much I loved her. I remembered saving that little trick for our wedding night, a whole year of not pressing that button despite every fibre of my being telling me too. I shouldn’t have done that tonight, I shouldn’t have gone out there and spoken to her. Christ I’m an idiot, a sex crazed twat.

 

I sat on the bed and ran my fingers through my hair. I wish her face would stop haunting me. I wish I could stop thinking about her. Lottie came in from the bathroom in a t-shirt that barely covered her ass, god she was hot but I couldn’t stop seeing Callie in that shirt, seeing her innocent eyes looking at me; hiding the secret dark side that only I brought out. Fuck this. My heart pumped and agitation threatened to overcome me.

“Get over here, now.” I barely recognised my own voice; I’d never used this tone with Lottie before. She was a little too vanilla to be ordered around but humoured me by walking over and standing between my legs.

“Are you ok?” she ran her fingers through my hair, I grabbed her wrists and stood, I turned us and flung her onto the bed. I knelt between her legs and pulled her pants down a little rougher than either of us would have liked. Her eyes were wide as she watched me bite her thighs; I looked up and forced myself to take things down a notch. I licked the spot I’d previously bitten and then softly kissed it. I felt her body relax and a moan escaped her mouth. I loved her and she didn’t deserve the man I was at this moment.

 

 

I trailed kisses up towards her lips, they were glistening in anticipation. I licked up her slit and parted her lips with my fingers, I inhaled deeply in the hope her scent would erase all traces of Callie from my mind. I probed her swollen clit as her hands pressed my head closer. I continued my assault until she was screaming my name and begging me not to stop. I gave one final suck then buried my fingers deep inside her as I moved up past her heaving breasts and pressed my mouth against her eager lips, her tongue delved straight in as she panted. Her muscles tightened around my fingers as she swore against my lips. Her body writhed under me as I pulled down my boxers. God I needed to be inside her, I needed to feel her around me. I moved my fingers and quickly replaced them with my throbbing cock drawing a gasp from Lottie. I placed her legs over my shoulders and thrust hard, forcing myself in as deep as I could. Her legs pushed against me until I released them a few thrusts later. She wrapped them around my hips and pressed her feet against my ass, drawing me in closer. I wanted to fuck away my memories. I needed to focus on her, on now. I slowed my pace to how she preferred, Lottie wasn’t one for rough fun. It had never bothered me before, I’d never pushed for more or really desired it but something about my memories of Callie woke the animal in me. The beast that had been caged and it needed more. It needed more than making love and romance. God it wanted to fuck like its life depended on it, to go hard, deep and fast without worrying or caring about the consequences. Callie provoked thoughts of fucking, of goading the beast till it bit back and actually enjoying it, on both sides. Hell I’m almost certain she encouraged it.

 

 

I felt the familiar tingling and tightening of my balls, I upped the speed of my thrusts and held on to her as I felt her convulse around me. Fuck, I felt the white hot heat shoot up my cock and groaned as I came. I felt Lottie stiffen underneath me and try to move as the final wave thrust into her. Fuck why is she angry? Why is she pushing me off her? I slipped out and rolled off. She was angry but for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why? Maybe I’d been a little too rough to start with but I thought I’d rectified that.

“You have no idea what just happened, do you?” She shouted, tears leaked down her cheeks. I sat up and tried to reach out to her but she moved.

“Lottie, I’m sorry.” I was sorry even if I hadn’t a clue as to why. She laughed nastily and wiped her eyes,

“Christ, this is a joke.” She mumbled then glared at me, “You moaned her name when you came.” Holy fucking shit. I jumped up and went to her; I held her firmly by the shoulders and forced her to look at me,

“Lottie, I love you. I’m so sorry; nothing I can say will make any of this better. I guess things just got a little messed up in my head. I swear it doesn’t mean anything.” How could I make her believe my apology when I was as confused as she was?

“Do you remember something?” she’d calmed a little now but anger still haunted her eyes,

“Sort of, I had a flashback. It was our wedding day. I’m sorry. I guess it fucked with my head a little but I swear nothing’s changed. I love you Lottie. More than anything.” God I can’t have this argument right now. It’s too much for my idiotic brain to handle. 

 

I don’t know whether Lottie genuinely believed me or just chose to leave the matter alone but she didn’t push any further. I lay on top of the covers and stared at the ceiling, this wasn’t fair on anyone. I was single handily fucking up everyone’s lives because I couldn’t control myself around Callie and couldn’t remember enough to free Lottie. I loved Lottie, this I was certain but the memory of my wedding with Callie stirred a larger, more intense feeling of love. Something I hadn’t ever felt before. I couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe everyone was right, Callie was the love of my life but it was just one memory, one feeling and I couldn’t commit to her knowing that maybe that was all we were getting; that one little moment in a whole lifetime of moments wasn’t enough to promise Callie my love. Sure I felt something towards her but it was a fleeting feeling, unsubstantial in the grand scheme of things. This had to end now. I need time to figure out my god damn head and I owe it to Lottie to make things work, she didn’t have to take me back but she did. She loved me even though years had passed and time had changed us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER THREE.

 

Love is an untamed force. When we try to control it, it destroys us. When we try to imprison it, it enslaves us. When we try to understand it, it leaves us feeling lost and confused.

 Paulo Coelho

 

 

Last night was a mistake, a horrifically beautiful mistake. I’ve hardly slept with all the thoughts going through my mind, he remembered our wedding day, well some of it. He remembers loving me that day and what he did to me on the veranda; the beautiful moment when I came harder than ever before. But it was just one memory, wasn’t it? I fooled myself for half the night thinking it meant something, we were back on track and our lives would be entwined again. I spent the other half sobbing, feeling used and broken hearted all over again; we were still in the same place we were when he first woke up. Nothing had really changed; all that really happened was a quick finger fuck after a few drinks and some chocolate cake. I just wanted Damon back; I wanted my husband back in my bed where he belonged, the thought of him fucking that silly girl made me feel sick, his hands on her skin, his fingers inside her and his cock, God I don’t even want to think about that.

 

 

I forced myself out of bed and rubbed my tired eyes. Pulling on some shorts and a vest I made my way to the kitchen. I need caffeine. Right now. I set up the coffee maker and stared in to the abyss, ok maybe not the actual abyss but it felt like it. A noise startled me, what the hell was that? I stood still and tried to figure out what was going on. ‘Knock, knock’ oh, it was the door. I glanced at the clock, it was early. Most people knew better then to wake me up. I peered through the peep hole and stepped back, holding my breath in the hope she wouldn’t know I was in. It was Lottie, stupid skanky Lottie, the girl that got to spend the night with my husband; the girl he remembered instead of me. Sure she was pretty in a girl next door sort of way, I wouldn’t say she stood out or made heads turn but I’m bias so I probably wouldn’t notice if she did.

“Callie? I know you’re in there. You’re cars in the driveway.” She shouted and banged again. I really should start using the garage. I took a deep breath and started opening the door; she shoved it open further and pushed her way in. Anger tainted her eyes and I swear steam almost came out of her ears.

“Can I help you?” I tried desperately to sound calm and not guilty. After all I was technically the other woman. She glared at me for a long time; I started to feel nervous and prayed it didn’t show on my face.

“What did you say to Damon last night? I know you spoke with him.” Her tone was so bitter I swear she was spitting acid. I took too long to answer I guess because she threw her arms up in the air and made a frustrated sort of gurgle.

“Do you know what he did last night? He called out your fucking name.” She screamed, I fought the smug grin that threatened to take over my face. It was a small victory but I’d gladly take it. It over shone the sting of knowing he went home and fucked her.

“I have no control over what he says or does. If he did that then maybe you should be discussing this with him and not me. I can’t help you.” I moved towards the door and hoped she’d take the hint.

“I did ask him, and you know what he said? He said he remembered you, he remembered your stupid wedding day of all days. Clearly seeing you sparked some sort of flash back.” She walked towards the open door then glared at me, “Stay the hell away from him. He’s happier with me then he ever was with you, why do you think he remembered me and not you?” bitch, I slammed the door and smiled a little when I felt it make contact with her on the way out.

 

 

I recovered from my early morning visit by going for a run; it soothed my mind and cleared away my scattered thoughts. Breathing heavily I stopped to do some cool down stretches on the corner of my street. I stretched my leg and casually looked towards my house, someone was sitting on the front steps; a casual pose, relaxed and leaning on his knees. It was definitely a ‘he’. I squinted in an effort to see more. I knew that figure, all too well. My heart skipped a beat as I realised it was Damon. I forced myself to get a grip and stop acting like a soppy fool. He was probably just here to tell me exactly what Lottie had. My heart sank a little at that thought, at least it couldn’t get broken if it was already in pieces. I strolled down the street and watched as he rose when he saw me. Why couldn’t he have come when I didn’t look all sweaty and red from running? I desperately hoped I didn’t look at bad as I knew I did. A lazy grin spread across his face as I got closer, I watched his gaze drop down to the sweat dripping between my cleavage and cursed my nipples for responding to his stare. Traitors. I watched cautiously as his eyes roamed my body and smiled a little when I saw a slight bulge appear in his jeans. His eyes finally looked up and locked onto mine. Desire flicked through them making them appear darker. As soon as I looked in his eyes, I was his. Always. Damn it. I forced myself to look away.

 

 

I brushed past him in an attempt to get to the door, He pulled me quickly into him and pressed his hard on against my back. I shivered and begged my body not to respond to him, not again. One hand gripped my waist whilst the other moved my hair from my neck, I felt his hot breath against my ear and couldn’t help but press myself closer against him, rising up on my toes a little to rub my ass against his bulge. His breath caught in his throat and he momentarily froze whilst I ground against the length of him. He held me tighter and licked a bead of sweat running down my neck.

“We should go inside before your neighbours see more than they should.” His lips brushed my neck as he spoke and he nibbled gently before moving forward, forcing us towards the door.

“It wouldn’t be anything they haven’t seen before.” I regretted speaking as soon as he stopped moving, he wouldn’t know that. Maybe the new him wasn’t too keen on people seeing us.

“Really? I hope we gave them a good show.” I knew he was grinning without even turning to see. He moved us forward again and I opened the door. We stumbled through and I was promptly spun around and pressed against it.

 

 

I barely had time to register the intensity in his eyes before his kissed me, full force and hungry. His tongue snaked into my mouth and started its unrelenting assault against mine. His hands urgently pulling my sports bra up so he could get to my flesh. I gasped as he pinched a nipple and relished in the urgency of his touch. I pulled away briefly and undone his belt

“We really shouldn’t be doing this.” I breathed as I pulled his trousers and boxers down releasing his hard and glistening cock. He pulled me into him and ground himself against me, an involuntary moan escaped me.

“Yeah, it’s a really bad idea.” He licked my nipple and tweaked the other. I arched into him and fumbled frantically to get my leggings off. He left his assault and helped me get them off, much more forceful than I had been prepared for; my knees buckled and I landed in front of him. He looked down with an evil glint in his eyes. He’d done that to me before; it was one of his favourite things to do when he was feeling mischievous.

“Do you think you’ll ever be able to remember something that isn’t sex related?” I asked as I ran my fingers over his length.

“Not right now.” He grinned and wrapped his fingers through my hair pulling my mouth towards him. I licked the drop of pre-cum from the head then took him in my mouth, I’d forgotten how hard it was to fit him in. But remembered how good it felt when I did. He filled my mouth completely and thrust forward in an attempt to own my throat. Tears threatened to sting my eyes and he drove forward, I attempted to relax my gag reflex and allow him to fuck my throat. Thankfully my throat welcomed him with little resistance and he hissed at his sudden entrance. His fingers clenched tighter as he thrust faster, harder, deeper. He pulled out and allowed me to breathe before shoving his cock back in, the force all but choked me. I reached out my tongue and licked his tightening balls. His breathing turned rapid and the groans became louder and drawn out.

“Fuck.” He pulled out and held me still, his fingers digging into my scalp and his eyes closed. He’d barely gained his composure when he dropped to his knees and kissed me deeply whilst freeing my ankles from the restraint of my leggings.

 

 

Our kisses elicited moans and his hands worked to remove my bra completely. He broke the kiss and gazed at my body willingly giving itself to him.

“You’re more stunning than I remember.” He murmured and pulled me onto his lap, he cock nestled between my waiting lips. I rubbed myself against him as I removed his top. His hands gripped my waist moving me faster as he matched my thrusts. His cock head unashamedly bashing my clit. I felt the deliciously hot wave start to flow through me as I reached my peak. I moaned loudly and my muscles convulsed. They had barely recovered when he lifted me and pushed himself inside me. Oh fuck, I moaned from the sudden pain. Despite being wetter than ever, his size still took some getting used to. He waited a moment for my walls to mould themselves around him before he trust as deep as he could. His cock rubbing my g-spot as he harshly ground himself into me. Hardly a minute passed when my hips started bucking against him, uncontrollably in a rhythm of their own. My cunt gripped him tightly drawing a haggard groan from him. I felt my cum drip down between us and all but screamed when his thumb pressed against my clit.

“I need you to cum with me, baby. I need to feel you as I cum inside you.” His voice was a growl and his thumb matched the depth of his thrusts. The need overtook him as he pumped hard and unyielding as he reached the point of no return.

“Cum with me Callie, cum with me.” he begged through gritted teeth, my hips bucked and my body convulsed and his cum splashed my walls, he held himself deep inside me as my ever clenching walls milked every last drop from him. One final thrust and we were done, spent, exhausted and in a haze of post orgasmic bliss. I slumped against him as his body gave out and he fell back onto the floor. His arm wrapped around me as he slipped out followed by a gush of our cum.

 

 

Thoughts slowly began to return to my head as my breathing slowed and my body recovered. Damon lazily stroked my hair and kissed my temple.

“Has it always been that good between us?” he asked croakily, his voice still unwilling to return fully.

“Yeah.” I couldn’t trust myself to answer with more than one word 

“I remember fucking you but I could never remember the intensity of it. I wish I could remember everything or even just enough to be able to promise you our lives back. But even though I know my feelings for you are far bigger than anything I’ve ever felt before, I love Lottie too and I owe it to her to try and figure things out.” Did he really have to do this now? I guess at least I got to cum before he ripped my heart out. I moved away and stood pulling my clothes on quickly. He stood and tried to get me to stop. His hands gripped my arms and he forced me to look at him.

“I think you should leave now.” I prayed my eyes showed the conviction my tone lacked.

“I’m sorry. I’m just so confused. I want you, I need you but I don’t want you to get too excited. We have two different lives with other people. I came here today to explain I needed time to figure out my thoughts but then I saw you and something took over. I couldn’t stop myself. I had to have you, to feel you, to remember what it was like to love you.” his eyes pleaded with me as he dressed himself.

“Don’t come back. This isn’t fair. I’ll always love you but you just keep breaking my heart over and over again. I know you don’t mean to and you’re just trying to make sense of everything but I can’t keep doing this with you. I won’t make it out in one piece. Shut the door on your way out.” I kissed his lips softly, he tried to pull me close but I stepped away and turned before I completely embarrassed myself, again.

 

 

I heard the door open as I numbly climbed the stairs. My tears falling silently as my heart swore at me for being so stupid. He was just a man after all, could I really blame him for using me to satisfy his needs when I so willingly gave myself to him? Maybe he really did just want to talk and primal instincts just took over but maybe he planned it all along, he knew I wouldn’t say no and he had an itch to scratch. I glanced behind and saw him with one hand on the door, clearly having some sort of argument with himself. He looked up and caught my eyes, damn I should have turned away.

“I’m positive I loved you. I just can’t grasp the feeling yet. I’m sorry.” He smiled weakly and shut the door behind him.  My heart broke as the door closed but he'd be back. I could feel it in my soul. We were about as far from over as anyone could be.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER FOUR.

 

Quote

 

Damn it, this whole thing was a mess. Why couldn’t I control myself around Callie? Christ I’d only gone there to talk, to tell her I needed to stay away till I could understand or remember more, whichever came first. But no, I didn’t even say that to her, well not in the nice way I had envisioned before seeing her. I’d been an absolute cunt; I took what I wanted then broke her heart. I wasn’t expecting it to hurt this much, I left her before and felt a little remorse but nothing like this, It was almost as if I could feel her pain. I should have just left but no, I had to turn back. I caught her eyes and saw the damage I’d done. The pain in her soul; that was because of me. That had been a week ago and I still couldn’t shift the horrible feeling weighing down my heart. I took a long gulp of beer and closed my eyes trying to ignore all the thoughts in my head. My fifth beer hadn’t worked but hell might as well try a sixth. It wasn’t really working either; I just needed to piss a lot.

 

 

Lottie glared at me whilst I moved on to my seventh. I tried to ignore her eyes penetrating my skin but it proved a little difficult when she stood directly in front of me. I raised my eyes slowly, taking in her curves, her milky skin and her really angry eyes, fuck. What had I done now? Well, what had I done that she’d know about?

“What?” I probably should have used a nicer tone but the beer had worsened my mood.

“What the hell is wrong with you? All of a sudden you’ve become a complete dick head.”

“Why? Because I’m drinking beer?” I snarled and took another swig.

“It’s nine in the morning. You’re on your what, seventh? We were meant to be spending the day together, unless you wish you were with someone else?” Christ, I don’t think I’m in the right frame of mind to be answering this question. I stood and moved around her, slightly less steady then I would have liked.

“Have you been to see your counsellor?” she asked as I poured the remaining beer down the sink. Yes, I’d been to my counsellor, fat lot of good she was. ‘We just don’t know if you will ever remember. This snippet could be all you get. Do you really want to throw away your relationship with Lottie over a fleeting feeling?’ what the hell was I paying her for? Because it sure as hell wasn’t helping. I closed my eyes and rubbed them, hoping to coax some sobriety back.

“Yeah.”

“And what did she say?”

“Does it matter what she said? She has no idea what it’s like to lose a whole chunk of your life. To wake up one day with this woman saying she’s your wife and you loved her deeply but not have a clue who she is. To have all your friends interfering and acting like you’re pretending, like you must surely remember something. And then when you do remember something it just fucks everything up that you’ve tried so hard to believe is right.”

“Tried so hard to believe is right? Damon, what the fuck? Are you saying that you don’t think we’re working?” why was she asking me all these questions? Couldn’t she just shut up and pretend everything was fine in the hope we’d get through this?

 

 

Anger surged through my body as I tried hard to fight it back down. Lottie was asking a valid question, I just didn’t think I could answer it without breaking another heart.

“I think I need some space. I need some time to try and figure out who I am and what I want. I’m sorry Lottie; I just don’t think I can do this right now.” I headed to the bedroom and packed a bag, trying to keep my mind from forcing my mouth to say things I’d regret. Lottie had followed me in, screaming, crying, pleading with me to stay but I tuned her out. I mean given what everyone has told me about her, did she ever really love me? hell she apparently cheated on me through our whole relationship, I haven’t a clue as to why but I guess maybe I’m glad I don’t remember or perhaps I just don’t want to see the mess that is our relationship. I picked up the bag then walked over to her and kissed her softly on her head.

“Just give me some time, ok?” It was more of a statement then a question. I didn’t wait for an answer.

 

 

Sitting on the curb like a drunken homeless man was probably not my best look. Although given the appreciative looks from the women passing I guess it wasn’t my worst. I was mostly sober now, well I’d stopped swaying and the world had almost stopped spinning. I saw Toby’s car and waited till it stopped before attempting to get to my feet. The door opened and Toby stepped out,

“Hey man. You ok?” He steadied me as I stood and picked up my bag. I ran my fingers through my hair and cursed the beer for making me feel like shit. I guess now I know the reason why you shouldn’t drink before midday.

“I` just need somewhere to crash for awhile. Thanks for coming to get me. I can’t drive right now.”

“Start early, did we?” he grinned and opened the car door. I hefted myself in and rested my head against the window. Toby started the engine,

“You’re always welcome at ours so don’t even worry about it. Probably best to sleep it off though mate. We have a barbeque at ours this afternoon.” Christ, I’d forgotten about that. Everyone was invited; it was Toby’s wife’s birthday celebrations this weekend. Always started with a barbeque then got messier as the kids went to bed.

“Lottie has already told us she won’t be coming, so you don’t have to worry.” Toby pulled out and drove towards their beachfront house.

 

 

The neighbourhood had a strange sensation of home, of belonging and happiness but I couldn’t remember why. Maybe we’d spent a lot of time with Toby, Julia and the kids. Toby was Callie’s brother so it would make sense that we would be here a lot. I looked out at the houses; prefect beach houses, not imposing or garish. Just humble to the sea view. I would love to live here, something about the sea was calming or maybe it was the after effects of the beer. We pulled into the drive and Julia opened the door. She smiled as I walked over and held me close as I hugged her. I didn’t really remember Julia, well I remembered her vaguely but despite my lack of friendship she was always so comforting, almost like a mother except she was a year younger than me.

“Hello sweetheart, are you ok?” her voice soothed my aching soul and my tears begged to flow. I straightened up and forced my emotions away.

“I will be.” I forced a million watt smile and hoped she believed it, her face showed she could see through my facade but she didn’t push things. She took my arm and guided me in.

“We’ve set up the guest bedroom for you. Once the party’s over you can have the guest house. Go to sleep for a little while and you’ll feel better.” Their house was a typical family home with accents of surfing. Toby was a professional boarder until he decided he’d rather be at home with his wife then gallivanting across the world.

 

Something about the house made me nostalgic, I hadn’t noticed it before and I’d been here several times over the last few months. Toby had been my best mate since college; we’d shared a dorm and became inseparable. He spoke of Callie often but she was always off on adventures so I never met her. Well obviously I met her at some point but not in the years I remember. I do remember Toby refusing to show me a picture of her, he joked I’d fall for her and break her heart. I had a bit of a reputation till I met Lottie. I don’t even know what made me settle down; maybe I felt I had something to prove. I could be a good guy; I could fall in love and stay faithful. I guess I wasn’t the one with the problem on that front. My eyes grew heavy as I let the feeling of home envelope me for the first time since the accident.


© Copyright 2017 Laura2001. All rights reserved.

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