The Lies We Live

The Lies We Live

Status: In Progress

Genre: Romance

Details

Status: In Progress

Genre: Romance

Summary

This is a story about an erotica writer named Maddison and a social media influencer/musician name Orion. Both in their 30s and dealing with Writer's block. Maddison rents a place in Connecticut that she's rented before to vacation with her husband and to write some of her stories. She decides to invite Orion who is having trouble song writing. All is going pretty well until his ex shows up.

Summary

This is a story about an erotica writer named Maddison and a social media influencer/musician name Orion. Both in their 30s and dealing with Writer's block. Maddison rents a place in Connecticut that she's rented before to vacation with her husband and to write some of her stories. She decides to invite Orion who is having trouble song writing. All is going pretty well until his ex shows up.

Chapter1 (v.1) - Maddison POV

Author Chapter Note

Each chapter is written from a main character's point of view<br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> *Thanks for your patience. I decided to delete the first version and repost as well as add the second chapter. I'm in Texas and finally got my power and water so YAY!!!*

Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: February 23, 2021

Reads: 139

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Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: February 23, 2021

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The sound of snoring woke me up.

 I opened my eyes and looked at the still, sleeping man I just been intimate with. Though his breathing was noisy, his face was peaceful. When I reached out to caress his face, the moonlight reflected off my wedding ring. I felt tears begin to swell in my eyes. Slowly, I removed his hand from around my waist and slid off the bed, taking care as to not to wake him up.

I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor, slipped it on and hurried to the bathroom where I emptied the contents of my last meal into the toilet bowl. I pushed the button to flush and wiped the tears from my eyes on my arm. This was the second time I vomited this weekend.

I should probably start from the beginning.

Friday morning, I arrived in the beautiful state of Connecticut. I am a writer suffering from one of the worst things every writer has dealt with.

Writer’s block.

I actually live in Colorado. It’s a great state but sometimes a change in scenery is necessary for an artist.

I chose to go back to a rental I had stayed at many times before.

It was a carriage house with two floors, two bedrooms and one bathroom that the owners decorated to make it look like a rustic cottage. It had beadboard ceilings, a white slipcover couch with blue stripe pillows and other faux worn, shabby chic furnishings. It was on the property of a large home with cedar siding. Both the home and the carriage house had amazing views of the beach and the ocean.

The moment I arrived, I unpacked, showered, dressed in my comfy clothes, before grabbing a bottle of wine from the wine fridge in the kitchen. I sat on balcony with bottle of wine and my laptop. I had a whiskey neat before the flight. Ok, 2 whiskey neats, but I was still a bit shaky. Some say noon is too early to drink but I hate flying. Drinking helped with my nerves.

 This balcony had a great view which made it my favorite spot in the entire house. Apparently, there was once a window in the hallway on the wall where the balcony doors now stood. I saw the pre-renovation pictures; the balcony was a great addition. After draining 2 glasses of wine, I finished the first draft of chapter 2 and moved on to chapter 3. While trying to find another word for dick that didn’t sound too Danielle Steele, my phone buzzed. I received a message from Orion on the social media app.

Orion and I had been talking infrequently for months. He was a social influencer. His social media posts were a combination of sarcastic commentary, off color jokes and rage toward those whom he felt were just plain stupid. He had a low tolerance for ignorance and stupidity but even he acknowledged that watching people who proved Darwin’s law helped further his career.

What his almost eight-hundred thousand fans didn’t know, other than what he looked like, was that he was also the voice and musical talent behind, ‘When I’m Sober’. Beautifully sung songs filled to the brim with emotion, supported by the keys of a keyboard. Orion was not a fan of showing his face online due to his concern of being stalked or even worse; swatted. His songs were uploaded to several video and music platforms with only a black screen showing the name of the song.  I remember messaging him about a song called, ‘When You Kiss Me in the Morning’ and he revealed to me that it was him singing and playing the keyboard. He made me swear to secrecy and we actually wrote a song together. I didn’t want any credit; I was just happy to be able to help.

He too was having writer’s block. So, wanting to sound helpful, I invited him up to Connecticut with me. He was a southern man, not much older than me, that lived in the gorgeous state of South Carolina. Even though we talked a bit online, we really didn’t know each other very well so I expected him to politely decline.

He didn’t.

He accepted the invitation. His text was letting me know that he was planning on being here later tonight. Since carriage house was keyless, I texted him the code to get inside in case I was asleep. I sent him the address and told him that he could have the bedroom on the left side of the bathroom.

I called my husband to let him know about Orion. Of course, he had no problem with it. My husband and I were not jealous people. Sometimes he went on work trip with his co-workers, some of them female.  We trusted each other. He also knew that artists supported other artists. My hubby thought maybe we could inspire each other and break through the writer’s block. Honestly, I am lucky to have such a supportive husband.

I was feeling tipsy. As I began drinking a fourth glass of wine, I started to notice some typos. I shut my computer after correcting about fifteen of them. No point in continuing to add to the grammar issues I would need to fix tomorrow, but at least I got a few chapters in on my first day here.

I heard a car in the driveway. I was feeling a bit sluggish but I forced myself to stand up from my chair to look over the rail. It was Orion. He had a military style duffle bag on his back and was pulling a large keyboard from the trunk of his station wagon. I didn’t think anyone drove station wagons anymore. Didn’t they stop making those? With the money he makes online, I expected something more modern; more expensive. I called out to him. His name came out like a harsh whisper. Orion looked up at me and we waved at each other.

It wasn’t until he went to open the door that I realized the mistake I just made. I just invited the devil into my happy place.

Maybe I should I clarify.

Orion is a pretty decent looking guy, at least from what I’ve seen of him during our video chats but in all honestly his looks really don’t matter. Not to his fans anyway since they’ve never seen his face. Even the women he dated had no idea who he really was. He uses a different name when he uses dating apps. Him being a faceless online presence isn’t really a deterrent as I have read some of the comments on his social media. There were plenty of women out there wouldn’t mind sleeping with him. Again, that’s just based on his attitude and his voice. I’ve seen some of these women and they are basically full figure, porn star looking sex kittens.

My measurements are 36-29-42. I’m not skinny but I’m not fat either.

My hair is usually tied up in a messy ponytail or just loose and messy. I am known to spend the day writing in sweat pants, hoodies or just a t-shirt that falls just below my butt while wearing cute booties. Nothing about me screams sex kitten or porn star though my husband would vehemently disagree as he always finds a reason to rub his hands all over my body or fuck me senseless. Maybe it was the alcohol, but I did not feel confident enough to stay under the same roof as Orion.

Orion had a brutally honest and sometimes, cruel personality. His treatment of women was no different but hey, that’s equality. He could be pretty harsh against the women he felt were clout chasers, lazy and those that lacked intelligence and common sense. He had no issue with sex workers but would mock and ridicule women who sold their panties, their pee as well as those that were lazy in bed. The sudden fear of ending up as another ridiculed woman in one of his videos made me nauseous.

One might think that because I wasn’t a sex worker or sleeping with him that I didn’t need to worry about that, but just because I wasn’t, didn’t mean I was immune. I could name 13 women he roasted in videos that brought in nearly 1.5 million views each and he didn’t sleep with any of them.

Dammit.

I tried to run to my bedroom to at least put on a robe since I was wearing just a t-shirt and booties, but he caught me in the hall as he was coming up the stairs.

“Maddison?”

I stopped so suddenly that I tripped on the rug in the hallway and fell backwards. Luckily, yet painfully, my laptop fell on my stomach. I was able to keep the glass from breaking but the angle in which I was holding it caused the remaining wine to spill all over my face.

Great. This was a great way to meet someone for the first time. Absolutely terrific.

“Maddie? Are you alright?” He leaned his large keyboard up against the wall before coming over to help me up.

“I’m alright.” I tried to reassure him.

Orion came behind me to help me to my feet. I began to wobble. He held me in his arms until I found my footing. He smelled of chamomile and oranges. I turned around and thanked him for his help. When I took a step back, I noticed that he stood much taller than me.

“Never took you for a woman who wore white panties.”

“Oh my gosh…”

“Don’t worry. I’m a gentleman. I won’t tell anyone.” He laughed and picked up his keyboard.

My cheeks burned as I walked to my bedroom door. My hand on the handle, I turned around and asked, “You think about women’s panties?”

“No, but panties tell you a lot about a woman.”

“What do mine say about me?” I asked hesitantly.

“Well, I couldn’t really tell the style but from what I saw I would say that you are content and comfortable. You’re safe, not at all fussy. You don’t seem to care about beauty standards which is a bit surprising since you are an erotica author. I expected you to look like the women you wrote about in your stories.”

“Disappointed?”

“Curious.”

“Good night Orion.”

“Turning in so soon? It’s half past 10.”

“Blame it on the wine.”

“Are you drunk?”

“No. Just tipsy.”

“Awfully rude to invite me all this way and not keep me company at least for a little while.”

“Fine. Let me take a quick shower. Meet downstairs?”

“Alright, see you in a bit.”

I went into my room and started to take off my clothes. That was so embarrassing. I couldn’t believe I did that. The shower would sober me up. Showers always did. Once naked, I dressed in my white terry cloth robe so I could walk through the hall to the bathroom. I wonder what he’d say about my robe. He’d probably tell me I was boring. I went to the dresser, pulled out a drawer and looked down at my clothes.

Jeez.

I think I packed one pair of jeans and one dress. Everything else was either sweats or an oversized shirt. I guess I am comfortable. Then again, I’m in a happy, healthy marriage. Sure, I dressed up on occasion, but my hubby seemed completely fine with the way I dressed. I did see an article in magazine about ways to keep the spark in your marriage, but my hubby was the type that would have sex with me right after waking up. Drool and morning breath didn’t deter him at all.

Maybe I could put a little more sex appeal into my clothing. Nope. Nevermind. There was no one I needed to impress. I decided against wearing panties and chose a cute pair of pink jogger sweats, a t-shirt, socks, and a sports bra.

When I opened my door, I heard Orion hitting the keys on the keyboard in frustration. I guess he already unpacked.  I scurried to the bathroom so I could take a nice hot shower. Not being a fan of strong scents, I used the vanilla body wash I had packed. Once I was sure I had washed all the embarrassment off my body and out of my hair, I proceeded to scrub my face.

All clean.

I turned off the shower and got dressed. After tossing my clothes in the hamper in my room, I decided to wear my robe over my clothes and went down stairs to see Orion staring at his phone.

“You won’t get any songs written like that.”

“I’m stuck.”

I took a seat on an oversized slipcover white chair and asked him to play what he had so far.

“Ok, ok.”  He went back to standing behind his keyboard and placed his fingers on the keys. I watched his fingers dance across the keys as he sang:

“Oh baby,

I dream of me and you.

Our bodies sleep on earth,

But our souls dance on the moon.”

He stopped playing and looked over me. I’ve heard him sing online but it was very different hearing him in person. His voice was even better in person, but the lyrics were a bit rough.

“A poem?” I asked.

“Kinda. Those words just came to me and I had to write them down. I just don’t know where to go from here.” He walked past me and into the small open kitchen. He opened a jar of something that looked like plant leaves.

“What’s that?”

“Chamomile flowers, dried sliced orange peel and Kumaon white tea.”

“Oh, so that’s why you smell of chamomile and oranges.”

He stopped putting the tea into a linen tea bag and gave me a questioning look. “No, but I love the combination so much that I had a friend make the tea into bar soap for me.” He went back to preparing the tea. There was a teapot on the stove that he used to heat up the water. “You smelled me?”

I shook my head. “No. Not like that. Not in a creepy, pervy way. I just noticed the scent when you helped me up earlier.”

Orion smirked at me and brought over a mug of tea. “Try this.” He took a sip of his and passed me the other mug. I brought the mug to my nose first. It smelled so good, even I would bathe in this. I moved the mug to my mouth took a drank. It tasted as good as it smelled. He went back to his keyboard and sighed.

He raised a finger. “What about this?”

His fingers danced across the keys as he began to sing again.

“Honey there’s no light out tonight, yeah.

But in your eyes, I’m seeing stars.

There’s no other place I wanna be.

Nowhere way too far

When I go to sleep.

I dream of you and me.”

The music stopped. He picked up his mug and held it in his hands as if he were trying to warm them. He took a few sips while looking to me for my opinion.

“You want my honest opinion?” I asked him.

“Honest opinion.”

“Sounds a bit cliché. I don’t know if you’re tired, but the song lacks emotion. The words are nice but there’s nothing there. It doesn’t sound like you. It sort of sounds like a manufactured country pop song.”

He stopped drinking his tea and gave me a look that made me wonder if I went too far.

“Almost the exact same words Brie said.” He resumed drinking.

Brie was his manager. She was in charge of getting his music out there while keeping his identity hidden. She did a pretty good job in doing so. Such a good job that she made me sign a non-discloser document so that if I ever revealed his identity, I would be sued into homelessness. Brie was a damn good manager.

“Maybe you should get some sleep. I rented this place for a week so unless you have to finish this in the next day or so, you should probably rest.”

“I’ll sleep later.”

“Well, I’m gonna head to bed now.” I lifted myself up from the chair.

“Wine getting to you or old age?”

The half empty mug almost flew from my hand to his head. At 36, I was a bit sensitive about my age. Sure, I was attractive, I still got hit on from time to time and my sex drive was very high, but I was nearing 40. That really bothered me because I still felt 23.

“I’m heading off to bed, Orion. Maybe use that frustration to write a decent verse.” I sat the mug in the sink before going up the stairs to my bedroom. The really childish part of me wanted to slam the door. I decided to be the adult that I was and shut the door quietly instead. I didn’t want him to know that his words bothered me. Orion was closer to 40 than I was but men didn’t age like women did. Older men seemed to attract the hot young girls while we women either attracted guys with Mrs. Robinson fantasies or men close to death, wanting a little fun with someone before they croaked.

I locked my door, retreated to the bed, and buried myself under the thick and heavy blankets. I could still smell the chamomile and orange as I drifted off to sleep with the sound of Orion tapping the keys downstairs.

 

I woke up with a minor headache. Nothing a little pain medicine couldn’t fix. I tend to keep pain medicine on me since I am always staring a computer screen. I felt a burning sensation in my lower belly and looked at the time.

It was 10AM. Pee. I really needed to pee. Thankfully, I slept in my robe last night, so I wouldn’t have to waste any time trying to find it this morning. I slid off the bed and walked out of the bedroom. I heard the shower running. I cursed myself for inviting Orion to a place that only had one bathroom. The need to pee was becoming painfully unbearable. I was about to knock on the door, but I heard the water stop. A few moments later, I greeted by Orion who was wearing nothing but a towel. His skin was still wet, accentuating the muscles on his body. I found myself staring at his model like body.

I am not a fan of men with muscles although I write some of my male leads that way. Orion was not overly muscular. He didn’t have the body of someone who treated the gym like a church, but his body was very tone. He was quite fit. Admiring his physique almost made me forget I had to pee.

“Are you done with the bathroom?”

“Yea, go on ahead.”

I rushed into the bathroom, shutting the door with a loud slam accidently.

“This one-bathroom thing might be a problem.” I heard him say as I emptied my bladder. I silently agreed.

After relieving myself, I washed my hands and went back to my room to change into jeans and a t-shirt. It was actually my husband’s shirt. My husband is a bit bigger than me, so the shirt hit me mid-thigh. I was sitting on the sofa looking through the options of a food delivery app when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned my head back and gave Orion, dressed in a t-shirt and jeans as well, a questioning look.

“Why not just go out for breakfast?”

“I want to try to get some writing done today. I really don’t need a distraction.”

He took my phone out of my hand and powered it off. “I have never been this far north before. Let’s go out somewhere for breakfast. You pick, I pay.”

“Avoiding the keys?”

“I just thought since you brought me out here, you could at least show me around. You know? Since you’ve been here before.”

I rolled my eyes at him. “What? No videos to fill the time?”

“Taking a break until I get this song written. Told my subscribers I was going on a little vacation and to amuse themselves with my older stuff. Come on! Go get your shoes.”

I groaned as I got up off the couch. I went back to my room to put on my sneakers. I went back downstairs to see him waiting at the door, car keys in hand.

He drove like a madman as I gave him direction to Alabaster. It was a casual place that did brunch and dinner. We decided to sit at one of the tables outside. I wanted to order a mimosa but ordered an orange juice, french toast, and turkey bacon instead. Orion ordered a screwdriver and a stack of pancakes made with crumbled bacon.

We sat there for a while, easting in silence, enjoying the view of the water. Orion guzzled down his screwdriver, then waved the waitress over to request a coffee.

“So, what does your husband think of your stories?”

“He thinks it’s pretty neat that I make money writing about sex; writing about so many types of people and the situations they get themselves into.” I shoved another piece of french toast in my mouth.

“Some of your stories are hardcore. Like the one you wrote one about girl getting gang-banged at a bar then going home to ride her vibrator until her leg went numb. You know, that actually would make a for a good porn script.”

I shushed him. I didn’t want everyone around me knowing that I wrote smut for a living. Sure, we’ve progressed as a society and while one would hope to be surrounded by open minded individuals, I didn’t feel like being judged this early in the morning. Maybe I should have ordered that mimosa.

“I actually tried out one of your stories before.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, but I wasn’t trying to act out your entire story, just one scene. That one story where the guy is dominant and plows a girl on the dining table.”

“Ah, one of my tamer stories.” I laughed.

“I thought so, but when I tried to set up another date with her, she said she didn’t think she could keep up with my sex style. Style, like we were out shopping or something.” He scoffed. He waved the waitress back over to ask for the check.

“I guess she wasn’t a fan of yours.”

“I have a very strict rule. I do not, for any reason, no matter how hot, date my fans.”

“Why not?”

“Too messy. What girl wants to have to sign a non-disclosure agreement before dating a guy? If I piss her off, contract be damned. She can still tell whatever news group or gossip rag that’ll pay her, all about my personal life.” He pulled out his wallet and paid in cash. He also left a decent size tip.

“So, you’re single then?”

“Yes and no. There’s this girl that I used to date years. We broke up about 6 years ago; we were just too different, you know? We still have a very bad habit of hooking up now and then. Sometimes we think about getting back together. I mean, we try hard, but we always end up back as friends with benefits.”

We made our way back to his car. He drove us back to the carriage house.

“You love her?” As soon as I said the words, I wish I could have taken them back. Talk about invasion of privacy. “Sorry. You don’t have to answer that. It’s none of my business.”

“Nah, it’s ok. Looking back, I can’t say it was love. I thought it was once upon a time; I even said those 3 words. I went into my savings to buy her a ring, but the relationship was unhealthy. I was an alcoholic with too many addictions, and she was addicted to whatever she could snort up her nose or shoot up her arm. I got sober but it took her a lot longer to get clean. Drugs and other vices aside I guess you could say we were addicted to each other.”

“Wait. Are you allowed to drink?” I asked remembering him drinking a screwdriver.

He pulled into the driveway and parked. “I have much better control than before. My music and my online presence have made me accountable in a weird way. So many people have their eyes on me. I was in a bad place back then. With my current social status, it could really fuck things for me if I fell hard again.”

“There’s a song there.” I told him as we got out the car and walked together towards the house.

“What inspires you to write?” He asked, changing the subject.

“Well, I’ve been writing since I was a little girl. I knew that it was something I wanted to do with my life.  I fell into writing erotica because of my love of sex. Sex, just like writing, is an art; a way for us to express ourselves and our emotions.  I try not to write just pure smut. Each one of my characters has a deeper need than just the physical.”

“Ok…explain the girl with the 10 guys. What was she needing other than dick?” I shook my head at him as I took a seat on the couch while he fixed a cup of tea.

“You read the story. She was recently divorced and feeling insecure about herself. Her masturbating at the end of it was her freeing herself. This was a woman who lived her entire life for her husband. When he left her, she was shattered. She had put all she was into loving and supporting him. In the end, after having sex with all those men, she figured out that her self-worth did not depend on a man but on her.”

He nodded as he walked over to his keyboard. He sat the steaming cup on the small table beside the sofa and before playing a different melody.

“She is the poison in my veins.

But I can’t stop it.

I can’t quit her.

I know there’s no one I can blame.

I am broken.

We are shattered.

Just give me one more hit

This is the last time.

But I am a liar.

I can’t get away from this.

I’m addicted.

She’s like a blade across my wrists.

She leaves me fading.

I can’t follow.

Some say ignorance is bliss.

My eyes were open.

My soul was bothered.

Just give me one more hit

This is the last time.

But I am a liar.

I can’t get away from this.

I’m addicted.

I’m addicted.”

“Wow.” I stared in amazement as he leaned back against the wall, drinking his tea. “It’s like hearing the confession of a broken heart still longing for the one it used to beat for.”

“You’re not planning on turning my story into an erotica, are you?”

“I don’t write tragedies.” I laughed. Then our eyes met. Normally, I have no problem looking someone in the eye. I have made eye contact with Orion many times since he’s been here but now, it felt weird; almost uncomfortable, so I adverted my gaze by looking down at his keyboard instead.

“I think I like what just happened. Probably gonna spend the day fine tuning this.” He smiled and it was like he cast a spell. I couldn’t take my eyes away from his smile, but I had to.

“Sounds good. I look forward to hearing it when you’re done.” I got off the couch and made my way to the stairs to my room. Once I locked the door, I called my husband.

“Hey sweetheart! How’s the writing going?” He said after picking up on the 4th ring.

“I’m getting some chapters done. About to go look them over and edit them.”

“Drinking and writing?”

“Writing and drinking.”

“Well, as you’ve told me before, the first draft is the easiest. It’s filling in the missing parts that’s the hard.”

“Yea...”

“You alright? You sound down. Don’t rush it. You always put too much pressure on yourself and you always end up with a good story.”

“I know.”

“So, Orion made it?”

“Oh, he did.”

“Not going so well?” He must have heard the frustration in my voice.

“He’s been keeping me up, but we’ve been talking about his life, and it looks like he may have made a breakthrough with his songwriting. He’s working on it now. I miss you. What’s going on with you?”

We talked about how his work was going. We reminisced about our last visit up here and how much fun we had at the beach. Before I knew it, an hour had passed, e hSadly we had to end the call so he could get some things ready for his meeting tomorrow. We said our goodbyes, told each other how much we loved and missed each other before hanging up.

I wanted to sleep more but there was editing to be done. I grabbed my laptop and went back to the balcony. Orion’s singing was giving me goosebumps. There was something haunting in his voice.  I need to focus. I sat in the chair, opened my laptop and went to work.

I really need to stop drinking when I write. The number of incomplete sentences, spelling issues and missing words was absolutely ridiculous. Three hours later, I was in serious need of a drink. I went back inside the house and went downstairs to the kitchen. The sound of snoring made me pause for a moment before slowly continuing to the kitchen.

I looked into the living room and saw Orion laying on the sofa.  On his lap was a notebook and on the floor was the pen he must have been writing with before he fell asleep. Snoring aside, he looked peaceful. He kind of reminded me of a baby. Cute when it’s asleep, hell on wheels when they’re awake.

 I slowly made my way into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, then quietly made my way back to the balcony. Halfway done with my water, my stomach growled. I ignored it. I only had a two more pages to edit.

The weather apparently agreed with my stomach. My ears caught the sound of the thunder from an oncoming storm. I looked around to see that the clouds were quickly turning gray. That was all the warning I needed. I grabbed my things and went inside before I ruined my computer and lost my story.

I heard the sound of the toilet flushing and water flowing from a faucet.

Orion was awake. Maybe he would be hungry. I went downstairs and actually looked in the fridge. There were some apples and oranges along with the bottle waters but that was it. I looked in the pantry. There was sandwich bread, boxes of pasta and a few jars of pasta sauce. I was so focused on my writing that I forgot to shop for food.

I could just order something.

Orion was coming down the stairs as I was looking through food delivery apps.

“Hey Orion, are you hungry?”

“A bit. Why?”

“It’s raining out, so I was thinking about ordering take-out.”

“No food in the house?”

“There’s fruit in the fridge; also some pasta in the pantry.”

“Why not go grocery shopping? Were you planning on ordering out for every meal for every day you were here?”

I scowled at him. He responded with laughter.

“I can order groceries on this app. They would be delivered in 3 to 4 hours.”

“Or we could go to the store, buy food, cook it here and eat in about 1 to 2 hours.”

“It’s raining out.” I protested.

“Well, darlin’, if you aren’t the wicked witch then a little rain shouldn’t bother you at all.”

He sat on the couch and began putting on his shoes.

“If you want to stay here, you could just give me a list of things you want.”

I gave in.

“Let me just get my shoes and we’ll go together.” I ran upstairs to grab my shoes from my room.

“By the way Maddison, you don’t have a car. How did you plan to get around? Or were you just gonna make me your taxi?” He shouted after me.

“Who takes a taxi anymore? I have 2 rideshare apps on my phone.”

With my shoes on and a jacket to keep me dry, we rushed out to his car to and headed to the store.

It was a nice market that also had an entire corner section dedicated to everything that was local to the state. I wanted to have my own cart, but Orion thought it was silly, so we shopped around until we felt like we had enough food for the entire week. I went to the deli and the butcher section where I got a few pounds of fish, some shrimp, lobster tails and chicken.

Orion was busy texting on his phone while I went to shop for produce.

“Your input would be nice since we’re shopping for food for both of us to eat.”

He looked up from his phone with a concerning look.

“Something wrong?” I asked.

“Uh… that depends.”

“On what? What’s with you?”

“That relationship I told you about earlier? The girl I was sort of dating?”

“Yeah, what about it?”

“She brought a plane ticket. She’s on her way here.”

“Umm…ok...” I said trying not to sound unreasonable or irritated. “Why didn’t you say something earlier?”

“I just found out. Apparently, she found out where I was from my neighbor. He usually keeps an eye on my place when I travel. Fuck! Look, I can get a hotel. I don’t want to screw you on fees. Rentals usually charge fees if they find out you have more people in the house than expected.”

I shook my head at him while trying to give him the most agreeable smile I could muster. “It’s not a bother.” I told said, but it felt like a lie. Something about this situation was bothering me. I just couldn’t put my finger on it.“Maybe this will help you more with your music. Do we have enough food for all three of us?”

He didn’t bother to look at the basket when he replied that we should, then again, I wasn’t really looking at him directly either. I couldn’t get my eyes off the kale in the basket. There was nothing interesting about the kale, it just kept me from looking into his eyes.

The rain stopped when we left the store. We drove home with music playing to fill the silence. Why was I feeling like this?

When we arrived back at the house, there was girl standing by the door with two suitcases and a large bag.

“Fenix…” Her name came out of his mouth like a groan.

“How did she get here so fast?”

“When she texted me, she had already arrived at the airport here.”

We both got out of the car. I watched as Fenix ran to Orion. She ran and jumped onto him causing him stumbled as she wrapped her legs around his waist and kissed him. From where I stood it looked like she was licking the insides of his mouth. Doing my best to ignore the spectacle, I began grabbing the groceries from the backseat.

“Why are you here?” He asked as he tried to get her to put her feet back on the ground.

“Just missed you.”

That was my cue to give them space. I headed to house with some of the groceries in my hands.  

“Who are you? Who is she?” She asked.

Her voice was grating. She reminded me of the bitchy characters from high school movies.

“Maddison!” He called out for me. I wanted to ignore him. I just wanted to get the food into the house and go to my room, but I turned around and silently cursed my politeness.

“Maddison, this is Fenix. Fenix, this is Maddison. She a writer. She’s helping me write a song.”

I guess Maddison would know about his music. I waved and gave a little hello. She grabbed Orion’s hand possessively as she looked me over.

Fenix was beautiful. Though she was thin, at least thinner than I was, it was difficult to believe she was once a hardcore drug addict. She looked healthy. She had a full bust but not so big that you’d think she’d tip over. Her brown hair was a little past her shoulders. Bettie Page bangs framed her face. Her ears were pierced from top to bottom with little diamond studs just like the one in her nose. Her tan skin made her green eyes pop and there were freckles on the bridge of her nose and across her cheeks.

“Hi.” She said before asking, “Are you sleeping with Ori?”

I felt my jaw drop. While Orion admonished her for asking such a question, I turned my attention back to the door and pushed the code into the keypad.

“I’m married.” I told her as I carried the groceries into the house. I hate being a nice person. I should have told Orion that I did not want her here. Other than the obvious issue of rental fees, I had no reason to deny her stay. I was happy I had a lock on my bedroom door. She seemed like the type of person that would stab you over and over again when you were sleeping with a big smile on her face.

Orion brought in the rest of the groceries and helped me put them away while Fenix whined about her luggage being so heavy.

“Why did you bring so much?” He asked.

“Well, Marcus said that you were going to be away for a week so I wanted to make sure I had what I needed. I packed a few surprises for you as well.” She made a noise in her throat that made my stomach lurch. I needed to be positive.

“I’m making halibut sandwiches, Fenix. Would you like one?”

“What kind of sandwich?” She raised an eyebrow.

It’s halibut, bacon, tomato, and lettuce.

“Pass. Do you have milk and cereal?” She plopped down on one of the over-sized chairs.

“I’ll pour you a bowl. Go try to get your luggage upstairs. My bedroom is left of the bathroom.” Orion pointed towards the stairs.

“Pass. Too heavy.”

Orion left the kitchen to take her luggage up the stairs for her instead. He told her to at least grab her bag and follow him upstairs. She giggled with the excitement of getting her way. While passing by me, Fenix gave me a weird look before following close behind him up the stairs.

It was going to be a long week. I quietly prayed that she didn’t stay that long.

After the groceries were put away, I started on dinner. Sandwiches were not a common dinner dish, but Halibut was a heavy enough fish to be filling. While baking the fish, I heard Orion and Fenix yelling at each other upstairs. I didn’t want to be a part of their drama, so I went to find my ear buds so I could listen to a playlist on my phone while I finished dinner. I even cut potatoes to make fries.

When I finished cooking, I went to the small dining table to eat while watching a podcast. I was halfway listening as I was mostly thinking of Orion. It must be lonely being him. Even though he didn’t have Hollywood celebrity status, he was still well known enough that those that knew of him and hated him, made his life difficult by trying to cancel him with articles written in a way that made him seem like a complete dick. Then there was his love life. Fame must make it hard to tell if people you date are really into you or your lifestyle. I met my husband in college before my writing really took off. Thankfully, I never had to think like that.

A podcast and a half later, I realized they had been upstairs for a long time. I sent him a message about dinner, put the other sandwich in the fridge and cleaned up my mess. When I went up the stairs to my room, I took out my earbuds. I was met with instant regret.

The banging on the wall, his grunting mixed with her expletives told me all I needed to know. I decided to skip my shower and went straight into my room. I knew I needed to write but I just wasn’t in the right headspace, so I changed into my sleepwear and got into bed.

I couldn’t sleep. Orion and Fenix had been going at it for about 3 hours. Sleep deprivation led to me playing a little game of counting the number of times Fenix screamed the words ’fuck’ and ‘harder’. So far ‘fuck’ was winning. After a while, I tried to tune them out with music. I even tried to work on my story but my mind kept drifting into that bedroom.

I knew Orion was a sexual person. He talked many times about some of the types of women he dated in his videos and podcasts. It was just different actually hearing him having sex with someone. I couldn’t help but wonder exactly what he was doing to make her scream and beg so loudly. I even wondered if she was being loud on purpose. Beneath all her yelling, I could hear Orion’s moans. Regardless of the noise she was making, he seemed to be enjoying himself.

I gave up trying to distract myself from what was going on and instead allowed my mind to imagine it. I thought about Orion. I thought about him, between her legs. His hands on her knees, keeping her legs open so he could watch her play with herself as he thrusted into her hard and deep. I thought about him pushing her up against the wall and pushing into her while wrapping her hair around his fist. Was he switching between her pussy and ass? Was he biting her neck while taking her from behind?

He seemed like the type to like it rough. There was no doubt in my mind that one of them was probably tied to the headboard.

I looked at my phone. This had been going on for 4 hours now. Talk about stamina. I went downstairs to grab a bottle of water. I was deciding if I wanted to eat the other sandwich I made, since Orion had his hands full. Then I heard footsteps. I looked up from the fridge. Orion coming into the kitchen wearing nothing except boxer briefs.

He was sweaty. His hair was matted to his head. Some loose strands were on seemingly stuck on  his cheeks and forehead. Seeing him like this made my heart skip a beat.

“Can you pass me two waters?”

I gave him the bottles of water then shut the fridge doo.

“Still up? Getting some writing in?” He opened one of the bottles and began drinking from it.

“Not really. I’m not in the right mindset to write. Too many distractions.”

Orion gulped. He looked at the stairs, then back at me. “Sorry. It just happened. I don’t mean to keep you up.”

“It’s fine. I get it. You two can’t help it. Maybe it really is love?”

“It’s something. Look, I know she’s loud. I’ll just gag her when I get back up there.”

I laughed quietly. “No need for that. Don’t go out of your way for me.”

“Oh, no. It’s no big deal. She brought a ball gag so I might as well use it.” He took another swig of his water.

I knew he was kinky. “Alright, well, I’m off to bed. You know, Orion, her being here may help with your song writing.”

I was walking up the stairs when he called my name. I turned back to him.

“I felt like we were starting to become, you know, real life friends but you’ve been distant since Fenix arrived. Are you sure we aren’t bothering you? Be honest.”

“Some of the best musical artists, the best song writers, performed and wrote from a place of pain and heartache. Having her here is a good thing for you.” I was trying to go back to my room when I felt his hand brush the back of my arm.

“You still haven’t told me what’s bothering you.”

I sighed. “For a little while, I wasn’t sure either.”

“So, tell me. What is it?”

“When you got here, I expected you to be different, more like your online persona. You’re still kind of a dick but nicer. I really like having you here. I care about you like I would any person I consider a friend. It bothers me to see you with Fenix because I know a bit about the history between you two. I know there are 2 sides to every story but I feel that if you keep going back to her, if you keep going backwards, then you’ll miss all the good that’s waiting in front of you.”

“You’re a glass half full kinda girl, aren’t you?”

“I appreciate the compliment.”

It might have been the smell of sex or maybe seeing him and knowing what he was doing with that woman in his room that made me feel something I knew I shouldn’t. Our eye contact lasted longer than it should have. I could still feel his touch on my arm. My heart beat sped up in that moment as I wondered what it would be like to trade places with Fenix. To feel the warmth of his body, to feel him inside me, on top of me, beneath me.

Usually when I’m writing a story, I abstain from sex. I use the pent-up energy and sexual frustration to help me write really graphic sex scenes. Maybe I just needed to get laid. I wondered if my husband would fly up for a day because phone sex was not going to do it for me.

“Oh yea, I got your message. If it’s alright with you, I’ll eat it later.”

“No big deal.”

“You didn’t have to cook for me, but you did. You didn’t have to invite me up here to help me either, but you did.  I appreciate it. The least I can do is eat the sandwich you made.”

“Ok…” My cheeks felt like they were burning. I needed to go back to my room. Now.

We walked up the stairs together, Orion a few steps behind me. When we got to the hallway, we said good night to each other. He went back into his room where Fenix was waiting. I went to the bathroom to fill the toilet with what was my dinner. I sat on the bathroom floor, silently praying that Orion was too engrossed in Fenix to hear me vomiting.

Anytime I feel guilty, nervous, or anxious, I vomit. It never fails. However, I couldn’t figure out what was making me so sick this time. We’re just two friendly people talking, hanging out and writing. We’re artists. We’re friends. There was nothing to feel anxious or guilty about or at least that’s what I tried to convince myself as I heaved into the toilet again. This was going to be a long night.

Morning came faster than a premature ejaculator. I didn’t sleep well. Between an upset stomach and hearing Fenix screaming all damn night, I kept dozing in and out. A shower would help me relax. Even though I slept in a t-shirt and sweatpants, I put on my robe. I decided to wear a dress today because it was going to be nice out. I headed for the shower only to find the bathroom was occupied. For fucks sake, this was giving me flashbacks of college. Did these two even stop fucking to eat or shit? The shower was running but I could hear Orion and Fenix enjoying themselves rather loudly.

Disgusted, I went back to my room, tired and irritated. A big part of me wanted to call for a maid service to come and clean the bathroom. I did not even want to pee in there until it was clean. This one-bathroom thing was officially a big problem. If they were going to act like rabbits, then a hotel might be necessary.

I took off my clothes and put on my dress. It was a simple floral dress, vintage from the 90s. I slipped on my denim jacket along with a white pair of slip-on tennis shoes. I got a rideshare. When the car arrived, Fenix and Orion were still in the shower.

Wow.

I was dropped off at the local market. It was nice area with mom-and-pop shops. I went to a café and ordered a large hot tea to go so I could continue to walk around exploring. I put in my ear buds and called my husband.

“Wait, so his girlfriend is there? Damn honey.” He began laughing at my situation.

“You should hear them. It’s like living in a porn studio. I’m not going to be able to do this for another day.”

“Honey, from what you told me about their relationship, this should be expected. I’m sure their little sexcapade won’t last too much longer. You’re an erotica author. Use this situation for inspiration.”

“It told him I wouldn’t.”

“Well, you don’t have to write it exactly like what you’re experiencing but I’m sure you can use something from this situation in a story.”

“Maybe…”

We talked a little longer before he had to return to work. I should have asked him to come up for a day. It’s not like he wouldn’t be able to. He owned the company.

I did some shopping. There was a beautiful store that sold hand sewn lingerie. I ended up buying a silk chemise in cream. I never wear such things but the woman in my current story did. Wearing it, feeling the material against my skin, and moving around in it would help me with my story. I’m similar to method actors. I did a lot of research for my writing.

I looked down at my phone. I had been gone for a few hours. My stomach growled. Maybe I should get something to eat before I went back to the house. Procrastination, I know. I went to Mimi’s to eat then I got another ride from the app. I hoped that Orion and Fenix were taking a break from screwing each other’s brains out. The last thing I wanted was to walk in on them having sex in the living room.

 

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