Author's Note: Before you read, I thought you should know that the disturbing thing that I said was going to happen is not going to happen until the beggining of the next chapter. Sorry but enjoy this chapter. I'm writing the next one right now. It might be long or it might not. Who knows? Oh and for you people that reads Immortal love will always be dead, I'll update soon as possible. (I'm having a bad case of writers block)
Chapter 9: He's the medicine to my pain
When I got home, Nate was sleep. I thanked god for that. I went into the kitchen and made me two sandwiches and got one big bag of chips and a two liter of pop and brought it to my room. I ate all of it. And I mean all. The phone rang and I picked up and held it to my ear. "Hello?" I asked.
"I'm coming over, Leah. Open the front door." Alex said. My somewhat happy mood disappeared. "Um. Okay." I answered. He hung up and I did too and went downstairs to unlock the door. I looked over at the cable box and the bright green numbers said ten o nine. Why was he coming over so late? I went back upstairs and flipped through the channels on my TV. Three minutes later, Alex walked through my door and shut it close. He had roses in his hand and a small beige teddy bear. "Hey." He whispered. I sat up and looked at him. "Hey. What are you doing here?" I asked. He sat down on the bed and looked at me. He didn't have that usual angry glare.
His expression was softer. "I wanted to apologize to you, Leah. I've been such a dick to you. I am so sorry." His eyes watered. Oh my god. He was about to cry. I can't stand to see guys cry. They always make me want to. I crawled over to him and placed my hand on his shoulder. "Here" He gave me the roses and the teddy bear. I smiled at him. "Thank you." I whispered. He looked into my eyes and brushed the side of my face with his fingertips. "I love you, Leah." My eyes widened. Was he serious? Really serious? Or was he just trying to make me like him again so that he can continue fucking me without me fighting it?
"You do?" He nodded. "Yeah and….I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you." I shook my head. "No. It's okay. I love you too." I said putting the roses on my pillow. His eyes stayed on mine. He slowly leaned over and kissed me. It was different. He didn't force his tongue in my mouth or feel on me while he kissed me. He just kissed me and it was filled with excitement and passion. I pulled away for a second. He looked at me confused. I lifted my shirt up and pulled it over my head. What was I doing? Pushing myself into another trap was what I was doing. He slid his jacket off and threw it onto the bed I laid down against my pillows and he laid on top of my body and planted soft kisses again my temple and my jawline. I closed my eyes and sighed pleasurably.
This moment reminds me of the night me and Alex first had sex. The night he took my virginity. But the difference was that that night, I had a fear of losing my virginity. But tonight, I didn't have a fear of having sex. I had a fear of Alex. Just in general. But in a way, the fears I have for him just turn me on.
I didn't want to waste any time, I helped him pull his shirt off and threw it across the room. He stared into my eyes. "Say it again." I whispered. "Say what?" He asked. I closed my eyes. "Tell me you love me." I breathed.
His hands slipped under the fabric of my shorts and he cupped my pussy. I moaned in his ear. "I love you." He whispered to me. Was this true? Did he really feel this way or was it all just bullshit again? But it probably wasn't because I never heard him tell Carsia that he love her just to be able to fuck her. The phone rang. I was trying to pull away from Alex but he kept me in the place I was and continued kissing my neck. I reached over and grabbed it anyway and hit the button and then placed it against my ear. "Hello?" It sounded like a moan. "Um. Hello? Can I speak to Leah Hart?" It was a male. Alex rose my shirt up and brushed my stomach with his fingertips. It sent shivers through my body. "This is her." I said in a shaky voice.
"Oh. Hey, this is Ronnie." My eyes widened. I sat up immediatley. Alex pulled his eyebrows together and glared at me. "Oh. Hi." I said crawling off the bed. Alex grabbed my arm and pulled me towards him. " Let me go!" I shouted.
"Leah, you okay?" Ronnie asked through the phone. I stared into Alex's eyes. I wasn't feeling fear but I felt anger. "Leah?" Ronnie asked. Alex suddenly grabbed the phone and held it to his ear. "Who the fuck is this?" Alex asked. I tried to grab the phone but he kept pushing me away. "Yes." Alex said through the phone. I was basically in tears. "Don't call here no more." Alex said and then hung up the phone. I looked at him in disbelief. "Who was that?" He asked. Anger clearly in his tone. "No one." I answered. He walked up to me slowly. I knew he was about to hit me. "Alex, It was no one. I promise." He raised the phone about to hit me with it. I moved out of the way as he threw it in my direction. It hit the wall and broke in two pieces. "What is wrong with you?" I snapped.
"Are you fucking somebody else?" He asked. I can't believe he'd ask me that. Technically, I was being forced to cheat on him. "No. I'm not." I said as tears slipped out of my eyes.
"What the fuck is you crying for then?" I just shook my head and closed my eyes. He was so sweet a second ago and now........he was back to himself. His expression softened.
Alex grabbed my waist and pulled me to him. "I'm sorry." He said. I pushed him away from me. "Leave me alone." I said. He stared at me expressionless. "You want this to be over?" I nodded without hesitation. He smiled a little and then frowned. "Okay. Okay. If that's what you want. But if I were you, I wouldn't try to get close to any other guy." he said grabbing his jacket. "Why?" I asked.
Alex stopped in the doorway and turned to me. "They just might get hurt." He answered before turning back and disappearing down the hallway. I sighed and sat on the bed. Me and Alex was over relationship wise but......I had a terrible feeling like something bad was going to happen soon. I just didn't know what. Maybe if I tell Alex about the baby, he wouldn't hurt me so bad. Because the thing was, I wanted Alex more than I wanted a million dollars. Alex was a million dollars. But.....he didn't feel that way for me. For me, I was nothing to him. Just his slut who he can fuck whenever he wanted.
I couldn't do this anymore. Alex couldn't just keep me away from someone I wanted to be around. Was he crazy? I went downstairs and grabbed the other phone. Too many damn phones in this house. I pressed redial and held the phone to my ear.
"Hello?" Asked a deep voice. I smiled.
"Ronnie, I'm so sorry about before. That was my boyfriend being a dick but he's gone now."
"It's okay, Leah. It's just-"
"What?" I asked as I sat down on the couch.
"I feel like something bad is happening to you."
"Why do you feel that way?"
"I have no clue."
"Don't worry about me, Ronnie. I'm fine. I promise." Me and Ronnie talked about everything. Except our families. It was crazy how close we became after knowing each other for such a short time. He made me feel better. Me and him knew more about eachother than me and Alex did. And I've known Alex for more than six or seven years. When I looked over at the clock, it was four twenty seven. "I can't believe we're still on the phone." I said yawning. "Neither can I. Who knew that we'd talk for this long?" I smiled. "I'm going to bed, okay?"
"Okay, Leah. Are you coming in the store tomorrow? "
"Yeah. Probably around one." I answered yawning again.
"Make it seven A.M."
"Yeah right." I said sarcastically. Ronnie chuckled and then sighed.
"Goodnight, Ronnie." I said and then hung up the phone. I was suddenly excited to go see him. His whole personality was so different from Alex's. I mean Alex was aggressive, sexual,mean. And Ronnie seemed to be the exact opposite. I still remember how I felt when he kissed me. The way his soft lips felt. I touched my lips with my finger. I can still remember his taste. It wasn't long until I drifted off to sleep.
When I woke up the next morning, I felt sick. I ran upstairs and threw up in the toilet. Damn I felt horrible. I heard knocking at the bathroom door. I already knew who it was. Nate. He opened the door and looked at me. "Get out. I need to shower. Unless you're willing to join me." A sudden smile formed. I quickly got off of the floor. Nate placed a hand against the wall to block my exit. 'You look like shit." He commented. "Thank you." I said glaring at him. He moved his arm away and I left out of the bathroom. I went into my room and looked at my clock. Eleven twenty. What am I going to do for two hours? Oh yeah. Eat. I went downstairs and got a bowl of cereal with some toast, eggs and grits on the side. My god. Best fucking thing in the world. I watched two episodes of my favorite show: Dexter.
I took a shower and washed my hair. I looked into my long mirror at my stomach. Not fat yet. But I will be soon. I can tell. I grabbed my black skirt and black flats and slipped them on. Got my red bra on and my red v-neck shirt on and placed a black clip in my hair. Was I really getting all dressy dressy for a guy who's not even my boyfriend yet? Keyword is yet.
I grabbed my purse and headed out of the door. A couple of minutes later, I walked into the store. Ronnie was handing a lady a bag of something. He looked good in black. Actually kind of sexy. The lady walked pass me out of the store and his eyes matched mine. "Hey." He said. "Hi." I said back as I leaned against the counter. "You look amazing. Did you wear that outfit for me?" He asked licking his lips. Yes. "No." I answered. He rolled his eyes. "You want to come back here with me?" Yes. "You sure it's okay?" He nodded. "Yeah my uncle never comes to check on me." He walked away for a second and I heard a door open. I walked in and closed the door behind me. "I was wondering ever since that day. If you don't mind me asking, what did the test say?" He asked. I had not a clue what he meant at first. "Oh. It said.......negative." I lied. Yes it was wrong and I wanted to stab myself for lying to this guy. This cute, warm, hot, fucking sexy, amazing guy. But I had to. What guy would want to get involved with a pregnant sixteen year old?
"Does that make you happy or sad?" He asked. I shrugged. "I don't know. Let's not talk about it." I said . He nodded understandingly. I looked closely and noticed a cut on his wrist. It looked deep. "What happened?" I asked pointing to the cut. Ronnie looked down at his wrist and his eyebrows pulled together. He pulled his sleeve over it. "My stepdad did it." I looked up at his face and I saw a pained expression. "We spent hours last night talking about everything. Everything except your family. You can tell me about them. I will understand." I assured him. His blue eyes went to mine.
"You don't talk about yours or your boyfriend. All you say is they're dicks. What makes them that way?" I sighed and placed my purse on the small table in the corner. "It's a long story." I answered. A man came up and placed two 'bud lights' on the counter. Flashes of Nate's face came into my mind. I closed my eyes slowly. Stay out of my head. His face just appeared more and more. Ronnie placed his hand on my shoulder and my eyes flashed open. I looked up at him. "You okay?" I nodded and sat in a chair that was next to the table. We hardly got a conversation in as the place became busier and busier. When it was around 3:30, no one was there but me and him.
He sat across from me on a small orange crate. "My step dad abused me since I was three. He was sick and still is. He..........He raped my mom right in front of me. Like he actually forced me to watch it happen. And.......she cried and cried. In my mind, I felt like telling her 'that's what you get for not leaving him sooner'. But I would have never had said that to her. She didn't deserve that." His eyes became watery.
"Where is she now?" I asked. A sudden flash of anger appeared on his face. "Dead." He said coldly.
We stopped talking for a moment. "I am very happy that you felt comfortable sharing that with me, Ronnie. You have no idea how much that means to me." He smiled a little.
"Your turn. Tell me about the boyfriend first."
"Ex.' I corrected him. A grin spreaded across his face. "Well then, tell me about the ex boyfriend." I was scared because I never told anyone about Alex. No one at all.
"Well, Alex is very.....demanding. I guess he feels that he's god and everyone has to bow down and do what he says."
"Do you do everything he say?" I nodded. "Why?" He asked. I shrugged. "Because........I guess it's beacause I'm scared of him."
"Has he ever hurt you before?" His blue eyes gazed into mine. He deserves the truth.
"Yeah but it's no big deal."
"A guy putting his hands on a girl to cause harm is a big deal. What the hell is wrong with him?" I shrugged and then sighed.
"Listen to me, Leah," I looked into his blue eyes. He had a serious expression on his face. "I know I barely know you, but I know you don't deserve that. I care about you. I don't want to see you hurt. I will be there to protect you. Okay?"
I just stared at him. He was talking like we knew eachother forever. "I trust you." I admitted. He leaned in and gently pressed his lips against mine. He pulled back. "I'm sorry for doing that." I smiled. "You keep apologizing for doing something that you keep doing intentionally." I said. He shrugged. "Well in that case, since you see that, I'm not sorry."
I blushed and looked down at my shoes. The day went by kind of fast. Not a lot of customers were coming in but me and Ronnie continued talking. We talked about everything except our family. And I was thankful for that. When the day ended, Ronnie let me take four bags of ruffles. And I was done with them in seconds. We got outside and it was windy and dark. He locked the store and put the key in his jean pocket. Then he slid his jacket off and placed it around me. I loved the smell of it. I had no idea what it was but it drove me crazy with lust. "Where do you live?" He asked. "Three blocks away." Ronnie placed his arm around my waist as we walked. I felt safe and actually comfortable with him which is something I hardly ever felt with Alex.
It's amazing-the chemistry I have with Ronnie. It was almost instant. "You want to go to the park?" He suddenly asked. I looked up at him. "You don't want to get rid of me do you?" He shook his head. "Actually no. I like having you around. Alot. Like alot alot."
"I get it." I laughed. He led me towards the park. No one really goes to it anymore. There was just a swingset and an old rusty slide two yards from it. "I haven't been here since I was twelve." I said. There was one streetlight shining over it. "Let me push you in the swing." He said. I smiled and walked up to it and sat down. He got behind me and pulled the chains back and then let go of them. I haven't felt this happy in so long. So free and it felt good. "What made you want to come here?" I asked.
I suddenly saw him in the swing next to me. "It seems that you don't like home. Like you try to do anything to be away from there. I figured that the longer you're away, the happier you become." He was a good reader. I didn't think I was that good of an open book.
"Well you're right. I guess my stepdad is the one to blame for that." I stopped swinging and he looked at me. "Does he hurt you too?" He asked. His voice was low. I didn't answer. I just looked down at the dirt. I couldn't tell Alex because I knew he wouldn't care. But seem like Ronnie cared so I was comfortable with telling him. Ronnie turned the swing so that he was now facing me. I slowly looked at him. "Has he ever.........touched you?" He asked. I knew what he meant. "He did more than that." I answered. Ronnie sighed and got up. He grabbed my arm, made me stand up and wrapped his arms around my waist. His body was warm against mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and closed my eyes as I laid my head on his shoulder. "You're safe with me." He whispered. Where the hell have this guy been? Probably up there in heaven and then god sent him down by angels for me. Thanks so much god. Ronnie pulled back a little and looked into my eyes. He leaned his forehead against mine and closed his eyes. I closed mine too. I think I loved him. I know it's so soon but.....I don't know how to feel. I liked him way more than alot.
He brushed his lips against mine and tugged at my bottom lip. I gripped his hair in my hands as our kissing became deeper. He placed his hands on my waist and pulled me closer to him. I felt butterflies in my stomach. Something about Ronnie. There was something about him. He was definitely perfect. Our tongues were warm as they rubbed against each other. He moaned under the kiss and it turned me on. I felt warm tingles run down my body to my favorite spot. I wanted him so bad. Way bad than I wanted Alex. I suddenly heard some people laughing loud and glass breaking. I turned and saw three guys walking towards the park. They were dressed in all black. When they came closer, I saw that one of them was Alex. They stopped a few feet from us. Seeing the anger in his eyes told me something bad was about to happen.