Silhouettes of A

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Adult Romance  |  House: Booksiesilk Classic Group

The story of A, a story of lust and passion and wild dreams. And the impossibility of it all.
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Recent Comments

Aurora M. Soleado

Wed, January 18th, 2023 12:42am

Aurora M. Soleado

I know I miss her already!

Wed, January 18th, 2023 12:43am

Author
Reply

Haha... :)
Btw, Aurora, she wanted me to let you know she'd hug you tight! :)

Wed, January 18th, 2023 2:39am

harriet-jacqui x

Delicious writing, I love it!

Wed, January 18th, 2023 2:02am

Author
Reply

Thank you, harriet-jacqui x. I'm blushing... inside... :) I'm glad you like it. I appreciate your feedback.

Wed, January 18th, 2023 2:37am

DampKitten

That's beautifully done and hugely romantic. For an interesting twist, wouldn't it be fun to find your girlfriend intimately close to a stranger by the gate as you exit the plane? Now, what would you immediately think?

I like how you develop this piece, and I'm particularly impressed with the detail of observations in the airport. It's clear you're a seasoned traveler and people watcher.

I was confident you and A would end up together in one of the plane's cramped lavatories doing the nasty. All the same, it was a very sexy account. Odd, though, how two couples should both travel apart on the plane like that without organizing their seats together. Serendipitous, perhaps.

Of course, this is a book with chapters to come..
and you've got her number.

Wed, January 18th, 2023 4:17am

Author
Reply

Thank you so much for your feedback, DampKitten. I'm glad you like it.

That would be an interesting twist, indeed. Never thought of it.

I was thinking about the lavatory as well, but I wanted to prolong that "agony". Having to wait for that intimate moment we all cherish makes everything that much more interesting, and I wanted to play with those feelings a little bit more before "making it happen".

The thing with choosing your seats is maybe a bit too much, but it can happen. What were the chances that both couples did the same mistake of not booking their seats together? Slim, I know, but... I'll try to be more realistic about these kinds of details from now on.

It's my first try at a "book", and believe it or not, I didn't even think it would be an erotic romance. I'm more of a sci-fi / horror / pshychological type of reader. :) But I had these fantasies in my head and I was thinking... what if?

This is what came out from asking myself that question. :)

And now I've got plenty of ideas in my head, and several other chapters to come for sure. And yeah, I've got her number... what a lucky man. :)))

Wed, January 18th, 2023 2:35am

DampKitten

I don't think it's that unrealistic that the seats are apart if you happen to travel Southwest Airlines. You know, that's a cattle call over there... at least last time I flew them. You don't book seats. You grab them.

I fully understand the 'literary foreplay' here. Very nice technique, though neither person is particularly shy about physical contact. I also find it interesting that neither character seems to experience any guilt, remorse, or hesitation based on being involved with another - particularly curious since 'A' is actually engaged. In real life, usually you have one who is the seducer and the other as being seduced. I'd say that 'A' is a bit more assertive.

Really good start for your first book. The thing about writing is going back later and making alterations. It's like creating a dress in that regard. Every writer does it - every good writer. You go back and add the frills, tighten the fitting.
This is a long flight, btw - your speaker should buy his lady a drink to loosen her up.

There are the ever present snack interruptions and bathroom breaks where both parties might catch a glimpse of their formal companions elsewhere seated. It's the opportunity for a guilty pang or sudden realization that their mate might potentially get up and walk by their own seat where these two lovebirds are sitting.

I mention specific events with which you might embellish your piece so that you can draw your reader closer. Create tension and suspense in your chapter. Add a little more dialogue. It helps with character development.

You have an eye for detail which is well demonstrated in the first several paragraphs but as the piece progresses, it dissipates slightly. The sexual contact is actually superficial relative to your established ability. We are repeatedly doing the same things, occasionally dodging the stewardess not to get caught. This could be much more intense and imaginative. Foreplay doesn't have to boring. It can be electrifying. (Not that this is boring) - but you're trying to hold back when don't actually need to do that.

Thu, January 19th, 2023 1:47am

Author
Reply

Wow, thank you. That's a lot of food for thought. I'm taking notes already. :)

Tue, January 24th, 2023 10:58am

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