How Do You Stay - In this Madness?

~~Philosophy ~ Journal of Truths (My truths).

**I know why - though for just this small moment in time - I am questioning how?**

I keep coming back to this earthly plane over and over by choice. I live among you humans by choice. I choose different hardships each time I reincarnate to teach others to grow more accepting. The separateness that our human body's let's us feel - is unreal, because we are spirit. I am spirit. We ALL are. - spirit

** I don't get mad or crazy when someone does something I don't like - because if I don't like whatever "it is" - it's because - I used to do it, too! We call attention to the things we don't like in others - because they are reflections of us. At somewhere along the line, during another life-time I did the same things to someone else or it was done to me.  We are reflections of ourselves. **

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*Love others - as you love yourself - The Golden Rule.. !** God made man in his image.. Remember??

I come to this earthly plane to help people learn to get along.  To fit in - to play well together - To learn to love and be loved.

I think my problem is, I am too tired. I'm too much spirit - because I forget I'm playing a human. I forget the rules. As a spirit I can fly and soar.  Ever so often I try to fly as a human, but Gravity sucks!

I forget societies norms and expectations for "Human behavior."  Just like little kids, I have trouble staying in the moment - being focused. I forget where I live, I forget I've made plans, I fall in love all the time...& not with the same person.. I'm bad. I'm like a kid in the candy shop...only now as you age the candy you want changes. Now I look like a beautiful older woman, my candy of choice is other older humans...Here too, there are restricts spirits don't deal with. Energy is shared freely with all..  I forget about the biological boundaries and human created - restrictions. Hmmmm decisions, decisions...

Then I remember... I'm here.. Here to help the ones who don't remember they, too are spirits. Human's were born out of spirit and will return to spirit.

My human body had a stroke and I died. Well, almost. I was on my way home to the heavens when my daughter brought me back. After returning, I have had to learn to do things differently, I couldn't sift energy. I was too sensitive. Everyone else's energy was so intense.. I stayed linked to the heavens & slowly learned to tie into Earths core. When I could walk, touch, and feel. Then I started to rebuild my human.

I am bad - I play at being human. I am not grounded in the here & now. I'm not. look at this essay. I'm still spirit.
I'm only half trying to stay - too. I want to go home and be loved by our Father, the universe. I'm tired of the madness...

But I stay - for my little one. The one who bade me stay - she is wasn't ready to lose her Mom..I stay for the little one, my child - who shook me back into awareness. Ohhh! I was so mad at her. I was.  I was half way gone.. I didn't feel any pain - any more pain, I felt only the love. Heaven's Love....The Love of the universe.

Now I'm back - fighting to stay here.. Stay for my little one. She's supposed to wake up on her own. To recognize she's spirit, too.. but on her timeline..

But she's not. **("I don't care what Jesus or Father says, in my opinion - "Free Will "Sucks!") **My baby still thinks she's human, even though she hears spirits talk all the time. I used to hear them, too, when I was her human age. Waking up takes time. In time you realize, you are different... Not everyone hears spirit. As her mother, I didn't want her to. That gift was a curse in our society. And when the younger souls called her a freak, for hearing spirit when she was only 6 years old, I stepped in, and let her know it was okay that she heard spirits. Older Immature non spiritual souls are rude.

Right now - my baby is "grown" at 22 yrs old - She's into drugs. Trying to numb away her bad interactions with life, other immature souls & the living. Numb away the memories of her misguided life choices.  She should have zigged instead of zagged.  Her drug of choice was meth - then she found heroin. No needles - only pipes. but the haze of the drug is crippling, to her perceived earth body & her mind.

She is teaching me - how to not sift energy, which I had always done in the past.

I had sifted energy for a long, long time. Like wearing an invisible cloak, I would try on the energy of others, to experience life. Spirit's can't taste, feel, or smell life on our own. I mistakenly thought wearing another person's energy would helped me stay more grounded, but it doesn't. Well grounded in the Madness, maybe.