Chapter 14: Decisions
I didn't know who to talk to with this new source of information I had.
My dad raped Liam when he was little.
And when I learned of this, three nights ago, I haven't been able to sleep since.
Liam hasn't spoken a word to me. I barely heard him say anything over the past few days now that I think about it.
It must have been horrible for him to carry the secret for so long and never speak it to anyone but me.
It must have been gut wrenching.
I lay in my bed, staring blankly at the wall.
My dad is a rapist.
My dad is a rapist.
My dad is a rapist.
My dad is a rapist.
The more times I repeat these words in my head, the more that I start to believe them.
My dad, the man who use to take me to the movies, and buy me pretty things like jewelry, and dresses, and dolls, was the exact same man who violated my brother.
I believed it but at the same time, I didn't want to.
I wanted to be comforted, but at the same time, I told Chris to leave me alone. His presence would make me feel loads better, but I didn't want him to just lay up here and be bored while I was in a bad mood.
My phone vibrated.
Speak of the devil. That was probably him. I grabbed it and looked to the screen. It said "dad" calling. And right there, all my anger came back.
I sat up and threw the phone hard against the wall, breaking it, and I lay back in my bed and close my eyes.
The next moment I opened them, I see Chris sitting on my bed, watching me. I hadn't realized I fell asleep.
My brows furrowed. "You're a creep." I said in a groggy voice.
He half smiled, that charming smile that makes me melt.
He leans over and use his thumb to wipe my tears. "I would ask you what's wrong but I know you won't tell me." In his other hand, I see he held a red rose.
"Is that for me?" I whispered.
He nods and gives me the rose.
I take it and put it to my nose. It smells really sweet. "Thank you, baby." I whisper.
Chris climbs onto the bed behind me and pulls me against him.
Okay. I was wrong. I really needed to be comforted.
Chris ran his nose up against the nape of my neck, making a shiver run down my back. I shut my eyes.
I shouldn't want it. Especially not at a time like this, but I did. And it would definitely distract me.
"I won't make you do it if you're not in the mood. Just know that I'm here." He whispered before grazing my ear with his teeth. I nodded as I held back a moan.
I opened my eyes and turned my head slightly. "Thank you."
He nodded his head and entwined his fingers through mine and held me to him. A moment later, we both fell asleep.
When we woke up, I noticed that I wasn't fully concerned of whether or not Liam would catch us.
I was sitting up, and Chris leaned against the wall, sitting behind me. I shouldn't have told him. Liam never said don't tell anyone but I know this was a secret, a dark secret. I had to tell someone. I trusted Chris.
"I didn't know anything about that shit, Summer. He never even told me." Chris said in a low voice.
I nod my head. "He didn't tell anyone. And I don't blame him. That's…heavy."
"You never told him about your dad touching you either, did you?"
I shake my head. "And I thought the touching was bad enough but…"
Chris sighed. "This is just so fucked up."
"He just played it off like Liam hated him just because me and his relationship was so close. He pretended like he did nothing to deserve Liam's hate. But this whole time he's been lying. No wonder my mother became a drunk. Being with him, I don't blame her."
"You don't blame yourself for it either, do you?"
I shrugged my shoulders.
"Listen to me," he made me turn my head to meet his eyes. "None of the shit your dad did is your fault. What he did to Liam, or what he did to you. None of that is all on you. Because you were too young to understand, and you were confused. Do not blame yourself for that shit, Summer."
I swallowed my tears and nod my head.
"I don't give a fuck what you say. You are fucking perfect to me." He whispers.
He brings me back to lay on his chest. I close my eyes. I'm no where near close to perfect. But hearing these words coming from Chris. Someone who I feel is just about close to perfect as a person could get, warmed my heart up a bit.
My door suddenly swings open and I don't even have time to move.
But thankfully, it was only Imogene.
She looked between me and Chris and sighed as her eyes stopped on mine. "What did you do to him?"
"What?" I asked.
"Liam. He's so dead to the world. What did you do?"
"What makes you think I did anything? Maybe he finally realized he's about to marry a slut and he's become depressed from the revelation."
She bitterly chuckles. "Or maybe he's realized that you're a liar and you're sneaky."
"If I am, then so are you."
"In what way?"
"I'm not in the mood. Oh my god, I'm really not in the fucking mood." I whispered. I just turned my head and continued laying against Chris's chest.
"It's a little sick, Christopher, don't you think?"
"I don't think about anything you say but what are you talking about?" He asked in a dry voice.
"Her. You were lusting after her since she was fifteen. You were lusting over a minor. You don't find it sick?"
"I waited until she grew up. You think I would just do that for any girl?" He chuckles. "For you?"
This comment made her hard expression soften to embarrassment. "I'm going to get Liam right now and I'm going to bring him up here to show him how his best friend and his sister treats him like he's not important."
"Do it. I don't care." Chris says.
My head jotted up. "No! Don't you dare. He is stressed out enough. Don't be a bitch this one time. Don't."
Imogene's nostrils flared.
"You don't know what he's going through. Just leave him alone. I'm going to tell him soon. Let him stay isolated right now."
Imogene shook her head. "Tell him soon. He deserves to know. And maybe you should be the one to stay away from him. He didn't become this way until the day you came home. Coincidence?"
I just laid back against Chris's chest.
"And Chris, you're a perv for what you did. She was only fifteen for Christ sake."
He stuck up his middle finger at her.
She rolled her eyes, walked out, and shut the door.
I took a deep breath.
I think keeping her in this house is going to make Liam worst.
"Tell me about the business you invested in."
"What?" Chris asked.
I look up at him. "Before we left to Vegas, you said you were starting a business. What is it?" I asked.
"I don't think that's important."
"It is to me. I want to talk about something else other than Liam for once."
He sat up more, looking a bit uneasy.
"What is it?" I asked.
"I don't want you to be pissed off."
"There is nothing else that could piss me off more than I am already. Lay it on me."
Chris sighed. "Okay. So, I officially own a strip club now."
I raised my eyebrow. I was a little taken back by it. Maybe I shouldn't be pissed off by it, but I guess my emotions had began to get the best of me. "Of all things you can invest in, you choose a strip club? A club full of naked women."
"I knew you would act like that."
"Why that of all things? I don't understand."
"What don't you understand about it? I bought it. It's mine. It's not like I'm going to be fucking every girl in the strip club."
"I don't know that." I said.
He chuckles. "Really? Really, Summer?"
He moves from behind me to climb off of the bed. "You see what you're doing? You just made a big deal out of the tiniest fucking thing. You're pushing me away again. You want to find a reason to argue."
"That's not true. What girl wants her boyfriend to run a strip club?"
"I don't feel like it's a big deal. I'm running it, and I don't give a fuck what you have to say about it." He turned, walked to the door and pulled it open.
"Where are you going? I'm not done talking to you."
"Yes you are. You're not even talking, you're trying to argue, and I don't have time for it. But I get that you need the space so I'm going to give it to you."
"Chris, we need to talk about it."
"No the fuck we don't. Because I'm not in the mood to argue about the unnecessary shit, Summer. Love you." He walked out and slammed the door shut.
I glared at the door. "Love you too, asshole."
I walked down the stairs, entering the foyer where the slut was waiting. Like she knew I would be coming down soon. I stopped on the last stair. "Stalking me?" I asked.
She shrugged her shoulders. "Maybe."
"What are you doing? I don't get you."
"What do you mean?"
"One second, you care about Liam, and yelling at his sister and blaming her for him being depressed. The next second, you're all over me and I don't get you. Like I said."
"I care about Liam. He's good to me. He's an amazing person. He's good. He's too good."
"Then you don't really know him."
"From what I've seen, he's good. But a girl like me has taste for both good and bad. He's the good, and you're the bad."
"So let me see if I understand. You marry him, but you fuck me?"
She smiles. "You make it sound so unusual, but that's the idea. Yes."
"You don't care about him. Not if you're really thinking this shit is going to work. I have no attraction towards you."
"Anymore, you mean."
"Not even when I fucked you. I was drunk off of absinthe, and you just happen to be standing there. Let's not pretend that night was anything other than a fucking mistake. And sweetheart, you're not that fucking irresistible like you think you are."
"So you'd prefer a young girl to me."
"See, that's another thing I don't understand. I've just told you, I waited until she became eighteen to be with her."
"But you had a thing for her since she was fifteen."
"How do you even know that?"
"Liam told me. And he also told me how pissed off it made him. He doesn't want you to lay one finger on her."
I stepped off the last stair and ran my fingers through my hair. "Too late for that. I touched her in everyway she wanted me to."
"Not giving a damn about what Liam would say in the process. I notice that you like to hurt him a lot. Fucking his girlfriend, and then fucking his sister. Two blows. What kind of best friend are you?"
"What kind of fiancée are you to accept his proposal, but to want to fuck his best friend?"
"I know I don't deserve him. And neither do you deserve her."
"You tell me shit I'm already aware of. Now I'm just bored." I walk out of foyer to the double doors and walk out of the doors.
I wasn't going to end the club business just because it pissed Summer off. But I know she won't stay mad at me for long. She's just emotional because of this shit with Liam. I wouldn't have guessed that after all these years, he'd hide some shit like that from me. I was wrong. I overlook everything. Now I feel fucked up for always getting involved with the girls that are off limits to me. Getting involved with Summer was way more off limits than Imogene was.
Everything tells me to leave her alone because if I stay with her, I lose my best friend. My best friend who I grew up with, my best friend who always had my back and I had his. Always.
Then there's Summer.
She was that girl.
There are beautiful girls in the world.
Then there's Summer. The most gorgeous thing I ever seen in my life.
When she's in my view, no one else matters.
When we kiss, no one else matters.
There's only her.
So I'm just so damn torn between whether I should leave her and keep my friendship with Liam.
Or should I leave my friendship with Liam and stay with the one, and the only girl I ever really cared about?