Chapter Eight -
He barley registered his movements until he realized he was in front of her home again. The windows darkened, sad that she was not home. With his head bent, he began to walk away but froze when he heard her voice singing lightly, coming around the corner. He looked up to find her carrying a bag of groceries, oblivious to the world around her. He could not believe the girl who wrote the last entry seemed so carefree in front of him. He watched her, wanting desperately to approach her, to touch her, but he knew all to well now what her punishment would be. As if providence where looking after him, he watched as a careless biker whirled too close to her, causing her to stumble and loose her footing. She went down hard, her groceries spilling out around her.
"Hey!" she yelled as the man continued his speed down the sidewalk.
"Great, just freaking great!" she said as she blew her hair from her face and began collecting her things.
"Let me help you," Gideon said moving so fast she probably wondered where he had come from.
"Thanks, I got it." she said nervously her eyes traveling from his feet to meet his eyes.
"It's no problem. I don't mind" He bent over and began collecting her oranges that seemed to have rolled in all directions. Their fingers touched for just a moment as he handed her the last orange. An electric spark traveled along his skin and he knew from the sound of her increased pulse that she felt it as well. She looked at him with such intensity he was forced to look away first.
"Do I know you?" she asked.
"No, I don't think so" he lied, you don't know me, but I know you, "Gideon, Gideon Talbot" he said offering her his hand.
"Lisbeth" she responded as she took his and to stand and trying to find her footing while balancing the now torn bag in her hand. Another item falling again to the ground, "Damn the devil to hell!" she whispered in frustration.
"I got it" he smiled, "let me help you, please." He asked as he removed the bag from her arms, "do you live far from here?"
"No, no I am just here. I think I can manage." She said not wanting to meet his eyes.
"You're bleeding," Gideon said softly.
"What? Oh, well… that happens" she said as she looked down at her skinned knee. Gideon bent down, pulling a kerchief from his pocket, wiping the blood away gently. He saw the small scar on the knee that he had read in her journal, he wanted so much to reach out and give a gentle kiss, to try and make up for the last words he had read.
"Please, sir, don't" she said backing away. He could feel her fear as she began shaking and looking around for something that was not there.
"Of course, I am sorry" he replied, "But please let me help you to your door. No funny business, I promise." He lifted his fingers, "Scouts honor" he smiled. He was relieved to see she smiled back. His heart lifted to know he made that smile appear. If only he could bring more to her lovely face.
"Okay, but only to the door," she paused trying to remember his name.
"Right, Gideon, thank you," the smile returning to her heart shaped face.
He walked her to the apartment entrance, watching as she dug in her purse for her keys. "Thank you, again, but I have it from here." She said firmly, looking around searching for an invisible spy that maybe watching them, even he wondered if the unseen eyes were on them now.
"As promised, my lady," he bowed with a flourish of his hand. His heart leapt at the sound of laughter that escaped her lips. The sound carried on the wind, a tiny tune as sweet as her voice when she sang.
"Good night" and with that she was gone, the door closing slowly behind her.
He returned home, straightened his desk, and retrieved her journal. He reached in his pocket pulling the kerchief to his nose, inhaling deeply at her scent. With her laughter still singing in his ears he returned to her story
"After my last encounter with Aidan I had hoped he would not return. Given my swollen face and the difficulty I had in sitting, I had no choice but to cancel my date with Chris and avoid my classes on campus. I tried to stay awake for as long as I could but sleep finally took me over. I entered a room filled with roses and calla lilies. I found Aidan standing in the middle, a lily in his hand and a smile on his face. The smile quickly faded once he saw the bruises on my face. He came upon me, in a blink he was infront of me. I cringed as he reached out and tenderly touched my face, sadness deepening the green of his eyes.
'I knew I had gone too far but I did not realize how far.' He whispered.
'What did you expect? Your marks were strong enough to be left on me when I woke, do you realize that?' I answered my head bent, not looking up from the floor.
My god how can he not remember what he had done to me? I yanked my shirt above my head and turned around, 'Look at me!' I screamed, 'Look at what you did to me!' I sobbed and collapsed to my knees. I could hear his own sob as he fell to my level, a shaken hand reaching to the welts and scabbed gashes that now scarred my back.
'I…I did not mean to…to" words failed him.
'To what, hurt me? What did you intend? To scare me, break me? To rape me?'
'What?! I never, I would never…'
'My God Aidan, don't you remember what you did to me? Don't you dare say it just a nightmare, it was you…it was all you. You have your wish, I will never again doubt your existence!' I sobbed. I wanted to escape so badly, but where could I run? Where could I go that he would not find me?
Spitting his words back at him seemed to open a memory. I could feel it tear thru him as he recalled the events of the night before.
'I am sorry. Forgive me, Lisbeth, forgive me. I did not mean it, I was so angry; I don't know what came over me. Please, I… I…' he just stopped speaking.
'I saw the real you, the monster you truly are under this human appearance. That creature is not who I swore myself to. He is not who I have spent the last years of my life with, or surrendered my youth to.' I stopped at the sound of my own sobbing.
The sounds of his quiet sob, the absence of his body as he retreated from me, the horror I found on his face, brought out the girl in me, the girl who remembered his tenderness, his loneliness, and God help me but I turned to him, reaching across to caress his face, 'Promise me, that thing will never return to me. Promise me you will never hurt me that way again.'
His tear filled eyes looked up to meet mine, 'I swear to you, it will never happen again, it should never have happened to begin with. I had no idea I was capable of such a thing.'
'I will find a way to sever the link between us, do you understand?' I picked his chin up and forced him to see how serious I was, 'I will kill myself before I let you touch me again if that thing ever comes near me. This is a vow I will keep. Do you hear me goddamn you?'
'No, you can't leave me, never, promise me, never' he begged. God save me but I agreed.
'Don't touch me, don't..' I said as I pushed his hand away. 'If you love me, if you ever loved me, you will leave me alone. I can't stand you near me right now. Please, let me dream of something else or not at all, but leave me.'
'As you wish' he said slowly and the room faded away to nothing.
It has been months since this last encounter and I am the happier for it. For the first time in my young life I rejoice in the sun rather than wait impatiently for it to set. I have opened myself up to my friends and have decided to welcome life in any way I can find it. I only hope this lull lasts for a long while.
I traveled back to my childhood home today. I actually went in search of that damned old house that Aidan claimed was his prison. The property has been restored; the manor rebuilt and full of life. I am not sure who lives there, as it appeared there were only workmen on site. His he there still? Has he moved on? I wanted so much to sense his presence. I waited until nightfall like some sick stalker, but there was no movement from within, he did not emerge into the night as I had hoped. If he is in fact a real being, why will he not show himself to me? At this point I will take any appearance, dream or reality.
It has been so long since he has fed from me, I feel so full as if too much blood is running thru me. A pressure building up in me that is almost more than I can bear. I have started thinking of cutting myself just to find relief. Please Aidan, if you can read me, read my thoughts, come to me soon.
He answered my prayers; he came to me last night. We were in the garden near a small lake with the moon reflecting in the water. I was looking out on it alone, a slight breeze picking up my hair and caressing my face, when I felt his lips on my shoulder.
'Have you forgiven me, my little bird?' He asked.
'Yes,' I whispered as he turned me into a gentle kiss. I returned the kiss with such passion I surprised myself. I must be sick to want to be in the arms of the man who was so brutal.
'I need to feel you inside me, please, I have ached for your touch, do not deny me now.' I begged.
'Lisbeth,' he sighed in relief, his fangs extracted and he entered me with such a passion my knees buckled beneath me as the fiercest wave ran thru me. He drew from me in long hard swallows, and I found myself reaching up and pulling him in deeper. I came in that moment of sweet release as he drew his final drops from me.
'I've missed you too' he smiled as he caressed my hair from my face.
Frantic, and with a lust I did not think myself capable of, I pulled at his clothes, my mouth burning as it touched his skin. His head fell back as I proceeded, his own passion rising to meet mine. I blush as I write these words, but I swear his absence had driven me mad. He pushed me down onto the grass parting my legs with his knees. My fingers moved from his chest to release his pants and find his hard member waiting for me.
'I am yours, my love, and I have been left wanting, please find your way home to me.'
He smiled at my words bringing a sweet kiss to my mouth; his finger pressing in where his bite was still hot to the touch. I lowered my head to feel him touching and sucking his way down my body. My eyes opened wide as his tongue found his way to my sex, moving in small circles around my sensitive button. Wave upon wave of heat hit me in succession as my hips began rocking and grinding into his mouth. He laughed at my reaction, 'perhaps I should leave you wanting more often my sweet little bird.'
I only responded with moans, grabbing his hair in my hands silently pleading for the sweet torture to return. He retuned his mouth to me and just as I was to be pushed over, he slowed to a stop. 'patience my love, patience'
Damn him but he was reveling in my torture.
'Please, more, I want more' I tried to move but he had me pinned beneath his grip. His kisses turning to my inner thigh,
'I have never drank from you in this spot. I have denied you such a treat.' He whispered and I gasped when I felt his fingers enter me, pulling and pushing in slow strokes, curving his fingers within me, hitting a spot I did not know was there. I began rocking my hips pumping myself greedily against this invasion while he pressed his thumb on my clit. I was a thrashing and moaning as his mouth began sucking on my thigh, 'Now please, now' I pleaded for release, I didn't care that he may take too much from me, I could die and do so willing in his arms on this night, in this garden. Just when I thought I would break, his teeth sunk into my tender flesh. The familiar pull taking me over the edge and I screamed his name into the night sky. I felt his mouth curl into a satisfied smile.
In one night, he held me captive again, a slave to his touch and his desires.