Journey to the Center of the Heart

Journey to the Center of the Heart

Status: Finished

Genre: Gay and Lesbian

Details

Status: Finished

Genre: Gay and Lesbian

Summary

Casey has been in love with his best friend, Grady, since they were in middle school. But Grady has always liked girls. Grady knows Casey is gay but is unaware of his friend’s secret love for him. When Grady mentions going to a dating chat room, Casey decides to mess with him and makes a fake screen name and poses as a girl, then PM’s Grady – intending to identify himself after a short chat. But when Grady starts to open up and show his romantic side, Casey is drawn in and can’t bring himself to let go of the fantasy. By the end of their first chat, Casey knows he’s made a huge mistake and needs to come clean as soon as possible, before Grady develops real feelings for this imaginary “girl”. But finally experiencing how it feels to be desired by the man of his dreams, and witnessing how happy Grady is after multiple unfulfilling relationships…Casey is finding it harder and harder to tell the truth and bring them both back to a reality that will not only rob them of their desired loves–but of their friendship as well.

Summary

Casey has been in love with his best friend, Grady, since they were in middle school. But Grady has always liked girls. Grady knows Casey is gay but is unaware of his friend’s secret love for him. When Grady mentions going to a dating chat room, Casey decides to mess with him and makes a fake screen name and poses as a girl, then PM’s Grady – intending to identify himself after a short chat. But when Grady starts to open up and show his romantic side, Casey is drawn in and can’t bring himself to let go of the fantasy. By the end of their first chat, Casey knows he’s made a huge mistake and needs to come clean as soon as possible, before Grady develops real feelings for this imaginary “girl”. But finally experiencing how it feels to be desired by the man of his dreams, and witnessing how happy Grady is after multiple unfulfilling relationships…Casey is finding it harder and harder to tell the truth and bring them both back to a reality that will not only rob them of their desired loves–but of their friendship as well.

Chapter1 (v.1) - Regretful Mistake

Author Chapter Note

Casey has been in love with his best friend, Grady, since they were in middle school. But Grady has always liked girls. Grady knows Casey is gay but is unaware of his friend’s secret love for him. When Grady mentions going to a dating chat room, Casey decides to mess with him and makes a fake screen name and poses as a girl, then PM’s Grady – intending to identify himself after a short chat. But when Grady starts to open up and show his romantic side, Casey is drawn in and can’t bring himself to let go of the fantasy. By the end of their first chat, Casey knows he’s made a huge mistake and needs to come clean as soon as possible, before Grady develops real feelings for this imaginary “girl”. But finally experiencing how it feels to be desired by the man of his dreams, and witnessing how happy Grady is after multiple unfulfilling relationships…Casey is finding it harder and harder to tell the truth and bring them both back to a reality that will not only rob them of their desired loves–but of their friendship as well.

Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: April 13, 2015

Reads: 1058

A A A | A A A

Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: April 13, 2015

A A A

A A A

Journey-pt%201_zpshldywyha.jpg

“A Regretful Mistake”

...................

 

You fucking moron. What did you do? How the fuck are you going to fix this?

Casey anxiously watched Grady add ingredients to his coffee cup as he talked non-stop about the girl he had met online the night before. It had been ages since the guy had been this excited over a prospective relationship, and Casey wasn’t sure he could remember a time when Grady had actually displayed this level of eagerness over anything.

“I’m telling you, Case,” Grady grinned and stirred his coffee, then sucked the spoon clean. A pleasant shiver skittered through Casey when the utensil slipped between Grady’s lips. Fuck, the man had the most sexy, kissable mouth ever. An unbidden throb began to thump in his crotch – and the recollection of last night’s events didn’t help any either. Grady walked over to the counter where Casey sat on a stool, and leaned on his elbows directly across from Casey, sipping his coffee. “She was amazing. We had this instant connection. After talking to her for just a few minutes, I felt like I’d known her all my life.”

Imagine that, Casey thought sickly and averted his eyes before Grady could detect the guilt churning therein. He cleared his throat. “Why do you have to go to an online chat room to find a chic?” he wondered. It wasn’t easy keeping his voice level, calm, casual…but luckily Grady was too preoccupied to notice the slight hitches. “I mean, you’re fucking hot. Girls practically follow you home in hoards every time you go out. It isn’t like you have a lack of options.”

Grady shrugged. “That’s the problem.”

“What?” Casey chanced a look at him. “Too many options? Oh, you poor thing.” He rolled his eyes and snorted.

“Hey,” Grady chuckled and cocked an eyebrow. “The only reason you don’t get dates is because you never leave your fucking apartment except to go to your classes. You have to socialize, baby, put it out there for people to see.”

You’re the only one I want to show it to, Casey thought as the anxiety and ‘ick’ feeling came back to his gut. But he couldn’t say that, not out loud, though he wondered if Grady was aware – or at least suspected – that his gay best friend had a thing for him. Surely he had to suspect it, as hot and sexy as he was. If he only knew how deep that ‘thing’ was…would he still feel at ease around Casey?

“That’s easy for you to say,” Casey muttered with a smirk. “You’re not a scrawny fag boy looking for love in all the wrong places.”

“Shit,” Grady nearly choked on his coffee, cleared his throat and shook his head. “Don’t say shit like that when I just take a drink.”

Casey chuckled and shrugged. “My bad.”

Clearing his throat again, Grady rubbed his hand over his mouth. “First of all, you’re not scrawny. And plenty of girls have told me what a cute, sexy friend I have.”

“And how does that help me?”

“Hey,” Grady held up a finger. “Girls happen to have very good taste when it comes to gay guys. Fuck, half of them are probably coming on to me just to get closer to you.”

Casey shook his head and smiled. “Well, I appreciate their votes of confidence, but again – how does that help me in the dating department?”

“I’m just saying,” Grady looked at him and grinned. Sometimes that ‘grin’ felt like a cruel twist of fate, encompassing everything Casey had ever wanted in a man, right there in front of him every day, close enough to touch – yet forever beyond his reach. “You’re a good looking guy. And believe it or not, there are other guys out there who think so, too. You just have to give them an opportunity to present themselves.”

Doubt pinched Casey’s face and he shrugged absently. “Yeah, whatever.” He twisted his own cup on the countertop. “But back to the original point. Why is having so many girls to choose from the problem?”

“It’s like this,” Grady said. “The girls I meet in person, probably a good ninety-nine percent of them just think I’m hot and want to get in my pants.”

“Aww,” Casey puckered his lower lip. “Poor, abused baby.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Grady laughed and lightly smacked Casey’s head. “I guess it would just be nice to know a girl liked me for me – and not just the exterior package.”

Oh, but what a delicious package it is, Casey groaned inwardly. “That’s pretty deep for a straight guy,” Casey smiled. “You sure you’re not a rainbow boy?”

“Hey, not all straight guys are just out for a good time,” Grady chuckled. “Some of us actually want something real, and…”

“And to be loved for who you are inside?” Casey sighed and held his hand to his heart. “You are so gay, my friend.” Maybe if he said it enough – it would come true.

Grady rolled his eyes and chuffed. “In your dreams, baby.”

Indeed, Casey confirmed silently, a slight squeeze to his heart. Every fucking night.

Casey cleared his throat. “So, uh, what’s the deal with this cyber girl? What is it about her that makes you feel like you’ve known her forever?”

“I don’t know.” A soft smile touched Grady’s lips and a lightly dreamy look crept into his eyes. “It’s like she…gets me, or something. I’ve never felt so in sync with a girl before. She’s like…” his lips twisted. “Like you with breasts.”

Casey flinched without meaning to and hurriedly recovered. “So you’re saying you’d date me if I had tits, is that it?”

“And a few other…physical adjustments,” Grady winked.

“Nope,” Casey shook his head. “I’m not making those changes, even for your sexy ass.” He grabbed his own crotch. “I need my man junk.”

Grady chuckled.

“So, do you know what this girl looks like?” Casey asked.

“No,” Grady said. “That’s the point. I don’t want to exchange pictures, not yet. I don’t just want her to get to know me for me before she sees what I look like…I want to get to know her for who she is, inside. I mean, it’s human nature to be swayed by appearance. And I think, too often, people pass over what could be an awesome relationship just because the other person doesn’t look just right.” Grady sipped his coffee and looked at Casey seriously. “I’m man enough to admit that most of my relationships – if you want to call them that – have been superficially based. The girls were hot, the sex was hot…but I don’t know, none of it really left me feeling satisfied…fulfilled.”

Casey gazed at him, wishing his lack of fulfillment was due to his need for a man’s touch. But he supposed that was a little too much to hope for. Truth was, Grady was a good guy and it didn’t surprise Casey that he wanted more than sex out of a relationship. He wasn’t a “behind-the-scenes” homosexual, but simply a decent straight guy looking for real love. And by the look in his eyes when he talked about this new girl…he believed he might have found it.

You are despicable, Casey berated himself. Never in his life had he suffered such an extreme case of self-loathing as he did at this moment. You just fucked your best friend – and not the good way, like in your dreams.

“What if she just…wants to be friends?” Casey proposed.

“No,” Grady smiled and shook his head. “She isn’t just looking for a friend. We talked about relationships and such, and like me, she wants more than just the surface stuff. It was nice being able to just open up and admit what I was really looking for in a relationship, in life. The girls I meet out here…I can’t get their attention off my cock long enough to have a conversation with them.”

Casey rubbed the back of his neck and stared at the counter. “She sounds…compatible,” he murmured.

“Compatible?” Grady laughed softly. “It’s way more than that. It’s like she’s…my soul mate.”

His throat squeezing, Casey closed his eyes as they began to sting. Breathing deep, he slowly raised his head and opened his eyes. “Soul mate?” he stared at Grady. “Don’t you think you might be jumping the gun a bit? You just started talking to her last night. I mean, maybe you should take a little more time to get to know her before you assume she’s the one. People aren’t always…” he glanced away, stomach grinding. “…what they appear.”

“I appreciate your concern, little buddy,” Grady grinned and reached over, ruffling Casey’s hair. “But I’ve got this. And she is for real. I can feel it. The things she says to me…it isn’t just fabricated jargon.”

At least that much is true.

Casey nodded slowly, releasing an unsteady breath. “When are you going to talk to her again?”

“Tonight,” Grady said, then chuckled. “We have a cyber-date.”

“Cyber-date?” Casey raised an eyebrow. “What do you do on a cyber-date?”

Grady shrugged and smiled. “I don’t know. Pretend we’re on a real date? Kind of like fantasizing, I guess, except you’re fantasizing with someone instead of just about them.”

“Sounds…enchanting,” Casey smirked, struggling for cockiness – when he really just wanted to crawl into a corner and die.

“Fuck you,” Grady laughed. “At least it’s a date, Mr. I Fly Solo. What’re you doing tonight?”

Casey stared at him. Betraying my best friend. He looked away. “You’re right. A cyber-date is better than no date.”

“Exactly,” Grady nodded. “Now, what should I wear? Go casual, white button shirt, black jeans?”

Oh god, yes. Casey swallowed thickly. “You’re going to dress up for this…date? Like, the whole nine yards? Cologne and everything?” A funny tickle teased Casey’s naval and danced down into his crotch. Fuck, Grady was irresistible in his every day wear – but when he put effort into it, spiffed himself up…good god, Casey could hardly keep his woody hidden in his presence.

“Yeah, why not?” he grinned. “It will help enhance the fantasy, don’t you think?”

Hell yes. “Uh, yeah, I suppose.” Casey was starting to sweat a little, the throb down below growing stronger.

“You okay?” Grady frowned. “You’re looking a bit pale and clammy.” He stretched over and pressed the back of his fingers to Casey’s brow. “Kind of warm, too-”

“All right,” Casey spit out as he jerked away and stood up quickly, knocking the stool over unintentionally as it clattered to the floor. Casey glanced at it anxiously before looking at Grady. “Jeez. I’m fine.”

“Easy,” Grady’s frown deepened and he straightened up. “What the hell? Where did this come from?”

 Shoving his hand through his hair, Casey released a hard breath. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “I didn’t mean to…” He raked his fingers though his hair again. “I should go. Let you get ready for your…date.

“Oh fuck,” Grady snorted. “You’re jealous, aren’t you?”

Casey stared at him, adopting as much incredulousness as possible. “Why the fuck would I be jealous?” he asked a tad too sharply. He was jealous. The “facts” of this particular reality didn’t mean shit. What mattered was reality as Grady perceived it. So, yeah, Casey was jealous. Which he consciously acknowledged was somewhat nuts.

“Oh, I don’t know.” Grady stretched slowly then curled his arms, flexing his biceps and pec muscles. The guy was fucking built. “Maybe because you, too, want a piece of-”

“Don’t even say it,” Casey scowled. “I’m not hot for your ass. And I’m not jealous.”

“Then why the sudden attitude?” Grady looked at him inquiringly.

Casey shrugged. “I’m gay. I’m allowed to be moody.”

Grady groaned and shook his head. “By the way, my date isn’t until tonight. So quit being moody and hang out for a while.”

“Fine,” Casey moaned.

“Ahh, that’s my boy,” Grady grinned and embraced Casey from behind, hugging him tight. His body sucked up against Casey’s and rocked a little as he nuzzled Casey’s ear. “Hmm…you feel kind of good,” he teased, rubbing his crotch against Casey’s ass. He clutched Casey’s chest. “Now, if there was just more to grab hold of right here, I might go for it.”

Reach lower – there’s more to grab hold of down there. Casey laughed and struggled free, stumbling away. He knew if he didn’t get away from his friend’s touch, he would start “touching” back. His cock was rock hard – a result of Grady’s crotch massaging his ass. “Get off me, freak.”

Grady chuckled. “You know you want it.”

“You think everyone wants in your pants.” Maybe not everyone, but God knows I do. Casey tried to keep the tremor out of his hands as he dug out his car keys. “I, uh…” he cleared his throat. “I need to grab some stuff at the store. I’ll be back. You need anything?”

Grady smiled. “I’m good.” He stopped Casey at the door. “Oh, maybe you should pick up an ice pack.”

“What?” Casey frowned.

Grady smirked and eyed Casey’s crotch. “For the swelling.”

Shit.

 


© Copyright 2017 AMS1971. All rights reserved.

Chapters

Add Your Comments:

Other Content by AMS1971

More Great Reading

Popular Tags