Soft, warm. Listening to the steadiness of her lungs. One breath in, one breath out. Something I wasn’t used to, especially not with the record of nightmares in her long history. But she kept her arms around me throughout the night, never letting go. Not even for a second.
“Mnhm,” She moaned softly against the back of my head.
Why was I still the little spoon? Rarely big spoon, sure. Always had me in her arms at night. Naked, of course. Last night was her night, like every night. But last night was different, not like when she was always the big spoon. No, last night, Ash was my big spoon. I only had to ask once, and she delivered. My body was hers, and how does she repay me? She falls asleep without fulfilling her role! Still, the questions were driving me mad. Wasn’t it the responsibility of the big spoon? To commit to the little one? Why was she doing nothing? Sleepy, of course, I knew she was. But why wasn’t she committed to me as my big spoon, especially when I was starting to feel more like a fucking spork!
“Ash?” I whispered out quietly.
“Ash?” I repeated a bit louder. Part of me wanted her to wake up, while the other part wished she would stay asleep.
“Sleep,” She mumbled almost incoherently as the bed shifted. Soft, moistened lips touching against my shoulder; she’d been planting lazy kisses up and down, all between my neck and shoulder. All of it, every second of it- clearly a distraction. Did she not understand the importance of this dilemma?
“Sleep,” She repeated a bit more forcefully, doing her best to sound much more dominant than I. But I could hear the strain in her voice. That small, hidden message that was often left unsaid: It’s late. Stop bothering me.
“Ash,” I whimpered before finally withdrawing. I couldn’t do it as well as she could.
“Rabbit,” She answered back with a deep sigh.
No, I needed her to do this. She was better at it than I was, and I loved how she did it because it was always better when she did it.
Was I right to wake her up for this? No… no, I should let her go back to bed. Didn’t sleep like this often, I knew that. My Ash needed sleep. Didn’t need to sleep like she did, no. At-least, not quite as often. Keeping her up this late for something like this…
“Why am I the little spoon?”
“What?” Her voice was as soft as it was confused. Made sense. After all, I just woke her up to finish what she had started last night.
“Why am I the little spoon?”
“Kali,” I heard her sigh again, clearly annoyed by the fact that I woke her up for this. “We talked about this.”
Why was she acting like none of this mattered? There was a little spoon, and then there was a big spoon. How did none of this matter to her? Little spoon, big spoon. Me, her. Not her, me! Little, big! Not big, small!
“No, you talked and I listened!” I frowned.
It was all just a short lecture. You’re not enjoying this, she said. How did she know whether or not I was enjoying it? Stopped so suddenly. Tried to talk her back into it, that I was perfectly fine but no. She didn’t listen. Refused to keep touching. Why? Did she not want to play anymore? Was she bored of me? Maybe I wasn’t responding the way she wanted. Wished more of me. More noisy, perhaps?
“I don’t want to be the little spoon anymore!” I fought the urge to yell any louder than I had been. “You’re not doing anything and I’m sick of being the little spoon! Little spoon is bored!”
“You were losing interest,” She mumbled, each word becoming less and less sluggish after the next. In fact, I could hear her sniffing gently from behind me. “Besides, weren’t you the one that asked me to stop?”
“I didn’t mean for you to stop completely, you idiot!” I grew impatient with her, but part of me was pleased to see her finally paying attention to me.
Suddenly, her hand squeezed along my side before she proceeded to give me a gentle nudge. Followed her gestures and rolled over. Could fully see Ash as she was. Auburn hair, white skin. Warm smile, soft blue gaze. Butterfly kisses planted over and over again. One of us giggling; it was Ash, of course.
“Perhaps you can explain to me why you smell funny?” She mused with a sly smirk. “Sort of like a wet pussy?”
I scrunched my nose at her words. The literal word, pussy. Vulgar, childish. A terrible word, and even worse substitute. I especially hated when such an ugly word came from such a pretty mouth. All I wanted to do was cuddle this gorgeous, naked woman in front of the fireplace, and then she had to go and make fun of the way I smelled. It’s not like I went outside and rolled around in the rain like- wait. Was I blind to her comment? Did she compare me to that of a cat?
Me? A house pet? Pfft. I was better than a house pet. Big enough for Ash to use as a pillow. Loved cuddling, especially as an animal. Strange though. Everyone thought us queer, even friends on Lantau. Most humans didn’t like to cuddle their mate, especially when we took animal form. But not Ash. No, she treated me differently. Embraced the change. Called me beautiful. Petted me often. But what of her sex joke? No one found pussy cats intimidating, and I was definitely no pussy.
“Oh, little rabbit.” She gave me one of her sympathetic looks and bit her bottom lip. “You are so not getting any of this, are you?” Her words were much more playful.
“Ugh,” I rolled my eyes and dismissed the thought. “Just forget it. Geez, why are you so weird?”
“I’m the weird one?” She laughed. “Did you not just go on a rant about you being some silly kitchen utensil?”
“T-that’s not the point!” I tried to defend myself. Why was she not understanding that I needed her, or that felt like a spork to her spoon? Did she not feel my spork? Better yet, did she not just finish smelling the obvious musk in the air, or was she ignoring it? Was I touching myself wrong, or did she simply not want to finish the job?
“What’s the point then?” She scooted a bit further towards me beneath the sheets. Our faces getting closer and closer until her lips sat only centimeters from my own, teasing relentlessly. Always teasing, but never committing.
“I think you’re the one not getting it,” I frowned.
She wasn’t getting it.
“Get, what?” I continued to feign ignorance.
Obviously, Kali was a very special case but I wasn’t blind to her. I could easily smell the amount of times she tried to pleasure herself as I had slept. After all, the entire living room smelled like she’d been at it for several hours but she couldn’t achieve the one thing she wanted without assistance.
“You’re not getting it!” She finally snapped, like it was my fault somehow. “How much more obvious do I have to make it before you finally-?”
“Wait,” I silenced her by immediately taking a hold of her wrist from breath the covers. Suddenly, her demeanor changed and I watched carefully as the woman before me had began to tremble with anticipation.
Slowly, I began guiding her hand further down, careful to brush her own finger tips very lightly against her skin. Her eyes were just about as intense as they were out-of-focus as she poured all of her attention toward one single sense, and it only made me realize just how aroused she had been since I left her almost completely untouched last night.
“Did you want me to do something?” I asked curiously, taking my own finger to graze the entrance of her swollen lower lips and just as my finger swept past, the very tip had gathered an unsurprisingly thick layer of her own hot mess.
“Y-you-!” She shuddered from the sudden touch and shook her head furiously. “What else can I possibly do, you idiot?” The words came out icily as she grew more and more frustrated over my inability to figure all of this out sooner. “What do I need to do to get you to-?”
“Are you so turned on that you cannot see that I am clearly fucking with you?” I tried to keep myself from laughing. To be honest, I just wanted to see how long all of this would play out before she finally broke down and forced me to satisfy her needs.
“That’s the problem, isn’t it?” She growled. “You’re fucking with me, but you clearly aren’t fucking me.”
“You’re taking this too seriously,” I managed a smile shortly before planting a gentle kiss on her nose. As quickly as I had pecked her, I watched the anger flush away like it had never touched her. “Did you really think I couldn’t smell the honey trickling down your thighs at this very second, let alone feel you rubbing your body against mine for friction all night? Perhaps you thought I wouldn’t understand the hidden meaning behind your queer thoughts, or that I wouldn’t know what you meant by referring to yourself as a spork? I mean, seriously… spork to spoon?”
“If you knew what I meant, then why didn’t you do anything?” Her words grew tender. “I wanted you to make the first move and you didn’t.”
“I was asleep before you woke me up, Kali.” I reminded her gently. “How did you expect me to know when you barely make any noise at all when you’re in a rut?”
Asleep or not, she should’ve known. It wasn’t difficult to notice, even when she awoke. Spork to spoon, small to big. Ashen to auburn, original to daeva. Back to stomach, me to her. Did she not understand any of it? It was a simple process, and an even simpler solution!
“Can you just be my spoon before I change my mind?” The feeling grew more and more frustrating. “You’re lucky to even see me like-!”
“Shut up.” She silenced me with a teasing voice as I suddenly found myself lying on my back.
“Listen,” Her tone had drastically changed. Nothing like before. “You tell me to stop and I will, do you understand?”
Words. No, her words. Each soft, sincere. Hesitant? Insecurity, fear. Worried that I wasn’t ok, or that I might have been forcing this to appease her. She was beautiful like this. Thoughtful. Mindful, always caring about my comfort and well-being. Always needed my consent before she touched. Not like me, no. I just touched her whenever I wanted. No questions asked. But this was different, and it only made the butterflies start up again.
“Kali,” She spoke a bit louder, trying to make sure that I was listening to her.
… Had I not answered?
“I want this, Ash,” I spoke up with honesty, “and I want you.”
“I want you too,” Her words spoke softer, lighter, all while I felt her fingers starting to move again.
© Copyright 2017 JaayAnon. All rights reserved.
Short Story / Erotica
Book / Fantasy
Book / Gay and Lesbian