Reads: 95
Comments: 3

Maddie raised her head from between Kait’s thighs and spoke, ‘Why has it gone so dark?’

It wasn’t just dark inside the summerhouse. The wooden shack was pitch black, without a shaft of light. It was impossible for the girls to see each other, only feel, they could feel.

Kait relaxed her grip on her lover’s waist, ‘The door must’ve blown shut in the wind.’

‘But there isn’t any wind?’

‘Then it must’ve shut itself.’

‘I’m scared.’

Kait hugged her girl as best she could, then eased her off her, feeling her weight removed, ‘Don’t be scared, Mads. We’ll soon get out. Then we’ll put on our clothes and go home.’

‘Our wet clothes,’ Maddie corrected, getting to her feet.

‘Yes, our wet clothes,’ Kait reflected gloomily, then brightened, ‘Things could be worse.’

‘How, Kait? How could things be worse? Shut up in this horrible place, nothing to see, nothing to eat or drink, no clothes to wear. I want us to get out of this dump and go home.’

Kait clambered to her feet and searched for a tell-tale chink in the wall, feeling blindly with her hands,

‘Feel along the wall until you find the door, then push. Ouch!’

Maddie’s voice, in the dark, ‘What’s the matter?’

‘I’ve got a splinter in my finger.’

‘Oh, no Kait!’

‘Oh, no Kait! Oh, no Kait! Oh, no Kait!’

‘Stop it, Maddie!’

‘It isn’t me! It isn’t me!’

‘Oh, no Kait! Oh, no Kait! Oh, no Kait!’

‘Stop it! Stop it!’ she shouted.

The mocking voice fell quiet. There was someone outside the summerhouse, mocking Kait. The sound of hysterical laughter, cruel laughter, outside. A woman’s laugh, or the laugh of an effeminate man. They heard her laugh cruelly. Both of them heard her laugh, this time,

‘Oh, no Kait! Oh, no Kait! Oh, no Kait!’

‘Stop It! Stop It!’ she screamed. The voice fell quiet, then nothing. They were alone. Kait cried, ‘No! Come back! Come back! Let us out! Let us out!’

The two girls beat their fists on the splinter-wooden wall, making a terrible din, screaming their heads off. Cutting and bruising their fists. Kicking at the wall, furiously. Cutting and bruising their bare feet. Screaming themselves hoarse. Kait felt Maddie’s body sag against hers, felt her, giving up all hope, despairing,

‘What are we going to do? What are we going to do? We can’t stay here! Can’t stay here!’

‘Someone will find us,’ Kait assured her.

‘Who? Who will find us? You told me no-one would ever find us here. You told me that!’

The darkness, the hard drumming of rain upon the veranda, the onset of panic in her babe, tipped Kait over the crazy edge, the ridge of hysteria; it was Kait who lost her cool, lashing out at her mate, shaking her by the bare shoulders, slapping her cute little pixie face,

‘Shut up, Mads! Shut up!’

Maddie started to cry. They both did. The two girls slumped to the ground, wondering if they would ever be found.

It was left to Cleft to tie up all the loose ends. She picked Maddie’s clothes off the metal trellis, then gathered Kaitlyn’s clothing off the ground, tying them all up in a wet bundle, destined for the Clothing Bank that she passed on the way home. The hungry and the poor would appreciate the white cotton shirts and swaying polyester skirts in the heat of the desert, maybe not their bras and panties. She disposed of them, burying them under heavy logs in the swollen, muddy woodland pool, then she made her way to the main forest path, the golf club, the junction with Forest Road, the village green, and home.

THE END


Submitted: July 16, 2021

© Copyright 2021 hjfurl. All rights reserved.

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Comments

DampKitten

Fascinating stuff. I'm not sure the 'mocking' repetition from Cleft is immediately effective...I wasn't initially sure what you were doing there. It might be better to clarify the dialogue.

This is heart pounding stuff.

I must admit, I'm surprised that Cleft wasn't in the room with the girls. I didn't realize she was locking them in from the outside. Having her collect and dispose of their clothes...that is such dark foreshadowing. I like it.

Sat, July 17th, 2021 1:39am

Author
Reply

Thanks, I was all mixed up, getting carried away, here, which is why I only got away with some of it - which is more than Kait and Maddie did. Cleft, well, she'll touch Kait, no doubt, after the tale has ended, in the dark depths of our dreams.
Your a dream, to me, Kitten, with your lovely assessments.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart,
HJ x

Sat, July 17th, 2021 4:59am

DampKitten

I actually meant for you to extend this rather than eliminate chapter 12. The end for the girls is way too impersonal. Jessica isn’t gonna just lock them up and leave and you don’t leave the rest to imagination

Mon, July 19th, 2021 3:49am

Author
Reply

Isn't she? My characters can do what the hell they like, thank you very much, you've already made me change this story, take chunks off the end, delete material for future stories, you don't own Silk, you don't own me or my stories - so STOP INTERFERING!

Mon, July 19th, 2021 5:19am

DampKitten

Hey, I didn't "make" you do anything, hj. All I said was the last chapter was anti-climactic. You took it from there.
In any event, chapter 12 would work fine as a last chapter in my opinion. It's just that there seems to be a vacuum between 11 and 12 which is a little hard for the reader to swallow. Why is that? Because Cleft has voiced a specific interest in one of the girls (and a dislike for the other). When you do that, it leads the reader into expecting a face to face encounter.

Tue, July 20th, 2021 11:47am

Author
Reply

An open ending.

Tue, July 20th, 2021 4:47pm

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