facesitting for beginners

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: General Erotica  |  House: Booksiesilk Classic Group

hopefully helpful hints for male beginners

I was inspired to write this after I read a piece on a site by an incredibly talented woman who described how to give a man oral sex. I could never organize my thoughts and express them as cleverly as she did, but I felt compelled to try.

This is meant to serve as suggestions for any man who is interested in face sitting, i.e., having your female partner sit on your face, obviously for the purpose of pleasuring her. Having taken hints myself from two lesbian friends, I hope I convey the points that are most effective.

To sit or not to sit?

If you ask her to sit on your face, or if you ask her if she would like to sit on your face, and she agrees, remember that, even if you want it for your own pleasure, HER pleasure is your goal. While you might intend to lick her just to get her wet enough, or aroused enough to engage in intercourse, you should be aware of how far she wants you to take her, arousal, or orgasm? Be prepared for either and be patient and attentive.

Position: this way or that way?

Most of the time, you and she will prefer her to sit “cowgirl”, so she can look down at your face. Eye contact is sometimes arousing for her and watching her face as you perform might tell you if you’re doing things to her satisfaction. She might also enjoy watching your tongue in action.

This position also allows her the freedom to control your performance and the intensity of your licking. She can easily rise up to tease you, (the floating butterfly), or to control the pressure of your tongue if she so chooses. Most often she will kneel, straddling your chest or neck and then simply slide her vagina up onto your face until she is comfortable. She can change the angle of her legs to put more weight and pressure on your face or tongue.

 She might wish to lay her legs out straight as she sits; a position that puts much more weight on your face. This position also allows her to close her legs, perhaps to tease you by smothering you with her flesh. She might choose to squat over your face rather than actually sit on it. This puts more physical strain on her legs, but it allows her the same options in giving you access to her vagina.

Another option she has is to sit “reverse cowgirl”, facing your feet (and your penis). This position allows her basically the same freedom of movement and control as “cowgirl”, but it also allows her to change the angle at which she places her vagina on your face. She can easily use more weight on your face or tongue if she wishes to do so. She can rock back and forth on your mouth in either position but in “reverse cowgirl” she can see if your licking her affects your penis. She might consider it a compliment if licking her gives you an erection.

In a rare occasion, she might choose to sit with her legs straight over your torso, which, during “reverse cowgirl” will put the majority of her body weight directly on your face. She might choose to do this if she wants to smother you, or, in some cases, to force your face into her anus. If she chooses to squat over your face in “reverse cowgirl”, your primary access will most likely be to her anus.

Can I Touch it?  

One thing to keep in mind when she sits “reverse cowgirl” is that she has the option, but not the obligation, to touch your penis. She might want to stroke your erection while you perform, or she might want to tell you to do it. It might arouse her to watch you masturbate, and she might even want you to ejaculate when, but not before, she has her orgasm. She might even choose to tease or suck your erection but not to completion.

If for some reason she chooses to advance to a sixty-nine, remember to focus on giving her at least one orgasm before you allow your own release. (If you have communicated earlier and agreed that you will conclude with a sixty-nine from the “reverse cowgirl” position, your usual agreement on orgasms would prevail.)

 Where are her Tits?

Unless she wants you to leave your hands idle* by your sides, use your hands to play with her breasts and nipples. If she doesn’t like or want it, she will probably brush your hands away. If your hands are busy with her breasts, remember to stay focused on your primary goal.

(*Some women enjoy face sitting as a form of control over the man. Your partner might want to restrain you or otherwise require you to lie still so she can use your face, mouth, and tongue as she wishes to satisfy herself.)


You will develop your own technique in satisfying a woman while she sits on your face, but here are some suggestions:

  1. Begin with kissing or licking the insides of her thighs and work your way to the junction where her thigh meets her groin.
  2. Lick her labia, slowly. Let her anticipate.
  3. Slowly insert your tongue inside her; depth at this point is immaterial; she will let you know as you continue how often and how far to probe.
  4. “Lap” at her slit, dipping your tongue inside her.
  5. If she is not aroused enough for her clitoris to be exposed, use your fingers to open her to expose her clitoral hood. Use your tongue, licking lightly until her clitoris is exposed. (She might enjoy it if you intermittently probe her with your tongue when you lick her clitoris.)
  6. If you don’t pay attention to or lick her clitoris as quickly as she wants, she might open herself to expose her clitoris. Take this as your cue to pay more attention to it.
  7. Pace is important; don’t rush it, let her enjoy the sensations you provide with your tongue.
  8. Continue to alternate between probing her with your tongue and licking her clitoris.
  9. When there is an indication that her pleasure is increasing, perhaps evidenced by her moaning, or putting pressure on your face, you might consider softly humming on her clitoris. Some women find this exhilarating if it is done at the height of her pleasure. Doing so might or might not induce her orgasm; follow your instincts based on her reaction and body movements.
  10.  She might tell you verbally sometime during the process if she wants you to change what you are doing. Obey her instructions and take mental note of what she liked for future reference.
  11. She might ask or tell you to use one finger or more to probe her vagina while you lick her. This may be awkward to perform, depending on the position, but do what you can to comply.
  12. She might tell or ask you to use one finger or more to probe her anus, which, in either position, is more accessible.
  13.  If she doesn’t tell you verbally, her breathing and body movements should indicate when she is reaching her peak.
  14. When you are certain that she is having an orgasm, continue what you are doing until she either tells you to stop, or until she removes her vagina from your mouth.


After her orgasm, she might remain seated on your face until she is ready to proceed. She might even consider having you resume for an additional orgasm or more. This would be an indication that you’ve done well, so comply and enjoy!

Allow her time to relax and enjoy the pleasure of her orgasm(s). (Personally, as she recovers, I like to gently reinsert my tongue into her vagina; there’s nothing as exciting, at least to me, as tasting an aroused woman’s vagina.) If you elect to try the latter and she objects, she will quickly indicate it.

At some point, you might want to kiss your partner after she gets off your face. If she likes to taste herself on your lips it might arouse her even more. If she doesn’t, a quick visit to the bathroom to wash your face and rinse your mouth would be in order.

Respect and gratitude

Since you asked her to sit on your face, (for whatever reason), it would be prudent to ask if your performance was satisfactory.

Thank her sincerely for doing it for you and tell her how much you enjoyed it. If you did an exceptional job, she might surprise you by doing it unexpectedly in the future.


I sincerely hope that my suggestions and observations, based on previous experience and advice, will be helpful to you and your female partner.

Ladies, even (and especially) lesbians, I would welcome your comments, favorable or not to help me in my own endeavor to provide my female partners a satisfying face sitting experience.





Submitted: December 26, 2022

© Copyright 2023 willnorman. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:



Somehow, Will, I can see you in the aisle at the front of an airplane reciting this dialogue as you face the seated occupants demonstrating how to tighten their safety belts and manually inflate their lifejackets in the unlikely event they should land in the Potomac.

Seriously, this is far more meticulously thought out than I've ever attempted to consider, and it may make me pause indefinitely before I ever attempt this again from either side of the equation...
Thus, I might need to consider therapy.

I will say that all your reasoning behind the advantages of cowgirl over reverse cowgirl is true with the absence of one final point - the position just feels better. I think it's the angle of the tongue on the clit, and pretty much everything else.

I knew a guy on this site who told me he lived to perform oral on women. He could actually ejaculate from the excitement of having a girl ride his face. I would have loved to see that. Hence, I would have picked reverse cowgirl under that special circumstance. What's the point of him spraying my back?

You really have outdone yourself with this piece, Will, and I hope to see it printed up boldly in one of those banana yellow pamphlets in the self-help section of Barnes and Nobles under the title, "Eating Pussy for Dummies". Be sure to include illustrations. It made Kama and Sutra who they are today.

Tue, December 27th, 2022 1:36am


I wasn't fishing for that much of a compliment, but thank you. I did put some thought to it and I had hoped that it would indeed help any guy who hasn't had the nerve or opportunity to try face sitting.

Thanks again for your response; it meant a lot to me.

Mon, December 26th, 2022 6:01pm


Have you ever considered a teaching position as a professor!? I am sure you’ll excel at it… your techniques were immaculately through and descriptive. I really learned a lot on this subject.

Wed, December 28th, 2022 5:21am


Thank you, but we both know that practice makes perfect, right?

Wed, December 28th, 2022 8:21am


Wow Will,
Is there a sign up sheet a gal can put her name down on to get that in home demonstration ? Sounds like tons of fun to be had there : ))

Wed, December 28th, 2022 11:58am


That might be a good idea for another story, hmmmmm.....door to door oral.

Wed, December 28th, 2022 8:22am


Having been one of those who've never been given the opportunity to perform this service in this fashion, I truly thank you for the guided tour! Now, do you have instructions on how to motivate my woman to allow your teachings to be my guide?

Wed, December 28th, 2022 5:59pm


Tell her you found it interesting and let her read it? lol Thanks for the comments.

Wed, December 28th, 2022 1:05pm

Amy F. Turner

Wonderful tutorial for the individual aiming to please a lady. I would say that every woman is different and the one enduring the facesitting should take the cues given for maximum effect. Cowgirl and reverse cowgirl have their benefits to be sure but are pleasurable either way. As in any activity, it should be enjoyed by the person delivering as well as accepting the pleasure. Must be mindful of whiskers though. Clean-shaven guys are the best, but prickly beards tickle. Might want to ask if she's ticklish if you're growing facial hair. ;)

Mon, January 9th, 2023 8:37pm


OMG that is one thing I didn't think about, shaving. Drat! Although it may not matter to some ladies, it would be prudent to ask or know ahead of time, for sure. Personally I have always made sure that I shaved close for her maximum comfort. (Although for a while I did sport a mustache and it posed no problem nor hindrance.)
Thank you for reading, Ms. Amy. I miss seeing your sexy stories and respectful comments. Hopefully you will have more time to entertain us soon?
Happy New Year, by the way.

Mon, January 9th, 2023 1:36pm

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