Lady Tuna And The Fortress Of Feces

Lady Tuna And The Fortress Of Feces

Status: Finished

Genre: Humor

Details

Status: Finished

Genre: Humor

Summary

Just when the galaxy of Funkoo thought it was safe to sit back on the toilet,Lady Tuna becomes infected with the same nano- meaties that reanimated the Turdbots.

Summary

Just when the galaxy of Funkoo thought it was safe to sit back
on the toilet,Lady Tuna becomes infected with the same nano-
meaties that reanimated the Turdbots.

Content

Submitted: September 27, 2012

A A A | A A A

Content

Submitted: September 27, 2012

A A A

A A A





LADY TUNA AND THE FORTRESS OF FECES

WRITTEN BY

JOSEPH A. SMALL

2011


LADY TUNA had awakened from her bed when Chaknee came in with the mail,and
a copy of the Tunakian Times newspaper...

"Good morning,you washed up has-been." Chaknee greeted Lady Tuna...

"And a 'Fuck You' to you too,Chaknee." Lady Tuna fired back...

"Ah,after all you've been through and you still got it."

"You damn right I still got it!"

"Well,I just hope these letters from those intergalactic porn companies you
submitted to agree."

Chaknee opened up the letters,and looked them over...

"Don't leave me in suspense! What do they say?" Lady Tuna pleaded...

"I'm afraid it's not good news."

"What the fuck do you mean?"

"Well this one production company says your tits sag too much,they're not firm or perky enough by their
standards. This other company says that the pictures of you shoving that butternut squash up your snatch gave them the
impression that your vagina is worn out like a old sock."

"Damn it! What about the last one?"

"It gets worse."

"Worse?"

"Yes. It seems that many of their porn stars can't abide your body odor. Your female hygiene problem causes
them to gag & barf."

"I warned you not to send those scratch & sniff photos of my crotch! So much for adding 'porn star' to my
resum'e!"

A look came over Chaknee as if he was holding something back. Lady Tuna took notice of it...

"Please tell me you ruined my breakfast?"

"I wish it was that simple,but it's not. I picked up the newspaper today. It says the Tunakian Council have
appointed a new queen."

"What?! They can't do that shit! By law only I can do that,regardless if I'm queen,or not. Unless I was
dead!"
"Oh yes,I know."

"Who is this Bitch that dares to replace me?"

"It's your old rival...CONNEEKA TUNICA."

"You mean Connie?!"

"Yes,that horrible Connie."

"Why that backstabbin' Hussy! Chaknee get my outfit,and have a transport ready! I'm going to the Tunapolis
to put a stop to this fuckin' shit once,and for all!"

"Right away!" Chaknee scrambled...

"Connie as queen? Fuck that Bitch!" Lady Tuna went on.


TUNAPOLIS:
A FEW HOURS LATER:

Lady Tuna arrived at the Tunapolis which was a rectangler building with large pilars around it,and a huge
court in the center. When Lady Tuna stepped out of her transport,Tunakia's media surrounded her with questions...

"Lady Tuna,how do you feel about Conneeka Tunica taking the throne as queen?" One reporter asked...

"I'm pissed off! How the fuck am I supposed to feel,Idiot?"

"According to rumors,is it true that you are planning a career in porn?" Another reporter asked.

Lady Tuna stopped at the front entrance of the Tunapolis, she turned around to face the crowd of reporters,
photographers,and video crews...

"What does this tell ya?"

Lady Tuna lifted up her skirt,and exposed herself to the crowd. The media went wild as a frenzy of camera
flashes gave off a strobelight effect on her vagina. She turned back around,and headed inside the Tunapolis.


INSIDE THE GREAT HALL OF THE TUNAPOLIS:

As Lady Tuna entered the great hall,two guards tried to block her way...

"Stop where you are! You are not permitted to enter!"

One of the guards warned her. She grabbed both guards by the balls,and squeezed real hard,forcing them to
fall to the floor. She then released them,and continued to walk inside along with Chaknee...

"You handled THEM quite well."

"Thank you,Chaknee."

Lady Tuna opened one of the large doors of the center court to find the Tunakian Council fawning over the
new queen. Who was a thin woman with blue eyes,and long straight blonde hair. On her head was Lady Tuna's royal crown...

"How dare you put that fake Bitch in my place!"

Lady Tuna scorned the council.She then confronted Connie...

"Take that crown off your fuckin' head,Bitch! You have no right to take over the monarchy!"

Lady Tuna warned Connie. One of the members of the council spoke up...

"We have been without a leader for far too long,and we certainly do not want you!"

"If you want her as your prime minister that's just fine,funky,and dandy,but not as your queen!"

"Then who? You exiled your two sisters,and by your rules they could never return,and take over the throne."

"That's true. I admit there are problems with the laws I made so many years ago which is how the people
managed to oust me out in the first place,but it is my choosing to pick the next queen,and I pick...CHAKNEE!"

"Who me?! Oooooh!!!" Chaknee passed out on the floor...

"What? You can't do that! According to your laws no man can take the throne as king!"

"That's also true,but there's no law saying that a man can't take the throne as queen,and believe me,
Chaknee is the biggest queen I know."

"Very well,Lady Tuna. Chaknee will be our new queen."

"No! AAAAH!!!" Connie screamed in disappointment...

"OH YEAHS,CONNIE! OH,YEAHS!"

Lady Tuna got in Connie's face,relishing her defeat by hootchy cootchy dancing in front of her. Chaknee
layed on the floor,looking up at the ceiling...

"Chaknee get off that floor,so I can inaugurate you."

Lady Tuna said as she pulled Chaknee up on his feet...

"Get your sorry ass off that throne Connie,and give me back that crown!" Lady Tuna demanded...

"No! No, I won't!"

Connie screamed. Lady Tuna walked up to the throne,and slapped her. She then snatched the crown off her
head. Connie fell to the floor having a tantrum. Lady Tuna walked back over to Chaknee...

"Kneel before me,Chaknee."

With tears of glee in his eyes,he complied. Lady Tuna placed the crown on his head...

"Chaknee, I proclaim you Queen Of Tunakia."

"Oh thank you,Lady Tuna. This is the kindest thing you ever did for me."

Lady Tuna stepped back to admire the new queen. She was about to say something to him when she felt a
massive gurgling in her tummy. It was followed by a huge fart that made the back of her skirt flap up...

"Oh,me so sorry,Queen Chaknee!"

"That's alright. I know you all too well. You have my blessing to break wind any time you like."

"Oh goody,cuz me feel another one coming on! Ooh!"

Lady Tuna was letting out farts left & right,until she butt blasted a big pile of shit on the floor. The
Tunakian Council moved away from her to the other side of the room holding their noses from the smell...

"Lady Tuna what's going on? Why did you shit on the floor?" Queen Chaknee asked...

"I...I don't know?! I feel real sick to me tummy! Uh....." Lady Tuna said just before passing out on the
floor...
"AAAAH! Look at the dooky?!"

One of the council women screamed out,startling Queen Chaknee. He turned around to look at it,and saw the
pile of shit moving around...

"What the...?"

The pile of shit began to coil & grow larger,becoming a huge heap as it was spreading out like foam.
Everyone started to panic...

"We must evacuate the Tunapolis!" Declared Queen Chaknee.

People screamed as they ran out of the Tunapolis as it was taken over by the re-animated dooky. Connie kept
screaming to the point of sheer madness,unable to comprehend the floating turd balls that swirled around her head like a
bizarre halo. As everyone got out of the building,Queen Chaknee looked around for Lady Tuna...

"Where's Lady Tuna?" He asked,just before realizing she was still inside the Tunapolis...

"Guards! Go back in there,and save Lady Tuna!"

The guards were hesitant at first,but then went inside. A few minutes later they pulled out Lady Tuna who
was covered in doo doo. The shit was filling up the Tunapolis,breaking through the roof as it was rising upward to the sky.
The Tunapolis had become a towering fortress of feces...

"Contact one of our starship battle cruisers,and have them laserblast that dooky away from space!"

Queen Chaknee commanded...

"Right away,your majesty."

One of the battleships targeted the Tunapolis from space,and shot a laser down on the planet's surface.
Queen Chaknee watched the shit being burned away,but it regenerated,covering over the charred area...

"Damn! Call in security,and have them place a containment force field around the Tunapolis. I don't want
that shit to spread to the rest of the planet. I'll go with Lady Tuna to the hospital to get to the bottom of this shit."

Queen Chaknee told everyone. Taking charge of the situation.

TUNABELLA HOSPITAL:

DR. TUNATOO summoned Queen Chaknee into the examination room where Lady Tuna was being scanned...

"Queen Chaknee, I want you to come in here,and see this?"

Queen Chaknee entered the room,and found a naked Lady Tuna laying on the table...

"Oh doctor,that's nothing new. I've been seeing her like that for years."

"Oh no,my queen. I want you to look at the medical scan on the wall monitor?"

Queen Chaknee looked over the image on the monitor,and could see tiny pulsating dots glowing in Lady Tuna's
intestinal tract. He was in shock...

"What are those little dots?"

"Those are fecalized nano meaties inside Lady Tuna's colon."

"You mean the same ones that gave life to the Turdbots?"

"I'm afraid so."

"Oh,shit! This could mean another invasion of those awful things?"

"It's probable."

"Guards? Contact Tuna Command,and have them contact the Cosma Muffaletta. Inform Captain Picante that we
have another crisis on our hands,and I need to speak to Professor Makimee Makimoomoo right away."

"Yes,my queen."

ON THE OTHER SIDE OF FUNKOO:

Docked at the space port known as the PORTREXA,the Cosma Muffaletta receives Queen Chaknee's signal...

"Captain Picant'e,we are receiving a distress signal from Tunakia."

Carlotta CaCa Ah informed him...

"Open a channel,Carlotta."

Queen Chaknee appears on the view screen...

"This is Queen Chaknee..."

"Wait a minute? Don't you mean King Chaknee?" Captain Picante interrupted...

"No. I was appointed Queen Of Tunakia."

"Oh,okay."

Everyone looked at each other in confusion. Captain Picante decided to overlook what Chaknee addressed
himself as,and get to the problem...

"Queen Chaknee how can we help you?" Captain Picante asked...

"We have a bit of a crisis here. We believe that Lady Tuna is still infected with the nano meaties that
generated the Turdbots. We need Professor Makimoomoo's anti meatie micro boo boos to nip this problem in the bud before it
spreads."
"How bad is the situation now?"

"We have Lady Tuna here at the hospital,but earlier this afternoon she took a wicked crap at the Tunapolis
and it came alive & grew all over the place. It transformed the structure into a temple of doo doo. We have a force field to
contain it around the perimeter,but we don't know how long it will hold."

"Queen Chaknee we are on our way to help you. Inform Tuna Command to expect us."

"I will. Thank you,Captain Picante."

As Queen Chaknee ended communications,one of the nurses screamed in Lady Tuna's room...

"AAAAH! Her hair!"

Queen Chaknee & Dr.Tunatoo rushed into the room to find Lady Tuna's hair had fallen out of her head. Her
signature hair puffs fell to the floor like a couple of old pom poms...

"Oh,dear! She's completely bald!" Queen Chaknee shouted in horror...

"Look at the scan? The nano meaties have spread to the rest of her body!" Dr.Tunatoo pointed out...

"Oh,no!"

As Queen Chaknee looked at the scan in disbelief,he could smell a strong odor of shit in the air...

"Excuse me doctor,but did you just fart?"

"No. I think Lady Tuna did."

Everyone stepped back when Lady Tuna's legs rised straight up in the air...

"What is she doing?"

A puzzled Queen Chaknee asked. Without warning a massive amount of shit gushed out of her butthole.
Everyone ran out of the room from the pungent smell,and out of fear...

"Oh,no! Not again!"

Queen Chaknee shrieked in disgust. Lady Tuna sat up sharply like an android as the giant turd crawled up
her back,and attached itself to the top of her bald head. The turd adorned her like a huge beehive hairdo...

"Ugh! I've been through so much shit with this woman that I don't know how much more I can take!"

Queen Chaknee confided to the doctor...

"I've never seen anyone defecate as much as she did. I should of placed her in suspended animation when I
had the chance. If those micro boo boos don't get here in time we may be all doomed."

Dr.Tunatoo told him. Lady Tuna got up from the table,and stood upright. She walked out of the room like a
robot...
"Security! Stop her!"

Ordered Dr.Tunatoo. Lady Tuna layed a long continuous fart while a thick brown smoke from her poop chute
filled the air. Creating a smoke screen that made everyone cough & gag. People on the street gawked & stared as Lady Tuna
left the hospital naked with a large turd on her head. The brown smoke followed behind her,filling the streets like a fog...

"I'm guessing that giant turd is full of nano meaties too?"

"Not only that,but the scan also detected the presence of undigested corn & peanuts embedded within the
turd as well."

After hearing what the doctor said,Queen Chaknee placed his hand on his forhead in a melodramatic pose and
fainted. When Lady Tuna reached the shit encrusted entrance of the Tunapolis. Her sinister brown smog got sucked into the
force field's power generators,causing them to short out,and shut down. She proceeded to walk inside as the re-animated dooky
opened up to allow her in,and close up when she entered. Lady Tuna was concealed inside the turd fortress.

THE NEXT DAY:

The Cosma Muffaletta had arrived at Tunakia. Queen Chaknee & Dr.Tunatoo came aboard to discuss the dooky
situation with Captain Picante,Dr.Tasty Crumbcakes,and Professor Makimee Makimoomoo...

"I'm very sorry to drag you into this,but we are desperate." Queen Chaknee told Captain Picante...

"It's quite alright,your majesty. You did the right thing." Captain Picante told him...

"I blame myself for what has happened. When Lady Tuna took a bowel movement the last time she was here,I
was so eager to find a way to stop the Turdbots that I overlooked the possibility that she still had nano meaties inside her
asshole. I should of had Dr.Crumbcakes give her a thorough regimen of anti meatie enemas to exterminate them,as well as a
series of anti meatie douches in case some may have crawled up into her vagina."

Professor Makimoomoo added...

"Yes,that would be nice,but my nurses administer those types of procedures,not me."

Dr.Crumbcakes told them. Everyone jumped up when the red alert boo boos were activated. Captain Picante
rushed to the intercom...

"Commander Fondue,what's going on?"

"Sir,the turd fortress has detached itself from the planet's surface,and is rising up to our orbit."

Everybody ran to the bridge. Queen Chaknee stayed in the background as Captain Picante to his position...

"Status?" Captain Picante asked...

"The turd fortress has broken through Tunakia's atmosphere,and will reach our location in a few seconds,Sir."

"Activate view screen."

The crew looked at the giant floating turd in astonishment...

"Look at the size of that turd ball! This is not good!" Captain Picante said...

"Should I contact Tuna Command,and have them intercept it?" Queen Chaknee suggested...

"No. We don't want to appear as a threat. Have them on stand by." The captain told him...

"Captain,we are being hailed." Carlotta CaCa Ah interrupted...

"Open a channel."

Lady Tuna appears on the view screen. She still has the big turd on her head,and her naked breasts are
showing...

"Coo Coo,Cumbus,Clausins of the Cosma Muffaletta,you will surrender your Boo Boo to me,to further my goal
as the supreme turd queen of the galaxy. Failure to do so will result in your demise. End communication."

Lady Tuna threatened,crossing her arms,and turning off her signal...

"Professor Makimoomoo,how do we get the anti meaties over there?" Captain Picante wondered...

"It's going to be difficult,perhaps even impossible. Because Lady Tuna is the hostess of the nano meaties,
the anti meaties must be administered inside her ass. I have designed a phallic applicator that needs to be inserted in her
rectum,inducing her to let out a special fart that would release airborn anti meatie micro boo boos inside the turd fortress,
and breakdown the fecal matter."

"Queen Chaknee,you've been her trusted servant for many years. Do you think she'll let you get close enough
to do this task?"
"No,I doubt it. She would be very suspicious if I went anywhere near her hiney,however there is one man in
this universe that has a chance. A man she would not reject no matter how bitter she is towards him,and that man is...Mr.Beaner."


PLUTON:
MR.BEANER'S PLACE:

Mr.Beaner & 2T2 are hanging out in front of the toilet bowl section of the Pelican. Mr.Beaner was feeling
down in the dumps since his long lost ex-girlfriend FiFi Bee Bee had returned,only to break up with him to persue a career in
cooking shows on intergalactic television...

"Eh,I can't believe FiFi broke my heart,after all these years of longing for her Coo Coos. I could've been
out there getting some sweet lovin' Foo Foos from someone else."

"Yeah,it's pretty fucked up what she did to you. I could see if there was another man,or she came out as a
lesbian,but a cheesy ass cooking show? That's fuckin' low."

"Eh,thanks alot 2T2! Now I feel worse than I did before!" Mr.Beaner frowned...

"Oh,cheer up old man! The woman of your dreams just might turn up when you least expect it."

In the distance,Queen Chaknee & two storm poopers approach Mr.Beaner & 2T2...

"Ah,here she is now! No,wait a minute. I think that's a dude." 2T2 joked...

"Mr.Beaner,I'm Queen Chaknee of Tunakia." The queen introduced himself as he came closer...

"Sorry Honey,but he doesn't swing that way...At least not yet." 2T2 interrupted...

"I beg your pardon?!" Queen Chaknee snapped at 2T2...

"Uh,oh! Uptight Bitch Alert!" 2T2 snapped back...

"Mr.Beaner I'm here on serious business on behalf of Tunakia,and the last thing I need right now is your
floating trash can making rude remarks!"

"Trash can? You're lucky you look like a hot chick,or I would zap you!" 2T2 warned...

"Eh,2T2 please! I want to hear what he,or she has to say. Go ahead. Oh,by the way that's a lovely cloak
you're wearing."
"Um,thank you. Well,anyway do you remember when you used Betty Boo Boo's device to detect those nano meaties
on Lady Tuna when we were on Isakoola?"

"Eh,yes." Mr.Beaner responded...

"Well,she's infected again,and now we have another poop problem on Tunakia that could spread throughout
Funkoo if we don't stop it in time."

"Eh,how do I know if this isn't some kind of sick & twisted trick that Lady Tuna made up,so she could get
her hands on my meaties?"

Mr.Beaner questioned...

"Mr.Beaner this isn't a trick. We really need your help. Are you willing not to take that chance,and have
Funkoo infested with those filthy Turdbots again?"

"Oh,alright! But I must warn you. 2T2 has a built in detonator. One false move from any of you Tunakians..."

"Okay,fine. I pinch your old ass,and we all go 'BOOM!'. I get it,now let's go. There's not much time."

Mr.Beaner & 2T2 got into the Pelican,and followed Queen Chaknee's ship back to Tunakia.

IN THE SHADOWS OF TURDS:

As the Cosma Muffaletta led the stand off against the turd fortress until Queen Chaknee's return. Lady Tuna
hailed them again when Captain Picante failed to give in to her demands to give up his Boo Boo...

"I see that you've made up your mind,Captain Picante. Now prepare to feel the wrath of my turds,you stupid
fat ass chicken! Tee,hee,hee!"

Lady Tuna threatened over the view screen...

"Captain! Lady Tuna just jettisoned a massive ball of shit from the turd fortress! It is hurling towards us
at a alarming rate!"

"RED ALERT! EVERYONE TO BATTLE STATIONS!"

The crew scurried about all over the bridge as the giant turd ball spun towards them...

"Target that turd,and fire!" Captain Picante commanded.

A stream of Boo Boo torpedoes shot into the giant turd. After the strike,a series of explosions within
caused the turd to split apart. A huge fragment of feces smashed into the Cosma Muffaletta. The impact caused the Boo Boo to
tilt sharply,tossing the crew to one side of the ship. Captain Picante was clucking wildly as the rest of the crew screamed
in a panic...

"(Ba-bock) Retract! Pull back the ship,or we'll be destroyed!"

Captain Picante ordered the crew. The Cosma Muffaletta moved away from the fecal debri...

"Set a course for deep space. I want to see if Lady Tuna will leave Tunakia,and follow us."

"Yes,captain."

"And contact Queen Chaknee,and inform him about what has happened."

BACK ON THE PELICAN:

Mr.Beaner & 2T2 follow Queen Chaknee's ship with caution...

"Eh,I wonder what they have in store for us?" Mr.Beaner wondered...

"More likely they'll drop it on our laps when we get there."

"Eh,but you don't have a lap."

"Figure of speech,Genius."

A green light blinks off & on...

"Your sweetheart is hailing us."

"Stop it,2T2! I'm already upset as it is!"

Queen Chaknee appears on the small monitor over the communicator...

"Mr.Beaner,I've received word from the Cosma Muffaletta that they were attacked by Lady Tuna. We must now
meet up with them at a different location. I'm sending you the new coordinates."

"Eh,thank you,your highness."

"Wasn't that nice of him? I think he really likes you." 2T2 teased...

"Eh,you don't know when to stop,do you?"

"Gosh,no. Should I?" 2T2 said sarcastically...

"Eh,you know Queen Chaknee gave me an idea. Maybe I should take out your parts,and use you as a waste paper
basket."
"Okay,I'll behave! Lighten up,you old bastard!"

A FEW HOURS LATER:

Queen Chaknee & Mr.Beaner finally met up with the Cosma Muffaletta which managed to outsmart Lady Tuna by
eluding her in the newly restored Dookyroid Field. After landing,Captain Picante invited them into his conference room to
discuss their dire dilemma...

"Mr.Beaner,we brought you here because we need your help in stopping Lady Tuna." Captain Picante pleaded...

"Eh,but why me?" Mr.Beaner asked...

"We have reason to believe that her deep feelings for you may allow you to get close enough to give her a
dose of anti meaties that will kill the excrement that has a stronghold on her meaties."

"Eh,but what if it backfires? Will her dooky take control of my meaties too?" Mr.Beaner feared...

"Your mission won't be easy,Mr.Beaner. We don't have any other options,and our time is running out."

The captain pleaded with him. Mr.Beaner took a deep breath,and gave in...

"Eh,what is it that you want me to do when I get over there?"

"We've constructed this penis shaped nebulizer filled with anti meatie micro boo boos. Once you are close
to her fanny you must ram it up her butt,and press the red button. The device will do the rest."

Professor Makimoomoo told him,as Dr.Crumbcakes gave him an injection...

"I'm giving you a dose of anti meaties in case Lady Tuna infects you."

Dr.Crumbcakes assured Mr.Beaner...

"Eh,oh goody!"

The red alert went off again. Captain Picante contacted the bridge...

"Status report?"

"Lady Tuna has detected us,and has locked on to our position,Sir."

Commander Fondue informed him...

"Stand by on weapons,Commander Fondue. Mr.Beaner prepare yourself.The time has come."

"Eh,ooh!"

INSIDE THE TURD FORTRESS:

Lady Tuna sat on her throne of dooky quietly. Using the doo doo that surrounded her to feel her way through
Coo Coo space to the Cosma Muffaletta. Her eyes widened with surprise when she sensed a familiar presence aboard the galaxy
class Boo Boo...

"Mr.Beaner?" Lady Tuna whispered.

ON THE COSMA MUFFALETTA:

Everyone followed Captain Picante to the bridge...

"What is our situation now,Commander Fondue?"

"The turd fortress is in range,Sir."

"Put it on screen."

Everyone watched the turd fortress moving in on them. Lady Tuna launched another rotating ball of shit in
their direction...

"Fire weapons!"

Captain Picante shouted. The Cosma Muffaletta shot a few lasers at it,but missed. The chunky turdball
continued to spin towards them...

"Move the ship out of it's path!" Captain Picante commanded. The Cosma Muffaletta tried to maneuver out of
the way,but it was too late...

"Everyone brace yourselves for impact!"

The turdball hit the back of the Cosma Muffaletta,knocking it off it's trajectory...

"Damage report?"

"Boo Boo Section Yellow has sustained heavy damage,including the doughnut shop,the health spa,and the pre-
school."

Captain Picante turned to Mr.Beaner...

"See if you can reason with her,Mr.Beaner?"

"Eh,I don't know,but I'll try."

"Open a channel."

Lady Tuna appears on the view screen...

"Mr.Beaner? What are you doing on that ship?" Lady Tuna questioned...

"Eh,I was wondering if I could come over,and talk to you?"

"I'm no fool,Mr.Beaner! You're trying to trick me,and that big chicken man is behind it! Wait till I get my
fuckin' hands on him! I'll pluck his fuckin' feathers out,and roast him for my Din Din!"

"Eh,no! No! There's no trickypoo here! I just want you to stop attacking us with your evil dooky,and negotiate
a truce."
"There's nothing to negotiate! You will all be forced to accept shit,to embrace shit,to celebrate shit,and
be one with the shit! It's that simple! Tee,hee,hee!"

Lady Tuna warned them...

"Eh,wait a minute!"

"What is it now,Mr.Beaner?"

"Eh,well you see FiFi came back after all these years,only to break up with me."

"She did? That fuckin' Bitch! Do you want me to send my turds to attack her?"

"Eh,maybe later. The thing is I feel lonely & sad,and before you turn us into dooky I was wondering if you
would do the 'bouncy bouncy' to my Coo Coos like old times?"

"What?! But why,Mr.Beaner? Why?"

"Eh,because I'm a old fart,and not good looking anymore. It's very hard for me to get laid these days.
You're the only person I know that would Coo Coo the fuck out of me no matter what I look like."

"Very well,Mr.Beaner.But you must come alone. If you cross me in any way you will discover a new level of
humiliation as you are double dipped in diarrhea,and rolled in candy sprinkles!"

"Eh,oh my goodness!"

MISSION TO THE TURD FORTRESS:

Mr.Beaner entered the launch bay where a shuttle pod was prepared for him. He turned to his trusted sidekick
2T2...
"Eh,now 2T2 take care of the Pelican for me. In case I don't come back,she is yours."

"Ugh! Will you stop it with the sappy bullshit?"

"Eh,ooh! Just watch the damn ship,and stay out of my nacho cheese crackers! Is that better,2T2?!"

"Perfect!"

Mr.Beaner's pod launched from the Cosma Muffaletta,and headed towards the dark & evil turd fortress. He was
scared out of his Coo Coos...

"Eh,ooh! That's a big piece of doo doo! I don't like this at all!"

Mr.Beaner thought to himself as his pod moved closer. The turd fortress opened up like a flower in bloom,
sucking Mr.Beaner inside. Lady Tuna closed her eyes in ecstasy,feeling Mr.Beaner's Eroshina as he entered her realm of
defecation...
"Ooh,yeahs!"

She cried out in a aroused state. When Mr.Beaner opened his pod,nobody warned him about the stench he would
experience,and it hit him hard...

"Eh,phew! It stinks like dooky in here!"

Mr.Beaner shouted just before putting on his breathing tube...


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