I woke up and didn't know where i was. I had no idea why i would be disoriented like that, since i was pretty certain i was lying in my own bed. And then i realised what it was i was seeing, the thing that was confusing me completely: there was a topless girl looking down at me.
That was something that didn't usually happen.
It kind of threw me.
Everything else was normal. There were my bedroom curtains just like always, the mid-morning sunlight streaming through them as usual, and i could hear my clock radio playing quietly and patiently on my bedside table.
It was just this topless girl that was out of place.
Completely out of place.
Not that i was complaining, mind you.
She had this scruffy yellow-brown hair - let's be generous and call it "blonde" - tumbling down about and across her face like she had curtains of her own, and her boobs - which were a little on the small side, since you ask - were three shades lighter than the rest of her skin. I could clearly see, through my sleep-clouded eyes, that she'd chosen a bandeau bikini top for summer. Her nipples were as pink as the plastic nipple on the feeding bottle that had come with my sister's Real Baby Alive doll, a constant companion she'd had when she was six. Blinking again to try to clear the nightcrust from my lids, i thought that maybe it was the orange light from the curtains that was making them look so pink. Either way, they weren't as girly-girl pink as the little pink flowers on her underpants, or the plastic-looking beads on her cheap, junk jewellery bracelet.
Her lips were just parted, far enough that i could see her teeth. Or the glistening white of her two front teeth, anyway.
It was like she was grinning.
I wondered why she'd be grinning.
I sort of raised myself half onto my elbows, and started to say something.
But what to say?
The first thing that came to my mind to say was, 'Can i help you?', but that didn't seem like such a good opening line.
Instead, i just sort of hung there, halfway to a sitting position, and i pulled the sheet a little further up, to cover my bare and disappointingly hairless chest a little more...
Then i realised. Being summertime, i was sleeping under just a sheet, and my morning boner was jutting away under that thin layer, proudly on display for all the world - at that moment, the topless girl - to see.
Now i felt i had to say something. Anything. So long as it turned her attention away from my erection.
'Nice piercing,' i tried, pointing at her navel.
Her teeth went into hiding as her grin turned into a smile.
'Thanks. Move over.'
Had she said "move over"? I pawed at my eyes to try to clear the sleep from them properly. Maybe i was hearing things. Seeing things and hearing things.
You know. Seeing things and hearing things that weren't there.
Cos i was sure seeing things and hearing things. Things beyond all probability.
Maybe this was some new sort of wet dream thing. Like lucid dreaming. I'd tried that, you know, lucid dreaming. That's where you try to leave yourself a subconsciously-stored trigger word so that you can let yourself know that you're asleep and dreaming, and then you can take over the dream, and basically do whatever you want.
Mostly what i wanted to do, if i ever managed to get into one of these lucid dreams, was to have a topless girl climb into bed with me.
'What? Hey, i said move over. You gunna move over?'
I moved over.
'You gunna let me in?'
I'd assumed she'd wanted to sit on the bed. Turns out, she wanted to get into the bed. With me.
'Have any boxers on? That's OK by me. OK by you if i take these pants off?'
But she'd already taken the underpants off.
And then she was climbing into the bed. Lifting up the sheet. Seeing my morning boner. Sliding her girl-fragrant legs against my boy-hairy legs. Her breast brushing my arm.
'OK,' she said. And waited for me to start. Doing something.
I was at a loss. I think my expression said as much.
'Melanie said you'd be OK with this,' she said, a little impatiently.
'You know my sister?'
It was a cute laugh, if a little patronising.
'Fuck yeah. We're in Business Management together at Uni. Did you think i just wandered in here off the street?'
She took hold of my cock under the sheet. It was hard to miss. She started to stroke it. My balls drew up into a tight little avocado (hence my trigger word!) and prepared themselves for action.
'I... could you stop that for a moment, please...'
I couldn't believe i'd just said that.
She let go and rolled back away from me.
'You're not OK with this, are you?'
For a horrible second i thought she was going to get out of the bed.
I had to get this shit straight, fast.
'I... just wondered what your name is.'
She shrugged. 'Melanie said that you wouldn't be interested in names. I'd rather not say, actually.'
I must have looked perplexed at that. She wrinkled her brow.
'I don't want you tagging me on Facebook or any shit like that,' she explained. 'Look, you OK with this or not?'
My cock was OK with it. It was leaking onto the sheet already, wondering what the hold up was.
'You want i should download you an app so you can figure this out? I was about to go for a swim in your pool, and when i got undressed i happened to mention to Melanie that i was feeling a bit horny, and she suggested i come in here.'
What the hell was Melanie up to?
'It's two minutes, dude. Three tops. Your call.'
'Do you... like... what...'
'Tick tick tick, dude.'
'Well, how old are you, at least. I don't want to be doing any statutory rape shit.'
'My drivers licence is in my purse, which is my handbag, which is in Melanie's room. You want i should go get it, officer?'
'You slept here or something?'
'Fuck, dude. You were sure out to it last night! Yes, me and... some other girls who shall also remain nameless... slept here. We were working on this assignment thing... Anyway, is this interview for publication or are you OK to do this now?'
It seemed like a trap, but i couldn't figure it out. So i just nodded.
'OK. We don't need this then, do we,' she decided, dragging the sheet off of us and tossing it aside. Then she got up onto her knees and straddled my belly, facing me, her pale little tits all pointy and alert.
With the expertise and detachment of someone squeegeeing a windscreen, she took hold of my cock again, raised it to an appropriate angle, and sat herself back on to it.
She was my first.
I was twenty-one, so i wasn't about to admit that to an eighteen year old.
She put her hands on my shoulders when she was confident that i was all the way in, and then she started to jig up and down on me.
It was just exactly like those videos on the internet. Except i had a lousy view of what was going on.
She closed her eyes and threw back her head, her blonde hair dancing about her face as she bounced up and down. She let go my shoulders and raised herself up a bit. I could feel my stiffness moving about inside her, angle-wise. A couple of somethings inside of her, one of them me, one of them her, lined up in what was clearly the correct way, and there was a sudden pleasing sensation that stretched from the tip of my prick to the soles of my feet.
'I think i'm going...'
'Not yet, dude.'
I had been pushing into her, i realised, once she'd frozen. I stopped that pushing and tried to think about unsexy things.
Shit! Does she have herpes?
Maybe that was why Melanie sent her in here, to give me herpes. To punish me for all the times i pulled the head off her Real Baby Alive doll when she was six...
'You OK now?'
'I'm not sure...'
'It's just that i can feel you going soft, dude. You're meant to calm it down, not stop altogether.'
I tried to put all thoughts of herpes and other incurable venereal diseases out of my mind.
I looked at her face, to see if i thought she would be the kind of girl to infect a stranger with VD. Her lip looked like it had a coldsore on it.
'Is that a coldsore?' i asked, my blood running cold. I knew that coldsores and herpes were related somehow...
She wiped at her mouth with her hand, and the coldsore came off. She looked at it where it stuck to her finger, then she licked it off. 'Muesli flake. You OK to go again?'
I nodded. She started jouncing up and down again. Which was nice, but it was when she switched to a sawing movement, grinding back and forth on me, that i lost it.
For the first two seconds of the orgasm i was in absolute physical paradise.
Then, for the next two seconds, i was self-conscious: no-one had ever seen me come before.
Then, for the two seconds after that, i was ashamed that i'd finished before her.
Then for the rest of the time we were stuck together, i wanted to be able to do the whole thing over again.
'OK,' she said when she'd had enough sticking together time, and stood up, just like that, lifting herself off of me. My cock flopped out of her, all slick with my cum. She stood over me, tottering unsteadily on the mattress. 'Thanks.'
She half climbed, half jumped off the bed.
She flicked her blonde hair back and ran her fingers through it, weaving a rough plait.
She still had the ugly plastic bracelet on. Then she wrapped it around her plait and i saw that it was actually an ugly plastic hair tie.
'You got tissues?' she asked, not looking at me, but instead inspecting my meagre collection of sci-fi paperbacks.
I had tissues, sure, but they were my wanking tissues. I didn't really want to have her look too closely at the box, in case there were telltale signs of wanking on it.
'Come on, you have to have a wank box,' she said, a little impatiently.
So i dug it out from under my bed, knocked some of the dustbunnies off of it, and handed it to her.
She pulled out a goodly wad and went into a half squat, mopping at her cum-oozing pussy.
Having done her best to wipe me off of and out of her, she tossed the smeary wad onto the floor. I saw it land on my favourite t-shirt, and stick there.
She picked up her underpants and pulled them up her legs.
The little pink flowers, especially the little rosettes on each side, looked faintly ridiculous now.
'OK,' she said, with an air of finality, her hands on her hips. 'You gunna come for a swim?'
'Maybe later,' i said, non-commitally. She shrugged and looked at herself in my filthy shaving mirror.
'OK. See you, then.'
And two seconds later she was gone.
I lay there for a good ten minutes, listening to my clock radio still patiently playing away to itself. I tried to put it all together, but it was not fitting the way it all should.
I climbed out of bed and shuffled through my floordrobe for my boardies. They had a stain on them, but they were OK. I pulled them on commando over my still sensitive cock, and padded down to the lower level of the house, where i found several girls, one of which was my sister, and one of which was my first time, sitting topless around the pool. Two girls were swimming.
'Hey,' Melanie greeted me. 'Don't mind us.'
'That's fine,' i said, looking around at all the naked breast flesh, while trying simultaneously to avoid seeing my sister's tits too many times. 'You mind if i hang here a while?'
Melanie shrugged as if it were the least important thing in the world to her. So i sat on the vacant banana lounge.
The girl with remnants of my ejaculate inside her didn't make eye contact. It was as if nothing had happened between us.
There was this one girl, though. A brunette. Long straight chocolate-coloured hair, wet from the pool, clinging to her generous boobs, her puckered nipples peeking through the strands like strawberries.
I caught her looking at me a couple of times.
How nice would that be, i thought to myself.
How nice would that be.
I compared her to the blonde, who was now rubbing suncream into her shoulders.
The brunette, i decided, would be much better.