That bloody spider in my bath.

That bloody spider in my bath. That bloody spider in my bath.

Status: Finished

Genre: Humor

Details

Status: Finished

Genre: Humor

Summary

The passing of a spider, how sad.

Summary

The passing of a spider, how sad.

Content

Submitted: September 07, 2016

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Content

Submitted: September 07, 2016

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Why is there a spider swimming in my bath?
Playing with my rubber duck, it's the most fun he's
ever had.  I wanted to jump right in after a hard and
tiring day. Please gods make this fat hairy-legged
spider go away.

I couldn't find a beaker to catch the bugger in, so
I used an empty Mc-Vitie's biscuit tin. I think he
saw me coming as he dived below the waves. I
watched with some amusement at his tiny
air-bubble wake.

My amusement turned to sadness when his little
air-bubbles stopped and like a flat pointed star,
he floated to the top. I felt sure I'd seen him before
in my garden shed I hoped he was a lucky critter
and he wasn't dead.

I would have given him the kiss of life, but it was
impossible you see, anyway given a choice I don't
think he really liked me. I rescued him on a smelly
used old sock, I know it wasn't ideal, but that was
all I'd got.

I left him by the fire and went for my long awaited
bath, I thought the warmth might help the chap,
wake up and have a laugh. I rushed through my
ablutions I was keen to see how he was, constantly
wondering if he was alive or had he gone to God? 

My armchair was ablaze and the room was full of
smoke, my old sock had caught fire and fried the
little bloke. I had a tear in my eye when I told
my wife, she said “Never mind darling that blood
spider was the plague of my life.”

At last I go something right!


© Copyright 2017 Desmo. All rights reserved.

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