To grow up in Serbia

To grow up in Serbia To grow up in Serbia

Status: Finished

Genre: Other

Details

Status: Finished

Genre: Other

Summary

This is a story about a boy who grew up in a family divided by nationalism, in a country that led several wars during his upbringing. The stories from the boy's life are being compared to some of the horror stories from the time of war as well as postwar period. I will only publish a part of the book on BooksieSilk. For further reading please look for it on Barnes and Noble website or Amazon.

Summary

This is a story about a boy who grew up in a family divided by nationalism, in a country that led several wars during his upbringing. The stories from the boy's life are being compared to some of the horror stories from the time of war as well as postwar period.
I will only publish a part of the book on BooksieSilk. For further reading please look for it on Barnes and Noble website or Amazon.

Chapter1 (v.1) - To grow up in Serbia

Author Chapter Note

This is a story about a boy who grew up in a family divided by nationalism, in a country that led several wars during his upbringing. The stories from the boy's life are being compared to some of the horror stories from the time of war as well as postwar period.

Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: October 30, 2014

Reads: 315

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Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: October 30, 2014

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Introduction

 

When Milosevic came to power in 1987, it was the beginning of something nobody could have predicted. It wasn’t just the beginning of the end of Yugoslavia, country that was ruled in peace by its president Tito for forty years. It was the beginning of the end of a normal life on the Balkans. It was the end of brotherhood and unity among the Serbs, Croatians, Bosnians, Slovenians, Montenegrins and Macedonians. It was the beginning of a brutal tyranny and dictatorship under Milosevic. It will take him four years to turn Yugoslavians against each other in a bloody war which main objective was ethnical cleansing. In 1991 the Serbian Army and paramilitary organizations attacked and occupied Croatian towns of Vukovar and Vinkovci. They held the parts of Croatian territory occupied and terrorized its people for the next four years until Croatia’s Army liberates whole Croatia from Serbian troops in 1995 in operations Storm and Thunder. In 1992 Serbian troops attacked and sieged Sarajevo, the capital of Bosnia. For the next three and half years the city of Sarajevo has been bombed and terrorized. In 1995 under the command of Mladic and Karadzic, the Serbian soldiers committed genocide in Srebrenica, Bosnia, by systematically killing over eight thousand Bosnian Muslim men and boys. In 1998 Milosevic continued his politics of ethnic cleansing towards Albanians, which he started in 1987, in Serbia’s southern province of Kosovo (today an independent country). As a consequence, the NATO bombed Serbia in 1999, in order to stop Milosevic and his destructive politics. After several months of bombing, Milosevic finally agreed to step down. He was arrested on October 5th, 2001 and sent to International Court in Hague. In 2001 Serbia got its new president, Kostunica. It turned out Kostunica has had the same ideas and intentions as Milosevic. There were no more wars but nothing else has changed in the country or people’s lives. The misery and despair continued to devastate the people of Serbia. And Milosevic’s and Kostunica’s failing idea of denying every evil they have produced and dividing people of their country on patriots and traitors went deep into the lives of ordinary families who once led a peaceful life of brotherhood and unity.

This book is about those families, one in particular, who couldn’t resist becoming a victim of the system. It’s about all those multi-ethnical families who fell under the spell of fake nationalism and had let it destroy them for good. It’s about all those multi-religious families who let the system and their own churches convince them that their biggest sin ever was forming such a mixed institution, a marriage where two or more religions unite. This is a story of normal people going insane.

 

Denial, division, depression

 

Denial is the most typical characteristic of a country in the middle of the Balkans peninsula, Southeast Europe. It’s been 18 years since the worst crime was committed anywhere on the Old Continent after World War II. The crime was committed by Serbia, the country of denial. It was a systematically planned genocide with exact start, duration and end. And still, that same country’s government refuses to admit it. It keeps denying and blaming everybody else. But what’s more frightening than that is that it’s not just the government who has to admit it. It’s that country’s people who have to but won’t. Majority of Serbia’s population does not believe that genocide happened. Majority does not want to accept it has happened under their nation’s name. Majority keeps denying.

Sometimes one gets a feeling as if, in Serbia, the first thing parents teach their child is to deny. Denial has become so common in everyday life of a family in Serbia (no matter of its nationality because we’re taking geographical position in concern more than just one nation) that it has taken over its life. We hear about the same denial in the news, on the streets, from our neighbors and our relatives. It would be unimaginable if an individual wouldn’t adopt the same way of thinking as the society he’s living in. Only a few can resist oblivion and will never forget or deny what has happened, not just in their country, but in their lives as well. The rest will continue burying their own mistakes as well as their country’s mistakes apparently as long as they live. And then, there’s a certain type of individuals who know what happened in the war and will admit it publicly, making sure the facts of government’s mistakes are spread throughout some of the more independent media. However, they will fail to admit their own personal failures in life.

Another typical characteristic is division between people. Serbia is known as a divided country. It is divided between so called “patriots” and “traitors”. Some like to call it First Serbia and Second Serbia, respectively. Everybody who admits the genocide happened, and that it was the Serbian government who was the aggressor in the wars of the nineties, is a traitor. The rest are obviously patriots, since they firmly believe their country is a holy land, and their nation “by God chosen people”. Again, it’s a characteristic many people adopt in their life towards their family. A father will turn against his son or vice versa just because it’s in the air, all that negativity. It’s a strange mentality those Balkan people have there. It is a mentality of mental illnesses.

The northern province of Serbia, called Vojvodina, is a plain land filled with fields of corn and sunflower. It is the most mixed province considering nationalities.  The area holds the biggest number of families of mixed origins. Unfortunately, however, it also holds the highest number of suicides, not just in the country, but in whole Europe. What is the reason? It could be any of this country’s characteristics mentioned above. It could also be because something negative is simply in the air.

 

Anti-patriot

 

They asked a boy who willingly abandoned his homeland why he left his country and why he detests it so much. The answer he gave them was simple: denial. He hated denial and he couldn’t deal with it. The worst is when it comes from somebody close to you, from your own family. Weather it’s about a denial of an atrocity or just simply the denial of their abuse towards others, weather physical or verbal, it is hard to make peace with it, he said. He couldn’t make peace with constantly hearing the same denial, living in the same divided world. He couldn’t live in such a surrounding. And why should he? Why should he have to stay and live where he was born? They say, you’re right, but coming back to visit is something you ought to do. Why? Why go and visit something he detest with all his soul?  No, thank you. He has found his own haven. He has found his salvation in another country, friends and family in another nation. And because his new nation accepted him so warmly, he doesn’t want to leave her even in his dreams.  But he does sometimes. The old place is still haunting him in his dreams, turning them into nightmares. It’s a trauma cut deeply into his mind that he can’t get rid off, at least not that easily or by himself. That’s why he started seeing a psychotherapist. But things won’t change much unless those in question take the same step as he did - seek professional help so they could liberate themselves from themselves.

Being born in a family of mixed races, nationalities or religions, is a curse in Serbia. There is more trouble waiting for children of mixed origins than for those of a pure nation, preferably Serbian. Such family comes across extreme difficulties in public life. They come across racial discrimination and national chauvinism. The worst is when these difficulties occur inside the same family, when one member of it turns against the other for the same discriminatory reasons, when love turns into hate. Is there even a reason for such a thing? Is there a firmly founded reason for a husband to turn against his wife for being of other nationality?

Let’s take an example of a mixed family in northern part of Vojvodina. The wife is of Serbian nationality and husband of Croatian and Hungarian origins. Both were born in Serbia. Both of their ancestors were born in Serbia going at least 200 years in the past. Their two sons were born in this cursed land at a very wrong time – the nineties. Were they also born in a wrong family? Are they of a wrong mixture of nations?


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