Apple of my Eye
There's this guy
So cute but a bit shy
He got eyes as wonderful as the sky
We exchanged glances
made me want to fly
His smile is as sweet like an apple pie
His presence gives me my freaking high
He got my attention
don't ask me why
He turned out to be the apple of my eye
My smile tells it all
And that I can't deny
I like him immensely
And that I cannot lie
If I'll fall in love
maybe to him I want to try
Thus, my beating heart is all that's left to rely.
04/10/15
floralonskie
Submitted: April 10, 2015
© Copyright 2023 floralonskie. All rights reserved.
Comments
I'm really feeling poetry lately. Good job! :}
Fri, April 10th, 2015 12:32pm
Author
Reply
THANK YOU! :)
Fri, April 10th, 2015 5:33am
You really have a talent here. So sweet and inspiring. You make me smile. Good job!!!
Fri, April 10th, 2015 2:12pm
Author
Reply
Oh my! You're making me smile, too Alyson! THANK YOU! ^_^
Fri, April 10th, 2015 7:14am
It's very cute, new love is always sweet :D
Fri, April 10th, 2015 2:43pm
Author
Reply
THANK YOU! :) I'll be posting more poems. Keep in touch. ^_^
Fri, April 10th, 2015 7:54am
Okay, since i really do suck with poetry I don't think my comment will be very helpful,but here it goes. This poem was really sweet and it really does express your feelings. I like it a lot. Good job and keep it up :)
Fri, April 10th, 2015 4:47pm
Author
Reply
Hey Shiwang! You know what? Simply giving your feedback is a great help already. I appreciate the fact that you tried your best giving a sweet feedback about my piece. THANK YOU! :)
Fri, April 10th, 2015 9:52am
This is nice! I like it.
Fri, April 10th, 2015 11:32pm
Author
Reply
THANK YOU! I'm glad to know you liked it. :)
Fri, April 10th, 2015 7:42pm
Very cleaver. Really enjoyed this.
Sat, April 11th, 2015 4:03am
Author
Reply
I bet you mean clever? Thank you!I'm glad you enjoyed reading my piece. :)
Fri, April 10th, 2015 9:21pm
That was very touching! I like the feeling of being high and wanting to fly! Especially when it's a feeling of love.
Sun, April 12th, 2015 6:38am
Author
Reply
THANK YOU DLCannon! :) That thing called LOVE just gives us those kind of feeling along the way and it feels so good, right? ^_^
Sat, April 11th, 2015 11:45pm
maau naman kaayo ka sa tanan mu suwat flor uip ^_^
Wed, May 6th, 2015 4:26pm
Author
Reply
Haha :-D Thank you :-P
Thu, May 7th, 2015 5:07pm
Very, very nice and sweet!
Fri, May 8th, 2015 4:17am
Author
Reply
Thank you! :-)
Thu, May 7th, 2015 11:09pm
Great poem, it really brings out the feelings that went into writing it.
Mon, September 14th, 2015 10:19am
I like this one. Nice flow and rhythm. Keep it up!
Tue, October 6th, 2015 3:38am
Your emotions are clearly evident by the context of your wording, and it is a pleasurable read. I could, however, connect much easily if you didn't try forcing as much of it to rhyme and instead, allowed for a more nature flow.
When writing poetry, short stories or other works, if you force your words and try to use the words that you don't fully understand or know; then, your piece can become broken. Your audience won't necessarily understand what you are saying or how to feel.
So, my recommendation, take a deep breath and relax. Look at all of the possible words you can use, and use the one word that works best for the meaning of your piece and the feelings you want your audience to experience by reading your piece.
Lovely work! Keep it up1
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flamestowater
That's really sweet! :)
Fri, April 10th, 2015 7:50amAuthor
Reply
THANK YOU! :)
Fri, April 10th, 2015 12:53am