All Your Sex Belongs to Us

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Literary Erotica  |  House: Booksiesilk Classic Group

An alienated man becomes with obsessed with the mysteries of revenge porn on the net, while also rediscovering the hardcore of his youth.

The clip is about 30 seconds long and called ‘Blackmail Blow Job’, its thumbnail a blurred screenshot of a cock in a mouth.  Robert2046 had come across it looking for vintage Color Climax loops on Xhamster. He liked videos with revenge porn connotations; there was always an air of existential mystery about them. Rewatching the clip he was struck by how much you can pack into half a minute. At the start of the video there is a brief glimpse of an upright silver refrigerator with a party banner peeling off the wall to the side of it.

The video switches to an attractive middle aged woman, in a black dress with long dark hair touching her shoulders, on her knees sucking a big dick with some gusto. She is pumping it so frenetically it seems almost parodic. After the quick and wobbly side long shot of the woman the POV switches to the top of her manically dipping head. She looks up and says ‘I love you’ in an American accent, then showily licks his cock, her blue eyes staring into the camera, her face partially obscured by the dong. She starts mechanically working the cock again and the owner of it pushes her hair back. Now the camera is deadly still, clearly capturing the woman’s face. It seems a strangely deliberate act, like a hunter taking a photo of his fallen prey for a memento. Anyone who knew the woman would recognise her. Then he goes back to an overhead shot as he puts his free hand on the back of her head.  Fucking her mouth roughly, there are a few thrusts that make the woman who declared she loved him gag before the clip ends.

It had generated meagre interest with 1.5k views and no comments, so there was nothing there to illuminate the back story or provide any clues. Robert2046 speculated if any of the videos on here had mortal consequences; was ‘Blackmail Blow Job’ a random clip of someone getting lucky at a party with a clickbait title or a genuinely premeditated act of vindictiveness. Had the filmer used this as leverage for money or influence or was it simply a fuck you to a cuckold? Was it posted out of resentment after the woman had cooled things or had he deliberately seduced her? You can see she did it out of love to please him, giving it the full porn star experience. Then the need for connection, she tells him she loves him. Maybe her husband had seen it and blown his head off or it could have ended in the more likely and mundane domestic apocalypse of divorce. And here it was, to be leered at and wanked over for the lulz.

There’s a minute and half long clip called ‘Blonde Married Slut Hotel Deep Throat’, on Xhamster as always, which looks promising, giving off the authentic whiff of cuckold revenge porn, the thumbnail showing a prick gorged on by a glamorous peroxide milf who looks early thirties. It’s all meat here. All women are milfs, gilfs, teens, sluts, bitches, et al. Robert 2046 clicks on it to investigate. He wonders what the story is behind this. It launches straight into the action, with the blonde, just her head and right hand in shot, vigorously working a hard cock. The clip is a minute and a half long and takes place in what appears to be a cheap and cheerful budget hotel bedroom.  A kettle stands on a dressing table behind the woman’s cropped bobbing head while her lover lies on the bed capturing proceedings on his phone.

It’s a big cock, but it nearly always is in reality porn, the owners of them seem awfully keen to commemorate their appendages by keeping a visual record no matter the consequence. The blonde is eager to please, sucking his balls hard and deep throating the cock. She looks directly at the camera and says in an Essex intonation, “I love you, you know.” She keeps eye contact as the cock disappears into her mouth. The lover remains silent and the clip ends soon after.

Robert2046 detects symmetry with ‘Blackmail Blow Job’. At first he thought she might be a sex worker because of her proficiency and attractiveness, with an injection of mock enthusiasm to reward an especially generous punter, maybe an itinerant businessman treating himself to a high grade sex worker. The ‘I love you, you know’ dispelled the notion; it seems a genuine attempt to reaffirm an emotional connection. Like the other clip, was this a woman nearing middle age pleasuring a young and narcissistic lover, who released the clip motivated by vindictiveness or ego? It had 5k views and 4 comments. There are no clues in the comment section. She’s gorgeous! I’d go to heaven her sucking my cock. Ain’t she had any breakfast. I’d love to suck that cock. The last comment struck Robert2046 as something of an outlier.

In his suggested videos feed there’s a clip called ‘Dirty Workmates’ with the same thumbnail picture as ‘Blonde Married Slut Hotel Deep Throat’  and runs a minute longer. It’s the same clip but where the original ends on the cock swallowing this video cuts to a close up of his cock working in and out of her pussy.  Then she’s lain naked underneath him, breathily repeating, ‘Fuck me, fuck me….’

The POV veers between her large breasts and his cock in her cunt, her moans distorted by the bad audio to possess an eerie quality, then there’s a flash of her face contorted in anger, ‘Stop filming and fuck me proper!’ Her hand swats the camera and the clip finishes with a few seconds of darkness. There’s a lot more action on this one, 78k views and 49 comments and maybe a tale to tell.

A cursory look at the comments section denuded the clip of its ambiguity. Someone gives a detailed explanation, including the names and the ages of the participants, and with so much relish Robert2046 suspected the poster had a personal interest vested in it. Or maybe they were just another net ghoul picking at a carcass. It was a couple of co-workers, married to other people, employed by an oil company in Scotland fucking in a coastal bed and breakfast. She was a 34 year old sales manager who came from London, no kids, and he was 25, an engineer from Edinburgh, also childless. The wife of the guy found the clip on his phone and decided to post it on a WhatsApp group and it became something of a viral cause celebre. Robert2046 googled the names and was surprised by the volume of juicy links that popped up. It had been covered in some detail in the British tabloids. There was even a picture of the man wearing a kilt at his wedding, his bride pixelated, roughly a year before the video was shot in the hotel. His wife had instigated divorce proceedings. The femme fatale was captured scowling on the driveway of what was described as a 4 bedroom detached house worth £850,000. It was a one off, she was quoted as saying. Her husband had forgiven her and they were reconciled.

Robert2046 returned to the comments section. Why did the daft cunt have it on his phone? I’d have the slut back way she sucks.  He did her bareback too her old man must be a mug.  And so the comments went on, all variations on these themes. The husband is a beta cuck. I’d have her back with them juicy big tits. No mystery here then, just one of the oldest tales of all. The clip would endure though, for as long as there existed eyes that wanted to gaze upon it. No doubt it would haunt the participants, who he suspected would be tentative on their excursions into social media, and their relatives for a generation or so at least.

The internet is often melodramatically framed as any number or permutation of things; barbarous theatre of the absurd, festival of sousveillance,  moronic echo chamber with lethal significances, virtual monument  of vapid and dehumanising consumerism,  rat trap of puerile social networking, stage for paranoid and narcissistic exhibitionism,  inexhaustible source of cruel spectacle. Take your pick or mix and match to your preferred conclusion.  And the hate, the hate was continuously pulsing through it, either overtly or effervescing under the surface. One thing you could say about the hatred though was it was the one truly sincere emotion expressed on the net amongst all the counterfeit emotive performances. Hatred always possessed a certain purity. Robert 2046 felt what was often overlooked though was that the net, when considered as a monolithic and cavernous whole, was essentially a haunted house.  So many gone who had once frequented it, washed away like footprints on a beach consumed by high tide, all the web pages that would never be viewed again, the cobwebbed nostalgia,  the weepy tributes to  the dying and extinct, the loss, the emptiness. And there he was, haunting its darkest corners.


Robert2046 spent the weekend going on vintage erotica forums, all comfortably numb thanks to a legally prescribed opioid daze. It is from nostalgia he went to those sites, remembering the Scandinavian pornography of his teenage years, Blue Climax and Rodox magazines, Color Climax videos. In his youth  Robert2046 regarded the grungy and bizarre Color Climax loops as a bit of a lark with amusing English dubbing, bizarre fashions and haircuts along with entertainingly incongruous library music, which, despite the odd bit of urolagnia and hermaphroditism, were surprisingly vanilla. It was only in middle age when he went on the Adult Loop Database did he realise full depravity of their output, a cultural endgame of CP and bestiality.

At the forums the emphasis on 70s and 80s porn meant many of the visitors were 40 upwards and predominantly male though there was a few in their 20s and 30s most of them introduced to the delights of retro hardcore by discovering the porn  stashes of relatives who had expired.  Robert2046 gleaned the age range as many of the posters seemed keen to declare how long their transient stay on the planet had lasted so far.   I’m 66 and I’m still wanking over Louise London all these years later, declared HornyOldMick.  Pubis1995 offered ,  I’m a nipper here mid20s, got into all this old stuff after finding my dad’s old Whitehouse and Playbirds  mags in his garden shed after he died last year. Proper women with hairy cunts and real knockers not like the shaved pussies and fake tit rubbish of today. God bless you dad, miss you loads, hope you are looking down on me. Robert2046 presumed the last heartfelt declaration didn’t extend to dear old dad on his heavenly peak watching his son masturbating over a Mary Millington centrefold.

The forum threads were devoted to praising or identifying female models, both softcore and hardcore, scans of old porno mags and tributes to fallen comrades by the moderators. Thanks Gnasher1959 for all the Teenage Bestsellers scans, died after a long battle with cancer aged 61. Farewell to RandyRob who kindly shared his rare copies of Sex Orgies In Color with us and departed suddenly after suffering a heart attack on holiday in Thailand. He died happy from what I heard. The comment was bookended by a salaciously winking emoji. Robert2046 thought of the models themselves who were still venerated here, all dead or old now, ash, bone, elderly; did they know all this was out there, that they constituted a subgenre? Unlike all other branches of the entertainment industry the female adult performers’ determinedly evaded rediscovery, so many had disappeared without trace, reinvented themselves and cherished their newfound facelessness. Their male counterparts, now aged and flagging, were unsurprisingly only too happy to discuss their former sexual prowess.  In twenty years or so, once Robert 2046 and his contemporaries had died or succumbed to dementia, they would all finally be forgotten. Maybe some younger stalwarts would maintain the flame with an online presence, the sons of the fathers, and maintain the memory of the long gone porn starlets as minor footnotes in the history of erotic visual representations. Perusing the sites had an enervating effect on Robert2046; he shuddered as the revenants around the edges of his life began to gather. A feeling of closeness to death, of everyone going, never really left him now; Robert 2046 felt its chilly breath on his neck with disquieting regularity. He was now lost to the past, no longer possessing the energy to attempt an illusory escape from his trap.

The 4 minute clip had 127 views and no comments. Whoever posted it offered little by way of explanation other than the enigmatic title ‘UK Hotel Shaggers’ and a handful of tags; swingers, preggo sex, British amateurs. The video looks like it was taken from a DVD conversion of a VHS tape, the picture keeps breaking up into wavy lines and the colour washed out almost to the point of transparency. It’s all captured through a carefully positioned static camera angle and is time stamped 05.04.1994. The proceedings start wobbly but discernible but it becomes more abstract as the picture quality further degrades.  Two MF couples, fucking side by side on a bed doggy style; both of the women look heavily pregnant. The women’s heads are buried in the mattress, their forearms obscuring their faces. Not that you could make much out anyway, at parts the knot of flesh resembling a splashy pink blob. The men’s heads are chopped off by the angle of the camera lens, with the careful composition of the sexual choreography suggesting a desire for privacy rather than technical incompetence.  It was the only upload by YorkieLUFC and they offered no personal profile details apart from an avatar that was the badge of Leeds United. Now here was a real enigma thought Robert 2046. Maybe the poster was one of the kids of the expectant mothers in the video who had found a dusty old VHS tape in a forgotten attic of his parents fucking, seeing themselves in an obscure cameo  hidden by a distended stomach,  and decided to upload it just for jolly.  Imagine that.  He nearly left a comment but did not want to spoil the pristine anonymity of the post or, being a perennial lurker, attract attention to himself. Robert2046 bookmarked the page the video was on and when he returned to it a month or so later it had been deleted. The magnetic ghosts had gone.


Submitted: January 31, 2022

© Copyright 2023 The Old Punt. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:



This is good. Very literary in an erotically charged way. Never thought about those kinds of vids. May have to take a look.

Tue, February 1st, 2022 8:30pm


Thanks appreciate the kind comments If you are a porn connoisseur you'd enjoy it. I post a lot of my faves on IG if you want any links just let me know.

Sat, February 5th, 2022 12:18pm

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