Reads: 87  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 1

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Reddit
  • Pinterest
  • Invite

Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Adult Romance  |  House: Booksiesilk Classic Group

Chapter 2 and Jills career begins to take off and she discovers that there is a price to pay for success.



PAGE 6-7


Jill Sinclair smiled that slightly bashful smile that had served her so well for so long. 


These pictures really did do justice to her natural good looks.  That smile and that demure look was clear to see in the first one.

“Jilly dear” her Mother sang to her as she almost floated into her bedroom.  “I've just had  a telephone call from ‘EuroFashion' magazine, they want to see you to try out for a big photo shoot.


She looked so silly to me.  A grown woman actually bouncing up and down, round and round with joy.


“This is big!  They are going to pay expenses and a big fee, if you come through the screentests, or whatever they call them.  I’ll tell the school that you are poorly, we get the train to London tomorrow.”


Of course I was excited, London was a mysterious place.


Pictures flashed through my mind of me dressed like Betty Boo singing ‘Doing the do’ Chatting to Bananarama and Sonya as we strutted our stuff for the cameras.  I’d be famous, rich and beautiful.


I practiced my ‘Look’.  I think I was getting the hang of it.  Mum had sent me to Drama classes in Newcastle and they worked on my ‘look’ and my acting skills.  “Just be your own sweet self” my teacher Margo would say “And don't forget to use that look that everyone mentions,

- So sultry Dahling”


Jill sighed deeply and turned her tape over, then shuffled from the bed and walked to her multi-purpose sink, kitchen, wash-basin,  and urinal in the alcove.  I should call it my SKWAU, she thought briefly, picturing a red Indian Pocahontas type, filling her kettle and rinsing out a cup.


She considered making coffee, then decided tea was cheaper and took an Aldi tea bag from the box on the mantelpiece. She opened a couple of the little UHT milk cartons she’d borrowed from Morrisons cafe on one of her trips around the try-a-bit counters.  That was always a cheap tea if she was skint.


She scalded the tea and fished out the tea bag tentatively with her fingers.  As she threw it in the bin a virtual speech bubble appeared in her head.  “Tea Bagging” was all it said but she laughed out loud, not a shy laugh but ironic.


She took the mug of tea back to her bed, placed it on the bedside drawers and replaced the album on her lap.  She quickly thumbed her phone to see if she had any messages.  Avoiding Instagram and Snapchat in case there was a message there.  Tonight was just for her.


The trip to London had been difficult for her because she was so excited.  Up at five bathed and preened and doused in the latest perfume, Fendi probably.  Mum had dressed her in what Mum thought was trendy.  Tight stretchy jeans, Baggy jumper that was too warm for the weather and a baseball cap that she insisted I wear backwards. 


Luckily she had been told that I should not put on ANY makeup, they have makeup artists ‘in studio’  I was a bit excited because we had been told we could keep the clothes I modelled if I wished.


Three hours on a train, half an hour in a smelly black cab, and into the studio above a Public house.  It was a proper studio with changing rooms and makeup chairs.  A hairdresser, all very exciting.


I tried on half a dozen outfits and three of them were selected for photographing.  I was asked to pose, walk, sit even lie with my head in my hands on my elbows.  The photographer Terry was very patient and kept saying “YESSS that's the look” 

When we’d finished he told me what a good girl I’d been and offered to take “a few for your portfolio”  Mum was excited because portfolio pictures could cost hundreds, this was a favour for my great work.


I went towards the dressing room, but he said, just change here and handed mum a couple of outfits which were not very big.  The spotty dress first he said, clicking the camera as I changed.  “Just for the light” he said as I turned my back on him.

A week later as promised He sent Mum a copy of four or five pictures of me looking a bit too grown up.  Thankfully I never saw any of the ‘just for light’ pictures again.

I can honestly say that at that point in time I was ecstatic.  Designer costumes, Mam got £500 and copies of the magazine photos and though I didn't get to meet Sonya or Bananarama this time.  I did feel famous.  The article was ironically labelled ‘THE LOOK’

Jill drank some more tea and answered a text from Lauren, her best friend at the moment.  She looked at the spotted dress portfolio photograph again and shook her head.  She’d learned a different ‘look’.

Then she turned the pag


PAGE 8-9




Miss Jillian Sinclair put down the empty cup and picked up the packet of cigarettes on the bedside drawers.  The twenty packet from a tax free sleeve.  She studied the writing - STERLING -  Cheap  enough, and not too bad.  She shook the box, before looking inside and noting she had thirteen left in the box.  “Unlucky - better smoke one” the devil on her shoulder told her.  She had hugged and kissed Adnan in the shop for letting her ‘lay them on’.


Ok so his hands wandered excitedly during the hug, and touched one or two places ‘accidently’ in the process. But he was happy to be ‘visibly’ turned on and she was relieved to get her fix.  She knew how to get free fags!  “SHIT” Jill shouted, as she got up from her comfortable position on the bed to retrieve her borrowed lighter from the hearth.


She replaced the open album on her knee as she lit the cigarette.  She hated smoking and smokers back then she recalled.  Enjoying her drama lessons with Margot she was waiting to start Senior school.  She sat in her Disney ‘Jessie the cowgirl’ pyjamas eating breakfast.  Mum came in with a handful of letters from the front door. She sorted them by appearance and gave a running commentary on her progress. 


“Womans Own want us to do a knitting pattern Dahling.”) She’d picked up the ‘Dahling’ affectation from photo shoots.

“Oh Smash hits want a session too”

“HA! Jackie want another photo “story shoot”

 “Here it is Sweety, you’ve got a place at the High School in Newcastle, better hope we keep getting the work to pay for it!”  We did!


Jill recalls at the tender age of nearly fifteen,  the fateful phone call from Margo.

“Great news Miss Jilly, we might have something for you, put Mummy on!”

Margo had put me forward as a candidate for a new Teen Drama by a local ITV franchise. 

“We need to go to Newcastle TV studios” you’ve got a screen test, Mum excitedly told me!


Jill flicked the ash into her empty lager can, and gazed adoringly at the picture of her from the TV hit ‘The Youth Club’.  She was the cool kid everyone turned to for advice or comfort.  The Look clear to see on the slightly upturned corners of her mouth and sympathetic eyes.


Kayla Ross was born. Stevie the female producer described her character as “The girl all the girls want to be and all the boys want to be with”


I was given some lines and scenarios to perform in front of the Cameras.  It came so easy to me, I  was Kayla.  Margos advice came back to me 


“Just be your own sweet self and don't forget to use that look that everyone mentions, - So sultry Dahling”


Jill remembered the instructions and the costume fittings vividly.  Her first encounter with a woman who felt the need to watch her change into a different costumes, just to make sure they fit ok.  She would regularly check for fit and ‘camel toe’, straighten my posture with one hand cupping a buttock while the other pushed too gently on my breasts.  Must be OK she's a woman I thought.

I was beginning to think that this was simply the way people behaved in the Media.  Even my  the middle aged co-star Giles would regularly ‘handle me’ 


“Bet you 50p I can make your tits move by just looking at them.  Then he would grab them and wiggle them, before laughing and saying “OK you win”, handing over 50p.  He tried it on with every new girl who started the show, laughing at his hilarious joking.


Jill lit another cigarette, and contemplated with a cute smile the prospect of poor Adnan standing proud, grinning as he handed over more cigarettes.


Four years she played the wonderful Kayla Ross, she appeared in various Newspapers and Magazines.  The top Photo on the opposite page taken as part of a shoot for ‘GT’ lads mag.  The TV producers refused to let them print it.  “It sexualises you Jill Dahling” the hypocritical Stevie announced as she squeezed my thigh a little too high up!


The smile reappeared as she thought of the ‘GT’ shoot.  The photographer, Aiden, was unashamedly flirting.  He let me wait behind so he could get a picture of me with Geri, who hugged and kissed us when she arrived.  Not Sonya but so much better. 

I  had made it, and I feel no guilt saying that I enjoyed every moment of Aiden’s physical and unashamedly exaggerated repositioning of my poses. 


She inhaled the smoke from her cigarette deeply and turned the page.


 Pages 10-11

While Jill Sinclair looked lovingly at the photographs in her beloved album, her phone chimed again

While Jill Sinclair looked lovingly at the photographs in her beloved album, her phone chimed again.

She checked the sender of the text, it was Lauren again. - it read:

*I've got some good shit if you fancy a smoke LoL*

Lauren had a flat, and a job and a life.  Why was she wasting her money on skunk for entertainment?  Thought Jill

*Are you on your own*Jill typed back.. Too often she was invited by so called friends who had promised one of their mates they could meet 'Kayla Ross', sometimes they even offered them the chance of a shag.  Sometimes they got it!  Trouble is she wasn't Kayla Ross, she was fourty not sixteen, and didn't have the answers to everyone's problems.  What's more she had no money or fame to offer.  She was no longer a trophy girlfriend.

*It'll just be me and you and a cat named boo*  came the reply, * Ok - bout half an hour * said Jill.

It was nine o'clock and it was fifteen minutes walk to the town centre flat where Lauren lived.  No point getting all fancy, Just jeans and a sloppy jumper, and wash her face in the SWUAK.

"Not too bad" she said out loud, looking at her reflection in a shop window as she walked to Laurens flat. 

Jill believed that walking helped you think straight, but as she walked she recalled the life of a sixteen year old TV actress in the mid 90s.  She was wined and dined, she got into all the best nightclubs free.  Good looking men asked her out all the time. Most of them were several years older than her, and none of them were her age.

At the time she felt mature, worldly and important.  The permissive society was made for her.  Her mother and father who should have given her a moral code had lost their own.   Sitting in their nice house, doing lines of speed and smoking cannabis.  Then going out and drinking till the early hours.

Jill can't remember a time when she was asked where she had been if she stayed out all night.  To say her body was a temple meant many people worshipped it and sought comfort within.

She eventually found a 'steady boyfriend' in the form of Music Agent, Tony Hutchinson who added her to his entourage.

By her nineteenth birthday, 'The Youth Club' was not being renewed and Jill was out of a job.  Margo had long since given up on her, and her parents appeared to have lost too many brain cells to help her.  Enter the wonderful Tony.  Mr ten percent (Or was it 20%).  Within weeks he had arranged an audition with the producer of popular soap opera, about country folk in a small  Yorkshire  village.The audition at Yorkshire TV  in Leeds went well until they were finalising contract details.

"Well that just leaves a couple of matters that we'll sort out over a meal,"  said the middle aged ptoducer."I've booked us a room at the hotel so you don't have to worry about getting home."Jill had looked pleadingly at Tony, but he just said "Thats the way it is in showbiz Jill.  Give a little, get a lot. See you tomorrow"  and he walked to his car and left.

She got the Job as Lisa Huggins estranged sister, Diane,and the promise of a long run if the first twelve months went well.  -   The fat producer fell asleep after getting her drunk, removing her clothes and pawing her for a while.  Then he made a grunted and puffing attempt at the sex act.  Jill put her clothes back on, left the room and paid for a single room for herself and showered for a long time before lying awake for the rest of the night feeling dirty and disgusted.  But she got the part!


Lauren answered the door, and they spent until around eleven, in pleasant conversation with each other, drinking a nice white wine and eating a box of Dairy Milk chocolates.  Lauren had to go to work, so Jill left and walked home.  They hadn't  even smoked the Joint that Lauren had made, so Jill took it as a 'night cap'

When she got back in, the room was toasty, no need to switch the fire off when the gas is free.  Nobody was about and she was pleased not to have to refuse the offers of company that she got whenever any of her neighbours saw her.

She took her clothes off and put on an old T shirt, before getting into bed.  She studied her body, and sniffed her armpits.  "I'll do"  she said to herself.  She hated the ordeal of the shared bathroom.  Everyone wanted to get a look at 'Kayla' in the shower. 

The album lay where she'd left it and she plumped her pillow against the wall and gazed at the picture of her with Jak and Marvin Huggins.  After a successful year, her character was mysteriously abducted.  "We have your number Miss Sinclair if  if we decide she should warrant a return" said the dirty old producer after I rejected his 'Offer' of an extension.

She looked at the second picture. The demure expression had gone without a trace.  Tony quickly got her another job, but sadly it appears her popularity in The country folk soap and The Youth Club were not enough. 

She knew what she had to do and surrendered her pride and her body to another TV executive,  This time it was at least a contrived attempt at magnetic attraction, that was 'acted out' over his executive desk in his plush office with her top pushed up and her jeans pulled down.

Somehow that felt less brutal but more disturbing.  She acted the part of the star struck kid and he played the part of the powerful alpha male.  Looking at it that way she reconciled it, telling herself "I've had worse lovers

She was given an open ended contract in another Northern soap opera, aware that keeping the contract open was dependent keeping the executive satisfied.  Jill  was playing  Jenna, a vicious, jealous teenager playing on Rob and Kayley's good nature.

She finished her smoke and put the Album down with a cigarette paper marking her place - until tomorrow.




Submitted: January 12, 2022

© Copyright 2022 Graham Makem. All rights reserved.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Reddit
  • Pinterest
  • Invite

Add Your Comments:


Isla McNair

I really love your writing, your layout, your startlingly original imagery, all of you!

Wed, January 12th, 2022 9:37pm


Awe thank you lovely Harriet, for those kind words. It means an awful lot to me, coming from a writer whose work I respect and admire.

Graham x

Wed, January 12th, 2022 4:38pm

Other Content by Graham Makem

Book / Adult Romance

Book / Sci-Fi and Fantasy Erotica

Short Story / Adult Romance